1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:02,950 sync & correction by f1nc0 ~ Addic7ed.com ~ 2 00:00:04,555 --> 00:00:07,091 Easy now, this be Ali G. 3 00:00:07,126 --> 00:00:09,961 Back in the year twenty thousand, 4 00:00:09,996 --> 00:00:13,992 me was given me own show, and me became world-famous. 5 00:00:14,070 --> 00:00:17,902 Me life, it became full of the trappings of cebrelity. 6 00:00:17,937 --> 00:00:19,770 Me didn't know who to trust 7 00:00:19,805 --> 00:00:24,208 and started suspecting everyone and becoming paranormal. 8 00:00:24,243 --> 00:00:27,144 Me was becoming obsessed with fame 9 00:00:27,179 --> 00:00:30,648 and losing sight of the things that really matter in life, 10 00:00:30,683 --> 00:00:33,117 like money, bitches, and drugs. 11 00:00:33,152 --> 00:00:36,487 The low point was when me Julie sat me down one day 12 00:00:36,522 --> 00:00:40,057 and said, "You is changin'. Me don't know the new you." 13 00:00:40,092 --> 00:00:42,026 I told her to [bleep] off. 14 00:00:42,061 --> 00:00:46,430 and started bonin' a much fitter girl from the "X Factor" called Kiara. 15 00:00:46,465 --> 00:00:47,932 A quarterfinalist. 16 00:00:47,967 --> 00:00:50,501 After two months, me realized me had made 17 00:00:50,536 --> 00:00:52,937 the worst mistake of me life... 18 00:00:52,972 --> 00:00:55,506 me had forgotten to use a Connie with her. 19 00:00:55,541 --> 00:00:57,475 And when she wouldn't agree to flush it, 20 00:00:57,510 --> 00:01:01,579 me decided to do the right thing and go back to me Julie. 21 00:01:01,614 --> 00:01:04,448 But there is a happy ending to this. 22 00:01:04,483 --> 00:01:08,052 Three weeks later, Kiara had a miscarriage. 23 00:01:08,087 --> 00:01:11,088 Booyakasha. Enjoy the show. 24 00:01:11,123 --> 00:01:14,825 A way-an-a-say bang-a-rang jam rock! 25 00:01:39,987 --> 00:01:42,987 1x01 - Cannes 26 00:01:43,988 --> 00:01:46,424 Keep it real. 27 00:01:46,459 --> 00:01:50,228 I is come here to Cannes, dat is in France, 28 00:01:50,263 --> 00:01:52,330 which is where the biggest pricks 29 00:01:52,365 --> 00:01:55,233 from all around the world come to sell their films. 30 00:01:55,268 --> 00:01:59,233 And I is gonna try and raise 300 million squid 31 00:01:59,337 --> 00:02:01,305 for a little idea I have. 32 00:02:01,340 --> 00:02:04,909 Peace a peace. West side. 33 00:02:08,581 --> 00:02:12,984 - The film is called "Booka." - "Booka"? Okay. 34 00:02:13,019 --> 00:02:14,652 - Do you like the title? - What does that mean? 35 00:02:14,687 --> 00:02:17,855 Booka is like the sound of when you shoot someone. 36 00:02:17,890 --> 00:02:19,290 "Booka." 37 00:02:19,325 --> 00:02:22,860 Dis is gonna be a film dat doesn't run away 38 00:02:22,895 --> 00:02:24,646 - from the real issues - Right. 39 00:02:24,647 --> 00:02:26,397 of violence and drugs. 40 00:02:26,432 --> 00:02:29,634 Dis is gonna glamorize drugs and violence. 41 00:02:29,669 --> 00:02:31,235 It's going to glamorize them? 42 00:02:31,270 --> 00:02:32,770 - Aii, for real. - Real? 43 00:02:32,805 --> 00:02:34,338 How much money you need? 44 00:02:34,373 --> 00:02:36,841 Well, and I ain't gonna bullshit you 45 00:02:36,876 --> 00:02:39,644 and say, you know, a fake figure. 46 00:02:39,679 --> 00:02:43,414 I ain't gonna undersell it or whatever, but we is lookin' at 400 mil. 47 00:02:43,449 --> 00:02:45,416 400 million dollars? 