1 00:00:02,480 --> 00:00:06,480 {\an1}This programme contains very strong language. 2 00:00:06,480 --> 00:00:10,520 {\an1} You know that thing about twins, how, like, you feel the same shit, 3 00:00:10,520 --> 00:00:14,240 {\an1} one twin will feel what the other twin's feeling? 4 00:00:14,240 --> 00:00:20,680 {\an1} I know that's true because when we were little, me and Nathe, we were in Big W with Mum, right? 5 00:00:20,680 --> 00:00:24,760 {\an1} We lost Nathe, so me and Mum were looking for him, right? 6 00:00:24,760 --> 00:00:28,600 {\an1} And I felt this kind of wet patch here in my undies. 7 00:00:28,600 --> 00:00:32,520 {\an1} I said to Mum, "Shit! Nathe's pissed his pants. 8 00:00:32,520 --> 00:00:36,720 {\an1} "I don't know where he is, but he's pissed his pants, definitely." 9 00:00:36,720 --> 00:00:39,560 {\an1} When we found him, he'd pissed his pants. 10 00:00:39,560 --> 00:00:42,440 {\an1}Daniel, are you ready? Do the punch! 11 00:00:42,440 --> 00:00:45,480 {\an1} 'So, we're going to put Nathe outside...' 12 00:00:45,480 --> 00:00:48,960 {\an1} Do you feel anything? No. It didn't hurt. 13 00:00:48,960 --> 00:00:53,160 {\an1} '..have me inside and do shit to him, then see if I feel it.' 14 00:00:55,240 --> 00:00:58,920 {\an1}What about that, Dan? Your arm hurt? Nah. Nothing. 15 00:00:58,920 --> 00:01:02,320 {\an1} What's that for? Boiling water to pour on him. 16 00:01:02,320 --> 00:01:06,200 {\an1} 'They reckon it works with your sense of smell.' 17 00:01:06,200 --> 00:01:09,000 {\an1}Hey, Dan. Do you smell any dog shit? 18 00:01:09,680 --> 00:01:12,120 {\an1} No. I can't smell anything. 19 00:01:12,120 --> 00:01:16,320 {\an1} 'And they reckon it works with your sense of horniness.' 20 00:01:16,320 --> 00:01:19,360 {\an1}Yeah. Hey, Dan. You got a stiffy? 21 00:01:19,360 --> 00:01:21,320 {\an1} No. 22 00:01:22,840 --> 00:01:26,480 {\an1} It's not working. Try the pain one again. 23 00:01:27,680 --> 00:01:30,280 {\an1}Argh! Fuck off! 24 00:01:30,280 --> 00:01:32,720 {\an1} Come back, arsehole. Nathan! 25 00:01:32,720 --> 00:01:35,640 {\an1}He's pissed-off with you! 26 00:01:35,640 --> 00:01:38,120 {\an1} I'm fucking pissed-off with him. 27 00:01:38,120 --> 00:01:41,880 {\an1} Actually, that kind of works. Twins both pissed-off. 28 00:01:41,880 --> 00:01:46,360 {\an1}Oh, yeah. So it does work. Same feelings. Fuck, yes! 29 00:01:46,360 --> 00:01:50,320 {\an1} I knew that would work. Fuck! Let's go and tell Mum. 30 00:02:34,960 --> 00:02:37,000 {\an1} 10,000 people seated... 31 00:02:37,000 --> 00:02:41,200 {\an1} 'Today has brought some very big news. 32 00:02:41,200 --> 00:02:44,920 {\an1} 'Some news that's exciting me beyond recognition.' 33 00:02:44,920 --> 00:02:48,560 {\an1} Tim is going to be honoured at the Tokyo X Games 34 00:02:48,560 --> 00:02:50,960 {\an1} for his 16th birthday celebration. 35 00:02:50,960 --> 00:02:54,720 {\an1} Inflatable you is going to come down from the stadium... 36 00:02:54,720 --> 00:02:57,760 {\an1} 'I can't believe he's going to be 16.' 37 00:02:57,760 --> 00:03:02,160 {\an1} It seems like yesterday he was sucking on my breast. 38 00:03:02,160 --> 00:03:04,400 {\an1} You come up, you flip, 39 00:03:04,400 --> 00:03:08,800 {\an1} you do the 900, then you come down, crowd cheer and sing Happy Birthday. 40 00:03:08,800 --> 00:03:13,360 {\an1}Wait. I can't just do the 900. You know how much practice that takes? 41 00:03:13,360 --> 00:03:15,360 {\an1} Be confident in yourself. 42 00:03:15,360 --> 00:03:19,040 {\an1} 'The Tokyo X Games is the biggest skateboarding event.' 43 00:03:19,040 --> 00:03:23,720 {\an1} Tim, shut up and watch him, please. Your mum has worked so hard. 44 00:03:23,720 --> 00:03:28,000 {\an1} 'Tim has been very snappy with me lately. He's not been himself. 45 00:03:28,000 --> 00:03:30,120 {\an1} 'He's become very aggressive.' 46 00:03:30,120 --> 00:03:36,720 {\an1} I can't do it in three weeks. You'd better cos if you stuff it up, you'll look like a dickhead. 47 00:03:36,720 --> 00:03:41,760 {\an1} 'I told Tim, "You have every opportunity, but you're being a prat."' 48 00:03:41,760 --> 00:03:43,800 {\an1} Less chat, more practice. 49 00:03:43,800 --> 00:03:47,280 {\an1} 'Tim lost a few skateboarding competitions lately. 50 00:03:47,280 --> 00:03:49,320 {\an1} 'His skating is not as good. 51 00:03:49,320 --> 00:03:53,040 {\an1} 'It's very worrying for me, as a mother.' 52 00:03:53,040 --> 00:03:55,080 {\an1} You stuffed it up. Do it again. 53 00:03:55,080 --> 00:03:59,640 {\an1} 'He's not concentrating with school work, falling asleep sometimes.' 54 00:03:59,640 --> 00:04:01,680 {\an1} We're all tired, Tim! 55 00:04:01,680 --> 00:04:03,960 {\an1} 'I called my best friend' 56 00:04:03,960 --> 00:04:06,360 {\an1} who has a teenage son as well. 57 00:04:06,360 --> 00:04:08,800 {\an1} She said that it's growing pains. 58 00:04:08,800 --> 00:04:11,440 {\an1} They say that the 15-year-olds... 59 00:04:11,440 --> 00:04:16,720 {\an1} The cock stop growing at 15 for the boys, but the rest of them keep growing. 60 00:04:16,720 --> 00:04:23,840 {\an1} So, for Tim, he's 15. His cock is fully grown but the rest of him has got a lot of growing to do. 61 00:04:23,840 --> 00:04:26,280 {\an1} Get up! You've got work to do. 62 00:04:26,280 --> 00:04:28,920 {\an1} 'We got the Oshi Cola campaign 63 00:04:28,920 --> 00:04:33,160 {\an1} 'and we have an animated cartoon series, based on Tim. 64 00:04:33,160 --> 00:04:35,720 {\an1} 'Tim's doing the voice for that. 65 00:04:35,720 --> 00:04:38,360 {\an1} 'If he don't get his shit together,' 66 00:04:38,360 --> 00:04:41,840 {\an1} then we're all stuffed big-time. 67 00:04:54,000 --> 00:04:57,160 {\an1} Well, today, I gotta do my community service. 68 00:04:57,160 --> 00:05:02,640 {\an1} Cos I got into a little altercation with Lasquisha on account of her 69 00:05:02,640 --> 00:05:04,840 {\an1} taking out a restraining order. 70 00:05:04,840 --> 00:05:07,720 {\an1} 'They sent me out to an elementary school.' 71 00:05:07,720 --> 00:05:11,400 {\an1} You get more flow, see what I'm saying? 72 00:05:11,400 --> 00:05:14,560 {\an1} 'Saying at the kids, "This is right. This is wrong." 73 00:05:14,560 --> 00:05:18,120 {\an1} 'Inspiring them. Being a role model to them.' 74 00:05:18,120 --> 00:05:22,320 {\an1} I'm asking this dude if he can take it off. Baby, it can't come off. 75 00:05:22,320 --> 00:05:25,200 {\an1} Why? I'm not going anywhere. No. 76 00:05:25,200 --> 00:05:31,480 {\an1} 'This performance today is the first chance ever for the world to see the new me.' 77 00:05:31,480 --> 00:05:35,120 {\an1} They goin' wild. They ready to party. 78 00:05:35,120 --> 00:05:39,960 {\an1}We have for you, boys and girls, a very special guest 79 00:05:39,960 --> 00:05:43,480 {\an1}to teach you all a valuable lesson about right and wrong. 80 00:05:43,480 --> 00:05:47,080 {\an1}It's the pop star, S.mouse. "Smoose"? 81 00:05:48,920 --> 00:05:51,760 {\an1} Oh...yeah. 82 00:05:51,760 --> 00:05:54,000 {\an1} Wassup, motherfuckers! 83 00:05:54,000 --> 00:05:57,480 {\an1} This is S dot mouse, exclamation mark! 84 00:05:57,480 --> 00:06:00,720 {\an1} Are you ready to slap your elbows? 85 00:06:00,720 --> 00:06:03,520 {\an1} HE RAPS Slap my elbows! You do it like this! 86 00:06:03,520 --> 00:06:07,360 {\an1} 'I'm goin' to start with Slap My Elbows to ease them in. 87 00:06:07,360 --> 00:06:09,800 {\an1} 'I don't want to freak them out.' 88 00:06:09,800 --> 00:06:12,160 {\an1} Then hit 'em with some of my new shit! 89 00:06:12,160 --> 00:06:14,800 {\an1} Five divided by six equals 90 00:06:14,800 --> 00:06:18,160 {\an1} My intellectality 91 00:06:18,160 --> 00:06:21,400 {\an1} E equals MC square, motherfuckers... 92 00:06:21,400 --> 00:06:26,520 {\an1} 'You know what? I'm here today to teach the kids right from wrong. 93 00:06:26,520 --> 00:06:29,320 {\an1} 'So I wrote a new song especially for today.' 94 00:06:29,320 --> 00:06:34,040 {\an1} That song is teaching the kids about the dangers of the world out there. 95 00:06:34,040 --> 00:06:39,680 {\an1} Cos if you're a kid, there's nothing more dangerous in the world than a paedophile. 96 00:06:39,680 --> 00:06:42,080 {\an1} Hot children lookin' at children. 97 00:06:42,080 --> 00:06:44,880 {\an1} Hot children, think about 98 00:06:44,880 --> 00:06:49,720 {\an1} When you're walkin' home alone, kids And you see a scary man 99 00:06:49,720 --> 00:06:54,680 {\an1} Don't look him in the eye, kids Don't get in his bed 100 00:06:54,680 --> 00:06:58,400 {\an1} Cos he's checkin' you out, kids He likes your style 101 00:06:58,400 --> 00:07:00,040 {\an1} He likes your style 102 00:07:00,040 --> 00:07:02,880 {\an1} Cos he's a big fat motherfucking paedophile... 103 00:07:02,880 --> 00:07:09,200 {\an1} 'If I can use my talent to be able to entertain as well as educate' 104 00:07:09,200 --> 00:07:12,120 {\an1} then, man, that's gotta be a good thing. 