48 00:02:45,451 --> 00:02:47,485 Is looking at a whole load of special effects 49 00:02:47,520 --> 00:02:49,553 - and all that kind of thing. - Oh. 50 00:02:51,757 --> 00:02:54,292 - Is there room in here? - Yeah, there is now. 51 00:02:54,327 --> 00:02:57,723 - Is there room for about five of us? - We can not overweight the lift. 52 00:02:57,758 --> 00:02:59,563 Is there room for about five of us? 53 00:02:59,598 --> 00:03:01,299 - No. - No. No. No. 54 00:03:01,334 --> 00:03:03,267 - Next one. - What? Is there room? 55 00:03:06,405 --> 00:03:07,939 Is there room for about five of us? 56 00:03:07,974 --> 00:03:10,942 - No! - Let us go. 57 00:03:14,847 --> 00:03:17,348 Let's look at the tape and see what you got. 58 00:03:17,383 --> 00:03:19,684 Okay. Should we go down for the room and look at the tape? 59 00:03:25,257 --> 00:03:27,692 Ali G, that's me. 60 00:03:29,328 --> 00:03:30,761 These are girls that I know. 61 00:03:30,796 --> 00:03:32,263 We can use them, we can check them out. 62 00:03:32,298 --> 00:03:34,732 Oh, okay. Oh, this is two girls. Mm-hmm. 63 00:03:34,767 --> 00:03:37,301 - Good stuff. - Thank you. 64 00:03:38,971 --> 00:03:41,272 As long as it's not just completely thrown in. 65 00:03:44,810 --> 00:03:46,711 You probably need to show some more skin. 66 00:03:46,746 --> 00:03:48,980 Yeah, we need... well, we'll get... 67 00:03:49,015 --> 00:03:52,350 I was trying to get her boobs out, but she wasn't do it. 68 00:03:52,385 --> 00:03:54,518 Well, you'll have to find someone who will. 69 00:03:54,553 --> 00:03:56,520 No, we'll do that, no worries. 70 00:03:58,924 --> 00:04:01,892 I is actually [bleep] that one. 71 00:04:04,397 --> 00:04:06,597 No, we're gonna do the actual thing in Jamaica. 72 00:04:06,632 --> 00:04:09,400 We didn't have the money to fly out to Jamaica. 73 00:04:09,435 --> 00:04:14,238 My boy is here in Jamaica, which is where I am. 74 00:04:14,273 --> 00:04:16,774 I'm not exactly sure, like, story here. 75 00:04:16,809 --> 00:04:19,510 - It's kind of... - This is in Jamaica, this bit. 76 00:04:19,545 --> 00:04:23,280 Uh-huh. 77 00:04:23,315 --> 00:04:24,882 This is... I ain't using bullets there. 78 00:04:24,917 --> 00:04:27,218 I doin' that noise with my mouth. 79 00:04:35,493 --> 00:04:37,328 This is [bleep] me bird. 80 00:04:42,735 --> 00:04:45,336 - We'll get her with her bra off. - I mean, you know... 81 00:04:46,705 --> 00:04:48,639 Try using dat now. 82 00:04:48,674 --> 00:04:52,376 I still love you, girl. 83 00:04:52,411 --> 00:04:54,278 Does he want to do the film? 84 00:04:54,313 --> 00:04:55,546 - Who? - You? 85 00:04:55,581 --> 00:04:57,348 - Do I? Right now? - Aii. 86 00:04:57,383 --> 00:05:00,951 I'd like to see the full script before I commit to it, yes. 87 00:05:00,986 --> 00:05:03,254 Is you getting out the cash? 88 00:05:03,289 --> 00:05:06,290 I don't pay cash. No, I'm not getting out the cash. 89 00:05:06,325 --> 00:05:08,259 Okay, listen, there's one other film 90 00:05:08,294 --> 00:05:10,728 dat I've got that's about... it's called "The Crown." 91 00:05:10,763 --> 00:05:12,396 The story is this... 92 00:05:12,431 --> 00:05:14,932 some terrorists has got into England, 93 00:05:14,967 --> 00:05:18,803 and they has stuck a grenade up the queen's vag. 94 00:05:18,838 --> 00:05:20,371 Well, that's really... 95 00:05:20,406 --> 00:05:22,473 the queen is not gonna like that one very much. 96 00:05:22,508 --> 00:05:24,675 I don't think it has to be up her fanny, but... 97 00:05:24,710 --> 00:05:28,746 - A'ight. Where would you put it up? - I think just having her held hostage 98 00:05:28,781 --> 00:05:31,749 and have a threat on her would show great importance. 