105 00:07:12,120 --> 00:07:15,880 {\an1} ..Cos all the bad guys, they're checkin' you out, yeah! 106 00:07:28,680 --> 00:07:32,360 {\an1} Guys, Steve's here. Hey, guys. Look at this. 107 00:07:33,760 --> 00:07:36,120 {\an1}Oh, yeah! 108 00:07:36,120 --> 00:07:39,640 {\an1} 'Steve's been sucking up to us heaps. Bought us a Wii.' 109 00:07:39,640 --> 00:07:42,480 {\an1} Wiis are for fags. 110 00:07:42,480 --> 00:07:44,320 {\an1} 'I reckon it's shit.' 111 00:07:44,320 --> 00:07:47,200 {\an1} I'm not playing it. It's a fag game. 112 00:07:47,200 --> 00:07:50,600 {\an1} 'Cos Steve's marrying Mum, he's trying to get on my good side.' 113 00:07:50,600 --> 00:07:55,680 {\an1} So he's doing all this shit and trying to get involved in my life. 114 00:07:55,680 --> 00:07:58,120 {\an1} I don't want him involved in my life. 115 00:07:58,120 --> 00:08:02,120 {\an1} We can all play at the same time. If you're a fag. 116 00:08:02,120 --> 00:08:06,040 {\an1} He called me fucking Danny! I said, "Don't fucking call me Danny!" 117 00:08:06,040 --> 00:08:08,080 {\an1} Enjoy it. 118 00:08:08,080 --> 00:08:10,400 {\an1} I won't be. 119 00:08:10,400 --> 00:08:14,400 {\an1} 'The even shitter thing is that his son, Kayden, his three-year-old,' 120 00:08:14,400 --> 00:08:19,680 {\an1} is coming to stay every second weekend cos Steve gets custody. 121 00:08:19,680 --> 00:08:24,920 {\an1} 'I end up having to deal with a three-year-old, which is shit.' 122 00:08:24,920 --> 00:08:27,160 {\an1} Can you say, "I like bum"? 123 00:08:27,160 --> 00:08:30,840 {\an1} I like bum. Oh, do ya? Do you really?! 124 00:08:30,840 --> 00:08:32,840 {\an1} You confessed it! 125 00:08:32,840 --> 00:08:35,280 {\an1} Come here, fuck-offs. Come here, fuck-offs. 126 00:08:35,280 --> 00:08:39,760 {\an1}Daniel, be responsible. He's only three! 127 00:08:39,760 --> 00:08:42,200 {\an1} Go, "My dad is gay." 128 00:08:42,200 --> 00:08:44,240 {\an1}My dad is gay. 129 00:08:44,240 --> 00:08:47,280 {\an1} Say it louder so he can hear. He's over there. 130 00:08:47,280 --> 00:08:50,520 {\an1} Steve, Kayden wants to tell you something. My dad is gay. 131 00:08:50,520 --> 00:08:53,040 {\an1} LAUGHING: Hey, Steve. 132 00:08:53,040 --> 00:08:55,840 {\an1} You're a big fag. Go. 133 00:08:55,840 --> 00:08:58,840 {\an1}Hey, Steve. You're a big fag. 134 00:08:58,840 --> 00:09:01,720 {\an1} Oh, Steve! Stevo! 135 00:09:01,720 --> 00:09:05,120 {\an1} Did you hear that? Is your dad straight or gay? 136 00:09:05,120 --> 00:09:09,240 {\an1} Gay. Oh, Stevo! Kayden reckons you're gay! 137 00:09:09,240 --> 00:09:11,880 {\an1} 'Mum's been on my back about swearing.' 138 00:09:11,880 --> 00:09:13,920 {\an1} She reckons I swear too much. 139 00:09:13,920 --> 00:09:19,560 {\an1} She reckons I use the word "fag" heaps, like I'm always calling people fags. 140 00:09:19,560 --> 00:09:21,520 {\an1} Mum, Tyson's being a fag. 141 00:09:21,520 --> 00:09:23,360 {\an1} These are for fags. 142 00:09:23,360 --> 00:09:25,480 {\an1} This toast is fagging. 143 00:09:25,480 --> 00:09:29,960 {\an1}Daniel, if you say the word "fag" or call anyone a fag again... 144 00:09:29,960 --> 00:09:34,200 {\an1} 'And she said, as a threat, if I keep saying "fag",' 145 00:09:34,200 --> 00:09:40,480 {\an1} she's going to make me spend a whole day with Henry Ketties, this actual teenage homo. 146 00:09:40,480 --> 00:09:44,760 {\an1}One day with Henry Ketties, getting to know each other. Yeah, yeah. 147 00:09:44,760 --> 00:09:46,840 {\an1} 'He goes to my school.' 148 00:09:46,840 --> 00:09:50,880 {\an1} Mum's friends with his mum and, like, she's arranged it. 149 00:09:50,880 --> 00:09:53,880 {\an1} Oi, Nathe! Nathan, you fag! 150 00:09:53,880 --> 00:09:57,760 {\an1} Will you take Kayden outside...? That's it! What? 151 00:09:57,760 --> 00:10:02,040 {\an1}You said "fag". Sorry(!) I mean it. I am going to do it. 152 00:10:02,040 --> 00:10:05,560 {\an1} Sorry. I'm going to call them right now. 153 00:10:07,720 --> 00:10:09,720 {\an1} Fuck off, you fag! 154 00:10:09,720 --> 00:10:12,240 {\an1} It's your fucking fault. 155 00:10:15,320 --> 00:10:17,920 {\an1} Tim, hurry up, please. 156 00:10:17,920 --> 00:10:23,600 {\an1} 'I took Tim to the doctor to find out what the hell is going wrong with him. 157 00:10:23,600 --> 00:10:27,840 {\an1} 'The doctor said he over-worked and a little bit depressed.' 158 00:10:27,840 --> 00:10:31,320 {\an1} That's why he's being so tired and annoying lately. 159 00:10:31,320 --> 00:10:38,600 {\an1} I said to the doctor, "How you get depression living in a place like this?" I don't understand it. 160 00:10:38,600 --> 00:10:42,800 {\an1} When I was a young girl, I used to have to take a shit in the rain 161 00:10:42,800 --> 00:10:45,240 {\an1} in front of the neighbours. 162 00:10:45,240 --> 00:10:47,160 {\an1} That's depressing. 163 00:10:47,160 --> 00:10:51,000 {\an1} Everyone has to be nice to Tim. He's got depression. 164 00:10:51,000 --> 00:10:56,440 {\an1} 'Tim needs to realise the bottom line is if he can't handle the pressure' 165 00:10:56,440 --> 00:10:58,720 {\an1} the company is going to the tubes. 166 00:10:58,720 --> 00:11:02,760 {\an1} Go to your room. I have to practise. I want you to relax. 167 00:11:02,760 --> 00:11:06,920 {\an1} 'I have come up with a few plans to relieve the pressure.' 168 00:11:06,920 --> 00:11:12,160 {\an1} Go tug yourself off or something. Whatever you need to do to relieve yourself. 169 00:11:12,160 --> 00:11:16,960 {\an1} 'I'm also going to take over some of his responsibilities.' 170 00:11:16,960 --> 00:11:21,800 {\an1} Bruce and I have been thinking how we can get you less depressed. 171 00:11:21,800 --> 00:11:26,200 {\an1} Number one, I'm going to do the voice of Tim for the cartoon. What? 172 00:11:26,200 --> 00:11:31,040 {\an1} I'm doing your voice. That's sorted. No. I want to do it myself. 173 00:11:31,040 --> 00:11:35,280 {\an1} Tim, I'm good at voices. I don't want you doing it. That's weird. 174 00:11:35,280 --> 00:11:37,320 {\an1} I can sound like you. 175 00:11:37,320 --> 00:11:42,000 {\an1} SQUEAKY: "I'm Tim and I'm gay." That doesn't sound anything like me. 176 00:11:42,000 --> 00:11:46,240 {\an1} You're in denial if you think you don't sound like that. 177 00:11:46,240 --> 00:11:50,480 {\an1} You have an annoying squeaky voice. I don't want you doing it. Shut up. 178 00:11:50,480 --> 00:11:53,240 {\an1} Also, Bruce, if you could show, please. 179 00:11:53,240 --> 00:11:56,800 {\an1} Bruce and I have decided, for relaxation purposes, 180 00:11:56,800 --> 00:11:59,400 {\an1} we are going to get you a dog. 181 00:11:59,400 --> 00:12:03,280 {\an1} A shar pei. They are very relaxing. A little puppy. 182 00:12:03,280 --> 00:12:08,120 {\an1} I don't want one. We want you to become best friends and teach it to skate. 183 00:12:08,120 --> 00:12:13,640 {\an1} I was thinking that the dog could become a nice plush toy for the Gay Style range. 184 00:12:13,640 --> 00:12:17,680 {\an1} Sold separately or maybe on a cute little Gay Style skateboard. 185 00:12:17,680 --> 00:12:21,800 {\an1}I don't want a dog for that reason. You've got mild depression, Tim. 186 00:12:21,800 --> 00:12:26,240 {\an1} Dog's going to help that, so we will be getting you a dog... 187 00:12:26,240 --> 00:12:31,200 {\an1} 'Tim, he always fight against me, but now I feel better, in a way, 188 00:12:31,200 --> 00:12:34,200 {\an1} 'to know that it's because of depression.' 189 00:12:34,200 --> 00:12:38,760 {\an1} Tim? Just wanting to give you privacy in your relaxing time. 190 00:12:38,760 --> 00:12:44,720 {\an1} I just wanted to let you know that Cho used to work in a rub and tug place. 191 00:12:44,720 --> 00:12:49,400 {\an1} So if you need someone to come and give you a rub and tug, she come in. 192 00:12:49,400 --> 00:12:51,440 {\an1} It's very relaxing. 193 00:12:51,440 --> 00:12:53,880 {\an1}No! OK. 194 00:12:55,680 --> 00:12:57,600 {\an1} He said no. 195 00:13:03,880 --> 00:13:05,840 {\an1} I don't know. 196 00:13:05,840 --> 00:13:09,920 {\an1} I just wasn't feeling the vibe from those kids, know what I'm saying? 197 00:13:09,920 --> 00:13:12,960 {\an1} I don't think they were feeling my new shit. 198 00:13:12,960 --> 00:13:16,840 {\an1} I'm pretty sure someone recognised you, man. 199 00:13:16,840 --> 00:13:20,080 {\an1} Recognised me? Course they recognised me. 200 00:13:20,080 --> 00:13:24,200 {\an1}They didn't know who you were cos everyone's starting to forget you. 201 00:13:24,200 --> 00:13:28,200 {\an1} Shut. It's a simple fact. You've been locked up. 202 00:13:28,200 --> 00:13:32,800 {\an1} I only been locked up for two months. They forget me that quick? 203 00:13:32,800 --> 00:13:36,120 {\an1} That's all it takes. They forget shit quickly, man. 204 00:13:36,120 --> 00:13:41,080 {\an1} You don't forget a classic song. That shit's gonna be around for history. 205 00:13:41,080 --> 00:13:47,280 {\an1} They might have missed it. By the time you're out of here, you'll be forgotten. Period. 206 00:13:47,280 --> 00:13:50,760 {\an1} What the fuck? Forgotten? Yes. 207 00:13:50,760 --> 00:13:54,640 {\an1} If we went to the mall right now, I would get mobbed. 208 00:13:54,640 --> 00:14:00,680 {\an1} That's how motherfucking famous I am. You go and I kick your ass. You're under arrest. 