99 00:05:31,784 --> 00:05:32,883 So where would you stick the grenade? 100 00:05:32,918 --> 00:05:36,883 And Ali has got 48 hours to get it out. 101 00:05:37,288 --> 00:05:40,257 Well, thanks a lot. It has been a real pleasure. 102 00:05:40,292 --> 00:05:42,326 Pleasure to meet you. You're a nice young man. 103 00:05:42,361 --> 00:05:43,845 - Wicked. - You got some good ideas and I wish 104 00:05:43,846 --> 00:05:46,697 - you all the best in the business. - All right, well, let's do some business. 105 00:05:46,732 --> 00:05:48,332 And let's talk as soon as I read the script. 106 00:05:48,367 --> 00:05:49,633 Okay, wicked. Let's do business. 107 00:06:15,444 --> 00:06:17,212 Jenqui. Yakshemesh. 108 00:06:17,247 --> 00:06:19,648 Hello, I like you. 109 00:06:19,683 --> 00:06:23,585 Everybody say mad dog and English gentleman 110 00:06:23,620 --> 00:06:26,421 go dance in the midnight sun. 111 00:06:26,456 --> 00:06:28,724 But why? I come to England 112 00:06:28,759 --> 00:06:32,361 to find what make English gentleman "English gentleman." 113 00:06:32,396 --> 00:06:34,463 Jankooey. 114 00:06:36,533 --> 00:06:38,333 - Hello? - Borat? 115 00:06:38,368 --> 00:06:40,235 How are you? Nice to see you. 116 00:06:40,270 --> 00:06:41,970 Very nice to see you. 117 00:06:42,005 --> 00:06:45,970 If man come in here with many bodyguard, 118 00:06:46,508 --> 00:06:55,386 rich, with beautiful lady with shaved pussy, with dogs, 119 00:06:55,613 --> 00:06:59,087 - you will serve him? - Oh, yes. Oh, yes. 120 00:06:59,122 --> 00:07:00,989 Here we... 121 00:07:03,760 --> 00:07:06,228 I would do that, 44. 122 00:07:06,263 --> 00:07:08,030 - And then I'd say to you... - What are you doing? 123 00:07:08,065 --> 00:07:09,765 I'm measuring your leg. 124 00:07:12,536 --> 00:07:15,570 - And then I measure... - What do... what do you do? 125 00:07:15,605 --> 00:07:17,506 I measure your leg. 126 00:07:17,541 --> 00:07:20,509 You try to touch... 127 00:07:20,544 --> 00:07:24,446 I don't try to do anything. All I do is measure your leg. 128 00:07:24,481 --> 00:07:28,483 - You are not a homosexual? - Wha... 129 00:07:28,518 --> 00:07:30,652 - Sorry? - You're not a... 130 00:07:30,687 --> 00:07:33,522 I don't think so, but you better ask my wife. 131 00:07:33,557 --> 00:07:35,691 Oh, sorry! I am sorry! 132 00:07:35,726 --> 00:07:38,427 I am sorry! I think suddenly, you touch... 133 00:07:38,462 --> 00:07:41,096 - No problem. - No problem. 134 00:07:41,131 --> 00:07:42,597 Please. You can touch! 135 00:07:42,632 --> 00:07:44,099 Jankooey. 136 00:07:44,134 --> 00:07:46,969 To be English gentleman, I need English lady. 137 00:07:47,004 --> 00:07:51,173 This why I meet Mrs. Heskell, who teach me how to flirt, 138 00:07:51,208 --> 00:07:56,278 so that I can do a sex with English girl. Hmm. 139 00:07:56,313 --> 00:07:59,848 Who come to learn to flirt? 140 00:07:59,883 --> 00:08:01,917 Well, people like you. 141 00:08:04,354 --> 00:08:07,056 That's right, yes. You see, I just had to do 142 00:08:07,057 --> 00:08:09,858 - that and you went flirty. - Yes, I like. 143 00:08:09,893 --> 00:08:11,827 When you meet somebody, you have to look around at them 144 00:08:11,862 --> 00:08:14,129 and think about something you can compliment them on. 145 00:08:14,164 --> 00:08:17,166 So, if you look at me now, think about something you 146 00:08:17,167 --> 00:08:20,769 - like about me and just say... - Um... 147 00:08:20,804 --> 00:08:23,472 you have nice tits. 148 00:08:23,507 --> 00:08:25,274 Tits? 149 00:08:25,309 --> 00:08:27,843 Why you laugh? Tits? Tits? 150 00:08:27,878 --> 00:08:30,512 Tits? I have nice... 151 00:08:30,547 --> 00:08:33,081 is that the kind of compliment you would give to somebody? 