209 00:14:00,680 --> 00:14:03,520 {\an1} You wanna go to the mall? 210 00:14:03,520 --> 00:14:06,400 {\an1} Your IQ is about the size of your dick! 211 00:14:06,400 --> 00:14:08,440 {\an1} Seven! 212 00:14:08,440 --> 00:14:11,480 {\an1} Goddamn it! How do you deal with him? Seven? 213 00:14:11,480 --> 00:14:16,600 {\an1} You go to that mall, you got to be the stupidest motherfucker I ever met. 214 00:14:16,600 --> 00:14:20,000 {\an1} Hey, Dad. You need anything from the mall? 215 00:14:20,000 --> 00:14:24,400 {\an1} Kiss my ass, motherfuckers. Keep your ass here. Quit being stupid. 216 00:14:27,080 --> 00:14:30,360 {\an1} Where my kids at? Yeah. I'm at the mall! 217 00:14:30,360 --> 00:14:33,440 {\an1} Film this, motherfucker. Yeah, yeah. You got this? 218 00:14:33,440 --> 00:14:37,880 {\an1} This is S.mouse kicking it at the mall. You know what I'm saying? 219 00:14:37,880 --> 00:14:41,760 {\an1} Normally I wouldn't come without security any more. 220 00:14:41,760 --> 00:14:45,800 {\an1} In a minute, you'll see why I don't come without security. Yeah. 221 00:14:45,800 --> 00:14:48,040 {\an1} Let's go meet my fans! 222 00:14:48,040 --> 00:14:50,840 {\an1} Yo! We wanna buy some shit! 223 00:14:50,840 --> 00:14:54,120 {\an1} You wanna close the store off, or what? 224 00:14:54,120 --> 00:14:55,960 {\an1} Yeah, yeah. 225 00:14:55,960 --> 00:14:59,600 {\an1} You asking for trouble if you don't close the store off. 226 00:14:59,600 --> 00:15:03,360 {\an1} Gonna be a lot of fans in here soon. Yeah. 227 00:15:03,360 --> 00:15:05,720 {\an1}GIRLS SCREAM 228 00:15:05,720 --> 00:15:10,640 {\an1} Here we go. No. She dropped her fucking ice cream, ass-hole. 229 00:15:10,640 --> 00:15:14,040 {\an1}Excuse me. Do you guys know him? No. 230 00:15:14,040 --> 00:15:16,040 {\an1} Not EVERYONE knows me. 231 00:15:16,040 --> 00:15:18,320 {\an1}Do you guys know him? 232 00:15:18,320 --> 00:15:20,120 {\an1}No? 233 00:15:20,120 --> 00:15:22,920 {\an1}Excuse me, ma'am. Do you know who he is? 234 00:15:22,920 --> 00:15:28,080 {\an1} Nobody knows you! Wrong age group, motherfucker. My fans aren't grandmas! 235 00:15:28,080 --> 00:15:31,680 {\an1}Familiar with him? No. Shut the fuck up! 236 00:15:31,680 --> 00:15:33,720 {\an1} You filming this shit? 237 00:15:33,720 --> 00:15:38,600 {\an1} Here I am with my real fans. One, two, three, four fans. Yeah. 238 00:15:38,600 --> 00:15:40,680 {\an1}Yeah. Real fans(!) 239 00:15:40,680 --> 00:15:46,360 {\an1} My little sister was obsessed with you ages ago. A lot of girls obsessed with me. 240 00:15:46,360 --> 00:15:52,200 {\an1} You say hi to your little sister for me. Yeah. You know my name? What's my name? 241 00:15:52,200 --> 00:15:55,480 {\an1} ALL: Smouse. Smouse! They all know my name. 242 00:15:55,480 --> 00:15:59,120 {\an1} One two three, say my name. ALL: Smouse! 243 00:15:59,120 --> 00:16:03,400 {\an1} Yeah, yeah. You got that. You know my songs. What songs do you know? 244 00:16:03,400 --> 00:16:06,640 {\an1} Um... You know a lot? You wanna hear some new shit? 245 00:16:06,640 --> 00:16:09,640 {\an1} Play some new shit for them. Press play. 246 00:16:09,640 --> 00:16:12,280 {\an1} I got a lotta new tracks. 247 00:16:12,280 --> 00:16:15,360 {\an1} I got some smooth tracks. This one, you hear that? 248 00:16:15,360 --> 00:16:17,480 {\an1}MUSIC STARTS 249 00:16:17,480 --> 00:16:19,840 {\an1} How that song making you feel? 250 00:16:21,680 --> 00:16:24,320 {\an1} Yeah, the new shit. 251 00:16:24,320 --> 00:16:26,760 {\an1}Our mums are, like, waiting. 252 00:16:26,760 --> 00:16:30,200 {\an1} You gotta go, yeah, you go. Go, go, go. 253 00:16:30,200 --> 00:16:34,600 {\an1} You can't leave your ma waiting. When you gotta go, you gotta go. 254 00:16:34,600 --> 00:16:37,760 {\an1} You don't leave that shit on there. Pick that up. 255 00:16:37,760 --> 00:16:40,360 {\an1} Excuse me! Hi. 256 00:16:40,360 --> 00:16:43,480 {\an1} Are you from High School Musical? No. Oh. 257 00:16:44,440 --> 00:16:46,640 {\an1} Motherfucker! 258 00:16:46,640 --> 00:16:48,680 {\an1} Did you fucking hear that? 259 00:16:48,680 --> 00:16:50,920 {\an1} Don't you fucking laugh! 260 00:16:53,760 --> 00:16:58,680 {\an1} 'Well, it's really shit, cos I kept saying the word "fag", 261 00:16:58,680 --> 00:17:02,880 {\an1} 'my mum's making me spend the whole day with Henry Ketties.' 262 00:17:02,880 --> 00:17:06,960 {\an1} Daniel, Henry's here. Thanks. He's an actual homo from my school. 