152 00:08:33,116 --> 00:08:35,117 Flirting is a prelude to meeting somebody. 153 00:08:35,152 --> 00:08:37,152 Yes. What does is meant, a pro-lude? 154 00:08:37,187 --> 00:08:39,421 A beginning. It's a beginning. 155 00:08:39,456 --> 00:08:42,257 It's a way of connecting with somebody so you can meet them 156 00:08:42,292 --> 00:08:44,827 and decide whether they are somebody you could spend more time with. 157 00:08:44,862 --> 00:08:46,995 So, after how many minutes can I say, 158 00:08:47,030 --> 00:08:49,932 "Hello, do you want to do with a sex please?" 159 00:08:52,936 --> 00:08:54,369 - Hey. - Hello. 160 00:08:54,404 --> 00:08:56,271 - Borat. - Very nice to meet you, my friend. 161 00:08:56,306 --> 00:08:58,006 Very nice to meet you. 162 00:08:58,041 --> 00:09:01,276 You have a gentleman club. 163 00:09:01,311 --> 00:09:05,013 Yes. Now, the idea of my gentlemen's club 164 00:09:05,048 --> 00:09:06,849 has a different connotation. 165 00:09:06,884 --> 00:09:11,053 In Kazakhstan, we have a club where you go, 166 00:09:11,088 --> 00:09:12,888 you have other men, 167 00:09:12,923 --> 00:09:15,858 they come with friends, they watch, they talk, 168 00:09:15,893 --> 00:09:18,894 they do business, they watch a porno 169 00:09:18,929 --> 00:09:23,365 with a man and a woman, 170 00:09:23,400 --> 00:09:27,369 with a one with a shaved pussy. 171 00:09:27,404 --> 00:09:31,369 Very exciting to see is something. 172 00:09:31,974 --> 00:09:35,110 Why you laugh? Why you laugh? 173 00:09:35,145 --> 00:09:37,279 Why you laugh? 174 00:09:37,314 --> 00:09:40,048 You laugh at me? I'm a twit. 175 00:09:40,083 --> 00:09:42,417 - And this? - Jacuzzi. 176 00:09:42,452 --> 00:09:46,021 - It right here? - That's right. 177 00:09:46,056 --> 00:09:50,325 It is fantastic. And what is... 178 00:09:50,360 --> 00:09:53,929 - you have with girl? - Of course. 179 00:09:53,964 --> 00:09:58,367 - What is most number of people you have? - In this one? 180 00:09:58,402 --> 00:10:02,304 Hmm. Four is comfortable, six is a crowd. 181 00:10:02,339 --> 00:10:05,340 Now I go to see English club! 182 00:10:06,410 --> 00:10:08,510 - Hello. - How do you do? 183 00:10:08,545 --> 00:10:10,879 - Very nice. - Mike Evans. 184 00:10:10,914 --> 00:10:12,547 Borat. 185 00:10:12,582 --> 00:10:15,150 I'm the club secretary of the Naval Military Club. 186 00:10:15,185 --> 00:10:17,819 - Hello. - This is the library. 187 00:10:17,854 --> 00:10:20,122 It's very beautiful room. 188 00:10:20,157 --> 00:10:25,227 Do you ever throw out member? 189 00:10:25,262 --> 00:10:28,130 Um, it has been known to happen, yes. 190 00:10:28,165 --> 00:10:31,400 If a man get very... 191 00:10:31,435 --> 00:10:36,675 drink and do, uh... that. 192 00:10:37,107 --> 00:10:39,808 Oh, no, I don't think we'd allow that at all, no. 193 00:10:39,843 --> 00:10:41,476 - You throw out. - Yes. 194 00:10:41,511 --> 00:10:45,476 And what if a man wants to make love to a man's bottom? 195 00:10:46,381 --> 00:10:47,783 You throw him out? 196 00:10:47,818 --> 00:10:50,519 Uh, we certainly don't approve of that at all. 197 00:10:50,554 --> 00:10:52,854 We think is wrong? 