263 00:17:06,960 --> 00:17:09,440 {\an1} Hey, Daniel. What's up? Hey. 264 00:17:09,440 --> 00:17:15,440 {\an1} Mum's trying to make me realise that it's offensive to fags if you call them fags. 265 00:17:15,440 --> 00:17:20,360 {\an1} 'It's shit cos I've pretty much got nothing in common with him.' 266 00:17:20,360 --> 00:17:22,680 {\an1} It's not going to be fun. 267 00:17:24,840 --> 00:17:26,840 {\an1}Daniel, where's Henry? 268 00:17:26,840 --> 00:17:31,520 {\an1} I don't know. Outside, I s'pose. Well get out there with him. 269 00:17:31,520 --> 00:17:33,880 {\an1}He's your guest. He's a fa...! 270 00:17:34,960 --> 00:17:37,640 {\an1}Daniel, you watch it. 271 00:17:38,840 --> 00:17:40,880 {\an1} All right. 272 00:17:46,560 --> 00:17:49,600 {\an1} You guys still got the motorbikes? Yeah. 273 00:17:51,640 --> 00:17:53,680 {\an1} Cool. 274 00:17:57,080 --> 00:17:59,160 {\an1} You into footie? 275 00:18:03,080 --> 00:18:07,120 {\an1} I saw you at that gig. It was pretty cool, yeah? 276 00:18:07,120 --> 00:18:10,760 {\an1} Yeah, it was all right. Pretty all-right band. 277 00:18:10,760 --> 00:18:15,120 {\an1} Some decent chicks there. Do you mean Rose and Jessie? 278 00:18:16,120 --> 00:18:18,840 {\an1} Yeah. They're really good friends of mine. 279 00:18:18,840 --> 00:18:22,440 {\an1} Oh, really? Yeah... Hi, Nathan. 280 00:18:23,720 --> 00:18:27,560 {\an1} Your brother's so nice. He's pretty cute, too. 281 00:18:31,120 --> 00:18:35,320 {\an1} Daniel, how tall are you? I reckon we're about the same height. 282 00:18:35,320 --> 00:18:37,960 {\an1} Check it out. Stand back-to-back. 283 00:18:37,960 --> 00:18:41,800 {\an1} Come on. Hey, Miss Sims. Who's taller? Me or Daniel? 284 00:18:41,800 --> 00:18:43,800 {\an1}Daniel. 285 00:18:43,800 --> 00:18:46,280 {\an1} Fuck off, you fag! Daniel! 286 00:18:46,280 --> 00:18:48,480 {\an1} He's taking a fucking photo of me! 287 00:18:48,480 --> 00:18:53,880 {\an1}Daniel, why don't you go out and ride the bikes, have a look around the farm? 288 00:18:53,880 --> 00:18:56,440 {\an1}Mum, you're not letting me do what I want. 289 00:18:56,440 --> 00:19:01,120 {\an1} I'm doing what is best for you, Tim. Then let me go. No. 290 00:19:01,120 --> 00:19:03,560 {\an1} 'It has been a roller coaster ride,' 291 00:19:03,560 --> 00:19:06,880 {\an1} dealing with Tim and his tiredness and depression. 292 00:19:06,880 --> 00:19:08,880 {\an1} He's been very difficult. 293 00:19:08,880 --> 00:19:11,080 {\an1} We had a big fight this morning. 294 00:19:11,080 --> 00:19:15,400 {\an1}I want to hang out with my friends. I locked the door. Give me the key. 295 00:19:15,400 --> 00:19:17,760 {\an1} 'Tim, he think he grown-up. 296 00:19:17,760 --> 00:19:19,800 {\an1} 'He not a man. He 15.' 297 00:19:19,800 --> 00:19:23,880 {\an1} Don't you physically abuse me, Tim. You're making your sister cry. 298 00:19:23,880 --> 00:19:29,560 {\an1} 'Tim need to know I have his best interests in my heart.' 299 00:19:29,560 --> 00:19:32,240 {\an1} All I want is for Tim to be happy. 300 00:19:32,240 --> 00:19:34,640 {\an1} What more would a mother want? 301 00:19:34,640 --> 00:19:37,080 {\an1} Tim, we have a surprise for you. 302 00:19:37,080 --> 00:19:39,920 {\an1} We got your cartoon series. They send the DVD. 303 00:19:39,920 --> 00:19:45,400 {\an1} 'Everything I do is to make a good life for Tim. It's all for Tim.' 304 00:19:47,240 --> 00:19:51,280 {\an1} SQUEAKY: 'I'm gay! Hey! This is Tim Okazaki. 305 00:19:51,280 --> 00:19:53,760 {\an1} 'Welcome to my fantasy skate world. 306 00:19:53,760 --> 00:19:57,600 {\an1} 'This park is hard core - gay style!' 307 00:19:58,400 --> 00:20:02,040 {\an1} JINGLE # Hard core, breaking the rules 308 00:20:02,040 --> 00:20:04,480 {\an1} # Mad skater, I play the fool 309 00:20:04,480 --> 00:20:06,600 {\an1} # Grinding away 310 00:20:06,600 --> 00:20:09,200 {\an1} # Get out of my way Cos I'm gay 311 00:20:10,200 --> 00:20:13,000 {\an1} # Get out of my way Cos I'm gay! # 312 00:20:13,000 --> 00:20:16,320 {\an1} 'I'm Tim and I'm gay. 313 00:20:16,320 --> 00:20:18,360 {\an1} 'It's Gay Style.' 314 00:20:18,360 --> 00:20:21,560 {\an1} You like it, Tim? I told you I could do it. 315 00:20:21,560 --> 00:20:27,000 {\an1} OK. Bruce? Yes, Tim. Look what we have for you. Tim, Tim. 316 00:20:27,000 --> 00:20:29,680 {\an1} It's the puppy that you wanted! 317 00:20:29,680 --> 00:20:32,480 {\an1} Puppies are good for relaxation. 318 00:20:32,480 --> 00:20:35,960 {\an1} Give him a pat, Tim. This dog called Gay Dog. 319 00:20:35,960 --> 00:20:39,040 {\an1} It's the first ever gay dog. 320 00:20:40,280 --> 00:20:42,480 {\an1} Merchandise! Yes! 321 00:20:43,400 --> 00:20:47,600 {\an1} We sell shitloads of these, Tim. Gay Dog on a skateboard... 