198 00:10:52,889 --> 00:10:54,856 - Maybe is primitive. - We do as well. It's a... 199 00:10:54,891 --> 00:10:57,960 Homosexuality is not encouraged in the club. 200 00:10:57,995 --> 00:11:01,363 - So, gentleman is not homosexual? - Definitely not. 201 00:11:01,398 --> 00:11:03,065 Hello. 202 00:11:03,100 --> 00:11:05,367 - Is nice to meet you. - And you. 203 00:11:05,402 --> 00:11:07,536 And you have been to Stringfellow Club? 204 00:11:07,571 --> 00:11:08,870 No. 205 00:11:08,905 --> 00:11:13,208 It is fun because you have a woman with big, how you say... 206 00:11:13,243 --> 00:11:15,877 - Mammary glands. - Mama? 207 00:11:15,912 --> 00:11:18,046 Mammary glands is the word you're looking for. 208 00:11:18,081 --> 00:11:20,282 - Or breasts. - Breasts. 209 00:11:20,317 --> 00:11:22,084 - Breasts. - Like, tits? 210 00:11:22,119 --> 00:11:24,820 Tits, yes. Not a gentleman's word. 211 00:11:24,855 --> 00:11:27,823 They have girl there stand like this! 212 00:11:27,858 --> 00:11:29,891 I'm sure you have them in Kazakhstan as well? 213 00:11:29,926 --> 00:11:33,829 We have, but they... it's not like this, you know? 214 00:11:33,864 --> 00:11:36,164 Well, you mustn't wrestle them so much. 215 00:11:36,199 --> 00:11:40,168 - Clearly you've made them drop. - A Tajik girl is a very big. 216 00:11:40,203 --> 00:11:42,004 - Oh, so you like those? - The Tajik. 217 00:11:42,039 --> 00:11:44,773 But Uzbeki... tiny, tiny, tiny, tiny. 218 00:11:44,808 --> 00:11:49,344 - Horses for courses. - No, we do not do with a horse. 219 00:11:49,379 --> 00:11:51,513 We do not like with a horse. 220 00:11:51,548 --> 00:11:54,816 - No, I don't think that, no. - It's an expression. 221 00:11:54,851 --> 00:11:57,052 It means that some people like one sort of thing, 222 00:11:57,087 --> 00:11:58,987 - one people like another. - I do not like... 223 00:11:59,022 --> 00:12:00,222 English idiom. 224 00:12:00,257 --> 00:12:03,558 People who like animal to make love is sick. 225 00:12:03,593 --> 00:12:06,563 - Yes, I think you're right. - Yeah, I hear what you meant. 226 00:12:13,402 --> 00:12:17,406 Listen here. I has got none other than me main man, 227 00:12:17,441 --> 00:12:20,443 Sir Rhodes Boyson, in da house. 228 00:12:20,478 --> 00:12:24,046 'Cause we is talking about the education thing. 229 00:12:24,081 --> 00:12:26,015 Let's talk about the discipline. 230 00:12:26,050 --> 00:12:28,584 Do you think, Sir Rhodes, 231 00:12:28,619 --> 00:12:32,321 there is enough discipline in school? 232 00:12:32,356 --> 00:12:36,359 I think there is slightly less than there should be. 233 00:12:36,394 --> 00:12:41,731 - Do you believe kids should be caned? - I do. I have... 234 00:12:41,766 --> 00:12:43,399 - You do? - I do. 235 00:12:43,434 --> 00:12:45,034 - Wicked, man! - I am... 236 00:12:45,069 --> 00:12:47,136 You believe kids should be caned even in school? 237 00:12:47,171 --> 00:12:49,272 - Even in school. - Do you not think, Sir Rhodes, 238 00:12:49,307 --> 00:12:52,275 if you get caned in school, you can't concentrate as well? 239 00:12:52,310 --> 00:12:55,511 'Cause a lot of people out there say that if you're getting caned... 240 00:12:55,546 --> 00:13:00,182 Well, I was caned a time and I've concentrated all my life. 241 00:13:00,217 --> 00:13:02,084 You were caned? Respect, man. 242 00:13:02,119 --> 00:13:04,420 - From that, so they... - Respect. 243 00:13:04,455 --> 00:13:07,523 Yeah, so, I mean, it was... I mean, it shouldn't be done evil 244 00:13:07,558 --> 00:13:12,094 - and it shouldn't be done badly. But it... - You gotta have good stuff. 245 00:13:12,129 --> 00:13:15,564 - You have to have rules in life. - You have to have good cane. 246 00:13:15,599 --> 00:13:17,400 You have to have a good cane. 247 00:13:19,603 --> 00:13:23,472 Do you think porn stars should teach sex education in school? 248 00:13:23,507 --> 00:13:25,675 - No. No. - Why not? 249 00:13:25,710 --> 00:13:32,181 Because I do not respect porn... stars, as you say. 250 00:13:32,216 --> 00:13:34,450 But they has more bonin' experience than anyone else. 251 00:13:34,485 --> 00:13:38,454 Oh yeah. But it is not the experience that I want for our country. 252 00:13:38,489 --> 00:13:40,456 But someone who has had a four header or whatever 253 00:13:40,491 --> 00:13:43,426 will know how to cope with any situation. 254 00:13:43,461 --> 00:13:46,062 Well, I... some of these situations 255 00:13:46,097 --> 00:13:48,164 I wouldn't put myself in for the beginning. 256 00:13:48,199 --> 00:13:50,266 For real. Me feelin' that, Sir Rhodes. 257 00:13:50,301 --> 00:13:51,634 Me feelin' that so strong. 258 00:13:53,905 --> 00:13:57,506 Do you think there should be mixed schools? 259 00:13:57,541 --> 00:13:59,342 I think there should be a choice. 260 00:13:59,377 --> 00:14:02,712 For parents and the pupils themselves. 261 00:14:02,747 --> 00:14:05,348 Do you not think, though, if you have mixed schools, 262 00:14:05,383 --> 00:14:09,018 all the boys will spend all their time chasin' muff 263 00:14:09,053 --> 00:14:12,154 and all the girls will spend all their time preparin' their muff? 264 00:14:12,189 --> 00:14:16,459 No. I think if the school is running properly, 265 00:14:16,494 --> 00:14:18,494 if they're in a well-controlled school, 266 00:14:18,529 --> 00:14:21,197 then it's right. 267 00:14:21,232 --> 00:14:25,735 But me, me got an A-plus in punani, but me failed me exams 268 00:14:25,770 --> 00:14:30,119 'cause me was so into the chasin' the bit of... beaver. 269 00:14:30,439 --> 00:14:34,543 Well, you'll have to... well, that's... that's your fault. 270 00:14:34,578 --> 00:14:38,347 I think overall, single sex schools 271 00:14:38,382 --> 00:14:42,347 work better than mixed schools. 272 00:14:43,052 --> 00:14:45,321 But don't you think single-sex girls' schools, 273 00:14:45,356 --> 00:14:47,757 they just breed, you know, 274 00:14:47,792 --> 00:14:50,092 people who drink from the furry cup? 275 00:14:50,127 --> 00:14:53,529 But never having drunk from the fairy cup, 276 00:14:53,564 --> 00:14:56,298 I don't know what the liquor is in it. 277 00:14:56,333 --> 00:14:59,435 Aii, you know, Sir Rhodes, you know. 278 00:14:59,470 --> 00:15:02,304 You know, dem girls that is drinking from the furry cup, 279 00:15:02,339 --> 00:15:05,274 that like to eat from the bushy plain... 280 00:15:06,410 --> 00:15:07,710 - You know what I is getting at? - Yeah. 281 00:15:07,745 --> 00:15:09,245 Yes, I know what you're getting at. 282 00:15:11,282 --> 00:15:15,351 You is rockin'. Sir Rhodes Boyson in da house. 283 00:15:15,386 --> 00:15:17,653 Booka, booka. Wicked. 284 00:15:17,688 --> 00:15:20,623 You is da man. I wish you was my teacher all them years ago, 285 00:15:20,658 --> 00:15:22,458 and I wouldn't have turned out like dis. 286 00:15:25,730 --> 00:15:26,996 Booyakasha. 287 00:15:34,239 --> 00:15:36,607 Booyakasha. 