322 00:20:47,600 --> 00:20:52,040 {\an1} 'Tim has a lot less on his plate, so he can focus on skating. 323 00:20:52,040 --> 00:20:56,680 {\an1} 'Hopefully, that will make him more relaxed and less depressed.' 324 00:20:56,680 --> 00:20:58,720 {\an1} You two are gonna be best friends. 325 00:20:58,720 --> 00:21:02,840 {\an1} Who wants to watch the cartoon again? Watch. Watch. 326 00:21:04,080 --> 00:21:05,640 {\an1} # Grinding away 327 00:21:05,640 --> 00:21:08,040 {\an1} # Get out of my way Cos I'm gay! # 328 00:21:12,040 --> 00:21:17,720 {\an1} I'm starting to think that Shwayne junior is a lost cause. He's fucked himself up again. 329 00:21:17,720 --> 00:21:20,800 {\an1} His monitor alerted the authorities. 330 00:21:20,800 --> 00:21:25,000 {\an1} Now his parole officer shows up to tighten his security. 331 00:21:25,000 --> 00:21:29,760 {\an1}This device stays on. He got upgraded to an electric shock bracelet. 332 00:21:29,760 --> 00:21:34,120 {\an1} Every time he tries to step outside he gets an electric shock. 333 00:21:34,120 --> 00:21:37,160 {\an1}You walk across this beam, you will receive a shock. 334 00:21:37,160 --> 00:21:44,240 {\an1} I don't think that boy is capable of learning a lesson. What else are we supposed to do, huh? 335 00:21:44,240 --> 00:21:48,280 {\an1} Too late for an abortion! CHUCKLES 336 00:21:48,280 --> 00:21:49,720 {\an1}Put your hand up like this... 337 00:21:49,720 --> 00:21:54,560 {\an1} 'Yeah, I got another month of house arrest, but I think it's worth it.' 338 00:21:54,560 --> 00:21:59,280 {\an1} Goin' to the mall, it taught me that maybe my creative direction 339 00:21:59,280 --> 00:22:05,560 {\an1} is goin' a little bit off the way that it should be goin', off the pathway, you know what I'm saying? 340 00:22:05,560 --> 00:22:07,600 {\an1}Then you whack. Whack. Whack... 341 00:22:07,600 --> 00:22:10,200 {\an1} 'I'm not giving kids what they want.' 342 00:22:10,200 --> 00:22:13,680 {\an1} That's my job, to give them the shit that they want. 343 00:22:13,680 --> 00:22:17,240 {\an1}Whack to the right, whack to the left. Got that shit. 344 00:22:17,240 --> 00:22:21,000 {\an1} 'Kids need something familiar, you know what I'm saying?' 345 00:22:21,000 --> 00:22:25,960 {\an1} It's like My Elbow was a kid's song, but it worked. Yeah? You feel me? 346 00:22:25,960 --> 00:22:29,480 {\an1} 'So I've been spending the afternoon writing up a new song.' 347 00:22:29,480 --> 00:22:32,560 {\an1} Whack my knee! Whack my knee! 348 00:22:32,560 --> 00:22:35,840 {\an1} You gotta whip it, gotta whack it Whack my knee! 349 00:22:35,840 --> 00:22:39,880 {\an1} 'My girl Lasquisha's coming up with a dance craze to go with that song. 350 00:22:39,880 --> 00:22:44,160 {\an1} 'We've been collaborating on some moves together.' 351 00:22:44,160 --> 00:22:46,040 {\an1} Grab. Yes. 352 00:22:46,040 --> 00:22:50,080 {\an1} 'The entertainment industry is a very fast-moving industry. 353 00:22:50,080 --> 00:22:53,480 {\an1} You always gotta be two steps ahead of the motherfuckers. 354 00:22:53,480 --> 00:22:56,720 {\an1} TRACK BEGINS Whack my knee! Whack my knee! 355 00:22:56,720 --> 00:23:00,680 {\an1} You gotta whip it, gotta whack it Whack my knee! 356 00:23:00,680 --> 00:23:03,880 {\an1} Whack my knee, kids! Whack my knee, kids! 357 00:23:03,880 --> 00:23:06,920 {\an1} You gotta whip it, gotta whack it Whack my knee! 358 00:23:06,920 --> 00:23:12,400 {\an1} 'I got one month and I'm gonna open that gate after my month 359 00:23:12,400 --> 00:23:16,240 {\an1} 'and I'm gonna explode on the hip-hop scene.' 360 00:23:16,240 --> 00:23:19,280 {\an1} I don't know how it feels. We can cross it? 361 00:23:19,280 --> 00:23:21,840 {\an1} You can cross it. What if I do it? 362 00:23:21,840 --> 00:23:25,000 {\an1} 'S dot mouse exclamation mark is gonna be back.' 363 00:23:25,000 --> 00:23:30,160 {\an1} And he gonna be here and bigger than ever fucking mother before. 364 00:23:30,160 --> 00:23:31,400 {\an1} Yeah. 365 00:23:31,400 --> 00:23:34,200 {\an1} You looking for S.mouse? He right over here. 366 00:23:34,200 --> 00:23:36,200 {\an1} Who's that? Paparazzi. 367 00:23:38,320 --> 00:23:43,040 {\an1} LAUGHTER Yeah, very funny(!) 368 00:23:43,040 --> 00:23:45,080 {\an1} Lasquisha. Who am I? 369 00:23:47,720 --> 00:23:49,360 {\an1} Yeah. Yeah. 370 00:23:56,040 --> 00:23:58,480 {\an1} 'Today's been really fun. 371 00:23:58,480 --> 00:24:02,720 {\an1} 'I thought it was going to be shit but Henry's a pretty good bloke.' 372 00:24:02,720 --> 00:24:05,320 {\an1} Oh, he's down! Back to me, Henry! 