288 00:15:36,642 --> 00:15:39,310 Charity is well important, innit? 289 00:15:39,345 --> 00:15:44,348 10 year ago, when me was on telly earning 200 quid a week, 290 00:15:44,383 --> 00:15:48,553 me would give back by goin' to disadvantaged parts of town 291 00:15:48,588 --> 00:15:51,222 and bonin' as many girls as me could. 292 00:15:51,257 --> 00:15:54,792 Me didn't discriminate against who would get me charity. 293 00:15:54,827 --> 00:15:57,562 The mentally ill, the slightly overweight, 294 00:15:57,597 --> 00:15:59,530 refugees... nice. 295 00:15:59,565 --> 00:16:03,067 But me drew the line at the physically spasticated. 296 00:16:03,102 --> 00:16:04,669 Another thing me done for charity 297 00:16:04,704 --> 00:16:08,439 was something called "Comic Relief." Check it out! 298 00:16:08,474 --> 00:16:13,377 Big it up for none other than Victoria and David Beckham! 299 00:16:37,168 --> 00:16:39,070 Now, Scary, is you comfy? 300 00:16:41,641 --> 00:16:44,175 - Beckham, what about you? - All right. 301 00:16:44,210 --> 00:16:48,146 - Now, where did you two meet? - We met at the football. 302 00:16:48,181 --> 00:16:50,915 Beckham, was you into the Spice Girls beforehand? 303 00:16:50,950 --> 00:16:53,184 No, but I was into Posh. 304 00:16:53,219 --> 00:16:55,987 Had you ever seen a picture of her and knocked one out? 305 00:17:01,959 --> 00:17:03,661 That's a yes, innit? 306 00:17:03,696 --> 00:17:06,130 Come on, what about that picture of her 307 00:17:06,165 --> 00:17:09,100 in the black catsuit and boots that come up well high? 308 00:17:09,135 --> 00:17:11,369 Apparently in that video, if you freeze-frame it, 309 00:17:11,404 --> 00:17:14,138 you can actually see a tiny bit of camel toe. 310 00:17:14,173 --> 00:17:16,240 - Oh, no! - Ain't that right? 311 00:17:16,275 --> 00:17:18,976 I can see... 312 00:17:19,011 --> 00:17:21,979 Yeah, that's more like a camel hoof, girl. 313 00:17:22,014 --> 00:17:26,184 All right, now, it must be amazing going out with a Spice Girl. 314 00:17:26,219 --> 00:17:30,588 But in an ideal world, and no disrespect to your bitch... 315 00:17:34,327 --> 00:17:38,996 in an ideal world, wouldn't you rather be with Baby? 316 00:17:40,666 --> 00:17:43,167 No. 317 00:17:43,202 --> 00:17:45,970 So how many of the Spice Girls turned you down 318 00:17:46,005 --> 00:17:47,438 before you went for Posh? 319 00:17:48,941 --> 00:17:54,178 - You went for Scary first, what? - No, just this one. 320 00:17:54,213 --> 00:17:57,148 Now, does you go to watch him play football? 321 00:17:57,183 --> 00:17:58,449 Yeah, I do. Whenever I can. 322 00:17:58,484 --> 00:18:00,051 'Cause Brooklyn loves going to watch him, 323 00:18:00,086 --> 00:18:02,019 so as much as we can. 324 00:18:02,054 --> 00:18:06,057 Me heard there is an insulting song that they sing about you. 325 00:18:06,092 --> 00:18:09,126 Has you heard it? What is the words? 326 00:18:09,161 --> 00:18:13,498 They say, "Posh Spice ... takes it up the ass." 327 00:18:13,533 --> 00:18:18,436 - That ... you take it up the ass? - That's what they say. 328 00:18:18,471 --> 00:18:20,104 But that ain't insulting! 329 00:18:20,139 --> 00:18:22,974 That is the biggest compliment you can pay to a woman. 330 00:18:24,076 --> 00:18:27,111 Respect! 331 00:18:27,146 --> 00:18:30,147 No, but seriously, does you take it up the butty? 332 00:18:32,051 --> 00:18:33,551 No, of course I don't. 333 00:18:33,586 --> 00:18:36,153 Beckham, you telling me you ain't never been caught offside? 334 00:18:39,458 --> 00:18:43,194 Now, Beckham, do you reckon the better the footballer you is, 335 00:18:43,229 --> 00:18:47,198 - the fitter the girl you go out with? - Obviously. 336 00:18:47,233 --> 00:18:52,136 So you is the best at footie, you know? So you get Posh. 337 00:18:52,171 --> 00:18:57,508 So does Sporty Spice go out with someone from Scumford United? 338 00:18:57,543 --> 00:19:00,645 - That's horrible! - You's got a little nipper. 339 00:19:00,680 --> 00:19:03,147 Do you reckon you is good parents? 340 00:19:03,182 --> 00:19:05,449 Yeah. I do think we're good parents. 341 00:19:05,484 --> 00:19:07,952 So when did you teach him to roll his first spliff? 342 00:19:10,089 --> 00:19:11,923 I will never teach him that. 343 00:19:11,958 --> 00:19:15,159 Why not? You should never deny your kid education. 344 00:19:17,063 --> 00:19:19,063 - So, what's he called? - Brooklyn. 345 00:19:19,098 --> 00:19:21,232 All right. And how did you come up with that name? 346 00:19:23,469 --> 00:19:26,037 Well, we found out that I was pregnant while we was... 347 00:19:26,072 --> 00:19:28,372 while I was on tour in America. 348 00:19:28,407 --> 00:19:30,341 And we was in Brooklyn when we found out. 349 00:19:30,376 --> 00:19:32,043 So, had you actually done it there? 350 00:19:32,078 --> 00:19:35,046 - No, we didn't do it there. - Oh, for real? 351 00:19:35,081 --> 00:19:37,915 We did it in Denmark, if you really want to know. 352 00:19:37,950 --> 00:19:40,117 So how come you never called him Denmark? 353 00:19:42,021 --> 00:19:44,188 That would be a well good idea, though, what? 354 00:19:44,223 --> 00:19:47,959 'Cause if me and me Julie had a kid, we'd call him Langley Village. 355 00:19:49,962 --> 00:19:51,529 Well, his full name would be 356 00:19:51,564 --> 00:19:54,899 the Bogs in the KFC in Langley Village. 357 00:19:56,936 --> 00:19:59,136 So tell me, does Brooklyn like your music 358 00:19:59,171 --> 00:20:00,104 or is he getting a bit old for it now? 359 00:20:04,942 --> 00:20:06,344 He does like music. 360 00:20:06,379 --> 00:20:09,246 He's really, you know, he jigs about and dances. 361 00:20:09,281 --> 00:20:11,082 He's also into football as well. So it's nice. 362 00:20:11,117 --> 00:20:13,584 - Respect. - A footballer with rhythm. 363 00:20:13,619 --> 00:20:15,019 So tell me, is your little boy 364 00:20:15,054 --> 00:20:17,088 starting to put whole sentences together? 365 00:20:17,123 --> 00:20:19,890 He's saying little bits and pieces, yeah. 366 00:20:19,925 --> 00:20:21,058 And what about Brooklyn? 367 00:20:23,496 --> 00:20:28,165 - That was Brooklyn! - All right. Okay. 368 00:20:28,200 --> 00:20:32,136 So, do you want him to grow up to be a footballer like his dad 369 00:20:32,171 --> 00:20:34,939 or a singer like Mariah Carey? 370 00:20:38,544 --> 00:20:42,079 Well, I am hoping that he will grow up to be a footballer like his dad 371 00:20:42,114 --> 00:20:45,316 and I'd like to grow up and be a singer like Mariah Carey. 372 00:20:45,351 --> 00:20:48,486 Respect. 373 00:20:48,521 --> 00:20:50,354 We has gotta have a break now 374 00:20:50,389 --> 00:20:53,457 'cause Posh is gonna do a bit of breast-feeding backstage. 375 00:20:55,127 --> 00:20:58,329 Just out of interest, is there one going spare? 376 00:21:00,232 --> 00:21:01,598 Check you laters. 377 00:21:02,723 --> 00:21:06,207 sync & correction by f1nc0 ~ Addic7ed.com ~