373 00:24:07,640 --> 00:24:12,960 {\an1} 'Like, he's into shit that I didn't think fags were into. 374 00:24:12,960 --> 00:24:18,000 {\an1} 'He knows these hot chicks and is going to put in a good word for me.' 375 00:24:18,000 --> 00:24:20,080 {\an1} You got me, man! 376 00:24:20,080 --> 00:24:22,480 {\an1} Good arse on that. Yeah, man. 377 00:24:22,480 --> 00:24:25,520 {\an1} Good arse. I'm more of a tit man, myself. 378 00:24:25,520 --> 00:24:29,040 {\an1} D'you reckon Rose and Jessie ever do girl-on-girl? 379 00:24:29,040 --> 00:24:30,840 {\an1} I dunno. Maybe. 380 00:24:31,920 --> 00:24:34,120 {\an1} Should ask 'em. 381 00:24:34,120 --> 00:24:37,120 {\an1} Henry and I had some pretty deep convos. 382 00:24:37,120 --> 00:24:41,040 {\an1} What's it like being a fag? Good. Pretty cool. 383 00:24:41,040 --> 00:24:43,600 {\an1} I like it. 384 00:24:43,600 --> 00:24:46,640 {\an1} You been checking me out at all? 385 00:24:46,640 --> 00:24:48,320 {\an1} No. 386 00:24:48,320 --> 00:24:49,880 {\an1} Right. 387 00:24:49,880 --> 00:24:51,720 {\an1} Why not? 388 00:24:51,720 --> 00:24:54,760 {\an1} 'Turns out Henry's really good at the Wii.' 389 00:24:54,760 --> 00:24:57,560 {\an1} Should I go to the right? 390 00:24:57,560 --> 00:25:02,480 {\an1} 'It makes me want to practise so I can be as good as Henry.' 391 00:25:02,480 --> 00:25:04,720 {\an1} Champion! Yes! Well done! 392 00:25:04,720 --> 00:25:08,720 {\an1} 'Nathan, the little fuckwit, invited my mates over. 393 00:25:08,720 --> 00:25:13,040 {\an1} 'He thought I'd be all embarrassed and shit, but I didn't even care.' 394 00:25:13,040 --> 00:25:14,640 {\an1} Hey, guys. 395 00:25:14,640 --> 00:25:17,280 {\an1} 'My mates were shocked at first, 396 00:25:17,280 --> 00:25:21,400 {\an1} 'but once they got to know him and they found out that he knew 397 00:25:21,400 --> 00:25:24,800 {\an1} 'heaps of chicks that we like, they got along with him.' 398 00:25:24,800 --> 00:25:29,920 {\an1} He knows Rose and Jessie. We're really good friends, yeah. 399 00:25:29,920 --> 00:25:32,520 {\an1} You want to get a three-player going? 400 00:25:32,520 --> 00:25:36,400 {\an1} He kicks at the Wii. He's a fucking champion! 401 00:25:36,400 --> 00:25:40,200 {\an1} 'I don't reckon Henry and I will end up being best mates 402 00:25:40,200 --> 00:25:43,560 {\an1} 'but, like, if I see him round school, I'd say g'day.' 403 00:25:43,560 --> 00:25:46,480 {\an1} Look how good he is. He's fucking killing it! 404 00:25:46,480 --> 00:25:50,800 {\an1} 'After you spend a while with him, you sort of forget that he's a fag.' 405 00:25:50,800 --> 00:25:55,120 {\an1} Hey, Steve, have you heard some of the new words that Kayden's learnt? 406 00:25:56,200 --> 00:26:00,040 {\an1}Fuck off, you fag. Oh! Come on, language, guys. 407 00:26:00,040 --> 00:26:03,240 {\an1} Say it again. Fuck off, you fag! 408 00:26:03,240 --> 00:26:05,640 {\an1} Oh, Kayden! Mate! 409 00:26:08,560 --> 00:26:10,520 {\an1} We do family day four times a year. 410 00:26:10,520 --> 00:26:14,400 {\an1}What if Mum brings my dog and he tries to wank it? 411 00:26:14,400 --> 00:26:17,640 {\an1} Shut up or I'll cancel family day! 412 00:26:17,640 --> 00:26:20,480 {\an1} Mum's coming today, is she? 413 00:26:20,480 --> 00:26:22,520 {\an1} I love your outfit! 414 00:26:22,520 --> 00:26:25,920 {\an1} It doesn't mean she doesn't love you. 415 00:26:25,920 --> 00:26:28,600 {\an1} I think they find me quite entertaining. 416 00:26:29,400 --> 00:26:34,480 {\an1} You wave a bit of pink at her and she's so fucking happy. 417 00:26:34,480 --> 00:26:36,640 {\an1} Don't tell Mum I did that. 418 00:26:36,640 --> 00:26:39,560 {\an1} You got your cock out, don't want a kid to see it. 419 00:26:41,800 --> 00:26:45,240 {\an1} If he shot my fucking balls off, he would have been dead. 420 00:26:45,240 --> 00:26:47,880 {\an1}We can't let people like this in our lives. 421 00:26:47,880 --> 00:26:50,800 {\an1} Nathe pulls way more chicks than me. 422 00:26:50,800 --> 00:26:53,560 {\an1} All the methods, he's learnt from me. 423 00:26:53,560 --> 00:26:56,440 {\an1} She's a really fucking hot chick. 424 00:26:56,440 --> 00:27:01,240 {\an1} I reckon I could get her. Yeah(!) I fucking could. 425 00:27:01,240 --> 00:27:04,400 {\an1} 'We came up with this plan.' This is Nathan. 426 00:27:04,400 --> 00:27:07,840 {\an1} Wish me luck. Hi, Chloe. Dan, piss off! 427 00:27:07,840 --> 00:27:10,840 {\an1} She's got a hand on your arse. Very amusing. 428 00:27:10,840 --> 00:27:13,480 {\an1}Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd