1
00:00:00,667 --> 00:00:01,960
‐(STARTLED)
‐You got this!
2
00:00:02,044 --> 00:00:03,712
‐(WHISPERS) I've got this.
‐(BOTH GRUNT)
3
00:00:04,004 --> 00:00:05,589
‐That's it.
‐Oh, bugger me!
4
00:00:05,672 --> 00:00:07,007
Oh no!
5
00:00:07,716 --> 00:00:08,967
♪ (JAUNTY MUSIC PLAYS) ♪
6
00:00:09,051 --> 00:00:10,594
(CROWDS CHEERING)
7
00:00:10,677 --> 00:00:11,470
Get me a car to Buffalo.
8
00:00:11,553 --> 00:00:12,679
You're going to the White House?
9
00:00:12,763 --> 00:00:14,556
Oh, yes! Time to do
some corporate begging.
10
00:00:14,640 --> 00:00:15,557
ALAN LEWIS: Oh!
11
00:00:15,849 --> 00:00:17,809
‐(APPLAUSE)
‐RYAN CLARK: Oh, hey! Come on.
12
00:00:17,893 --> 00:00:18,769
I was just doing my job.
13
00:00:18,852 --> 00:00:20,521
Just did what we had to do.
14
00:00:20,604 --> 00:00:21,855
I did what I had to do.
15
00:00:21,939 --> 00:00:22,981
HERMAN JUDD:
It's getting thicker!
16
00:00:23,065 --> 00:00:25,400
‐This is your fault.
‐It's Frank's fault!
17
00:00:25,484 --> 00:00:27,402
‐He hit the big brown buttons.
‐KAREN KELLY: Frank!
18
00:00:27,486 --> 00:00:28,820
CROWD: (CHANTING)
Ship him out!
19
00:00:28,904 --> 00:00:29,863
Frank! Frank!
20
00:00:29,947 --> 00:00:32,324
CLARK: Calm,
and I cannot stress this enough,
21
00:00:32,407 --> 00:00:33,909
the fuck down!
22
00:00:33,992 --> 00:00:36,453
These people
are humanity's finest,
23
00:00:36,537 --> 00:00:38,163
‐and they need‐‐
‐(RAUCOUS CHATTER)
24
00:00:38,247 --> 00:00:39,915
AIDE:
The president will see you now.
25
00:00:39,998 --> 00:00:40,916
Great.
26
00:00:48,090 --> 00:00:50,259
RYAN CLARK: (ENGLISH ACCENT) He
nearly got Frank space‐lynched,
27
00:00:50,342 --> 00:00:52,177
so what are we gonna do
about Judd?
28
00:00:52,261 --> 00:00:54,680
(SCOFFS) Two options.
29
00:00:54,763 --> 00:00:57,516
One, murder. And two,
30
00:00:57,599 --> 00:00:59,810
and I know I keep
looping back to this...
31
00:00:59,893 --> 00:01:00,686
murder.
32
00:01:00,769 --> 00:01:02,604
You keep saying that word,
Karen.
33
00:01:02,688 --> 00:01:05,107
You keep saying it.
34
00:01:05,190 --> 00:01:07,818
Okay, can you please
just let me fix your door?
35
00:01:07,901 --> 00:01:09,861
No.
I'm going to do this myself.
36
00:01:09,945 --> 00:01:13,156
I may be a fake and a fraud
and a terrible lay
37
00:01:13,240 --> 00:01:15,117
and a credit risk
and a tax‐dodger
38
00:01:15,200 --> 00:01:16,535
and an emotional homunculus,
39
00:01:16,618 --> 00:01:19,413
but I am still a useful,
functioning‐‐
40
00:01:20,080 --> 00:01:21,039
Actually, can you do this?
41
00:01:21,123 --> 00:01:22,165
‐Yeah.
‐RYAN: Yeah.
42
00:01:23,292 --> 00:01:25,043
‐(GASPS) Baby!
‐RYAN: What?
43
00:01:25,127 --> 00:01:26,420
A passenger has just gone
into labor.
44
00:01:26,503 --> 00:01:28,046
‐There's gonna be a baby!
‐BILLIE MCEVOY: Whoa!
45
00:01:28,130 --> 00:01:29,590
Holy shit! We're having a baby?
46
00:01:29,673 --> 00:01:31,133
‐Mr. Judd's in there.
‐Why?
47
00:01:31,216 --> 00:01:33,594
He's, quote,
"executive producing" the birth.
48
00:01:34,928 --> 00:01:36,555
‐Here.
‐Yeah, yeah, leave it with me.
49
00:01:36,638 --> 00:01:38,015
(DOOR CLATTERS)
50
00:01:38,098 --> 00:01:39,725
(KAREN KELLY SIGHS)
51
00:01:39,808 --> 00:01:41,101
‐I'm fine. Yeah.
‐KAREN: You all right?
52
00:01:41,184 --> 00:01:43,312
That's it, come on!
Get it out of her!
53
00:01:43,395 --> 00:01:45,230
‐(CRYING)
‐That's it. Hey! Hey!
54
00:01:45,314 --> 00:01:48,817
Vacuum extraction! My idea!
We're gonna suck a person
55
00:01:48,900 --> 00:01:50,611
‐out of this person!
‐BILLIE: Yeah.
56
00:01:50,694 --> 00:01:51,903
‐(HANNAH SCREAMS)
‐Let's go!
57
00:01:51,987 --> 00:01:53,822
MATT SPENCER: God,
the baby is going from a womb
58
00:01:53,905 --> 00:01:55,240
surrounded by bodily fluids
59
00:01:55,324 --> 00:01:57,367
to a ship surrounded
by bodily solids.
60
00:01:57,451 --> 00:01:58,869
Where did you come from,
eyeballs?
61
00:01:58,952 --> 00:02:00,954
Originally? Pennsylvania.
62
00:02:01,038 --> 00:02:02,080
Before the fires.
63
00:02:02,164 --> 00:02:05,083
‐(HANNAH SCREAMS)
‐HERMAN JUDD: Whoa!
64
00:02:05,167 --> 00:02:06,835
(BABY CRIES)
65
00:02:07,961 --> 00:02:09,921
‐I'll cut the string.
‐Cord.
66
00:02:10,005 --> 00:02:12,257
MATT: Full Hakuna Matata!
67
00:02:12,341 --> 00:02:14,509
‐JUDD: There we go. Hey...
‐(LOUD BEEP)
68
00:02:14,593 --> 00:02:17,429
I'm gonna keep the placenta.
Fair's fair.
69
00:02:17,512 --> 00:02:20,182
Have this snap frozen.
Landmark human tissue.
70
00:02:21,266 --> 00:02:23,143
‐MATT: You fucking killed it.
‐HANNAH: What?
71
00:02:23,226 --> 00:02:25,729
‐JUDD: Oh...
‐MATT: Like, I'm smiling.
72
00:02:25,812 --> 00:02:27,731
You killed it, like...
(CHUCKLES)
73
00:02:27,814 --> 00:02:28,690
It's a baby.
74
00:02:28,774 --> 00:02:30,233
Yeah, it's really‐‐
It's a good one.
75
00:02:30,317 --> 00:02:32,152
‐(BABY GURGLING)
‐(LOUD BEEP)
76
00:02:34,529 --> 00:02:37,407
♪ (THEME MUSIC PLAYS) ♪
77
00:02:44,831 --> 00:02:46,375
People of Avenue 5,
78
00:02:46,458 --> 00:02:48,668
I bring you tidings
of great joy.
79
00:02:48,752 --> 00:02:52,130
At 1105 hours today,
we welcomed
80
00:02:52,214 --> 00:02:55,133
‐the first ever bab‐‐
‐The first baby born in space!
81
00:02:55,217 --> 00:02:56,385
(CHEERING)
82
00:02:57,302 --> 00:02:58,637
‐Oh, I'm so sorry, did you‐‐
‐It's fine.
83
00:02:58,720 --> 00:03:00,472
‐I just really wanted to say it.
‐I'm so sorry.
84
00:03:00,555 --> 00:03:03,683
You know, I sometimes have this
terrible case of Karen Mouth
85
00:03:03,767 --> 00:03:06,144
‐and, you know...
‐(LOUD BEEP)
86
00:03:06,228 --> 00:03:07,604
MIA: What's the name?
87
00:03:07,687 --> 00:03:09,231
Oh, now she's interested
in babies.
88
00:03:09,314 --> 00:03:12,818
No name as yet.
Current alias, AKA Space Baby.
89
00:03:12,901 --> 00:03:14,111
‐A beautiful...
‐Baby boy! (CHUCKLES)
90
00:03:14,194 --> 00:03:15,779
‐little baby b‐‐
‐Baby boy!
91
00:03:15,862 --> 00:03:17,239
‐(CHUCKLES)
‐(CROWD CHEERS)
92
00:03:17,322 --> 00:03:18,990
I did it again! You know
what it was?
93
00:03:19,074 --> 00:03:21,326
'Cause you said "little," so‐‐
94
00:03:21,410 --> 00:03:22,953
and I just went straight
to "baby boy,"
95
00:03:23,036 --> 00:03:24,871
so I got there first,
otherwise we would've‐‐
96
00:03:24,955 --> 00:03:26,498
Is that it?
Or is it your Karen Mouth
97
00:03:26,581 --> 00:03:27,833
‐that you can't shut?
‐(LOUD BEEP)
98
00:03:27,916 --> 00:03:31,086
What is that?
Why is the ship beeping?
99
00:03:31,169 --> 00:03:34,297
You know‐‐ and this has
never happened before‐‐
100
00:03:34,965 --> 00:03:36,258
I don't actually know.
101
00:03:36,341 --> 00:03:37,426
MAN 1: What does he look like?
102
00:03:37,509 --> 00:03:40,303
‐Oh, he is adora‐‐
‐Adora‐‐
103
00:03:40,387 --> 00:03:42,472
What is your damage?
104
00:03:42,556 --> 00:03:44,766
‐We need to sort this‐‐
‐Yeah, Captain, I'm on it.
105
00:03:46,059 --> 00:03:47,102
(LOUD BEEP)
106
00:03:47,185 --> 00:03:48,562
Presumably, it's a warning
of some kind.
107
00:03:48,645 --> 00:03:50,689
Well, yes, you don't usually
have a recurring beep
108
00:03:50,772 --> 00:03:52,441
to tell you
everything's going just fine.
109
00:03:54,401 --> 00:03:56,611
‐(LOUD BEEP)
‐RYAN: It's down here.
110
00:03:57,320 --> 00:03:58,530
Some‐‐ It's somewhere...
111
00:03:58,613 --> 00:03:59,656
(LOUD BEEP)
112
00:04:00,782 --> 00:04:02,784
‐(LOUD BEEP)
‐RYAN: No, it's... it's...
113
00:04:03,410 --> 00:04:04,578
(LOUD BEEP)
114
00:04:04,661 --> 00:04:06,037
RYAN: No, it's not up here.
115
00:04:06,121 --> 00:04:08,457
Man, they really love
that baby, huh?
116
00:04:08,540 --> 00:04:10,667
Yeah, babies are like
New Zealanders.
117
00:04:10,751 --> 00:04:13,545
Everyone loves them
and the funny way they talk.
118
00:04:13,628 --> 00:04:16,173
‐Oh, there's Iris.
‐See that? See that?
119
00:04:16,256 --> 00:04:18,383
She never looks at me like that.
120
00:04:18,467 --> 00:04:20,510
She never gives me that look.
121
00:04:20,594 --> 00:04:22,637
(SUCKS TEETH) Funny.
122
00:04:23,388 --> 00:04:24,931
‐Are you hurting?
‐Hmm?
123
00:04:26,308 --> 00:04:27,642
Is that baby hurting you?
124
00:04:30,353 --> 00:04:31,438
MATT: Yeah?
125
00:04:32,564 --> 00:04:36,943
(SIGHS) Face it.
They prefer that baby to me.
126
00:04:37,986 --> 00:04:39,696
Baby gives them hope.
127
00:04:39,780 --> 00:04:43,241
All I give them
is shitty‐yuck‐yuck.
128
00:04:43,325 --> 00:04:46,286
(SIGHS) Not that
it's a competition.
129
00:04:46,369 --> 00:04:47,954
Judd versus Baby.
130
00:04:48,830 --> 00:04:50,916
But if it were,
I'd destroy that baby.
131
00:04:50,999 --> 00:04:53,585
Physically, emotionally,
endurance‐wise.
132
00:04:53,668 --> 00:04:54,753
I'd finish that baby
133
00:04:54,836 --> 00:04:57,214
before he could get past
the first month.
134
00:04:57,297 --> 00:04:58,757
It wouldn't even be
a fair contest.
135
00:04:58,840 --> 00:05:01,051
One shot to the soft spot,
that baby's down for the count.
136
00:05:01,134 --> 00:05:03,345
Yeah, it wouldn't have
the upper body strength.
137
00:05:03,887 --> 00:05:05,180
(LOUD BEEP)
138
00:05:05,263 --> 00:05:09,184
Captain? Captain.
Uh, the ship is beeping.
139
00:05:09,267 --> 00:05:12,062
And I can tell you why.
I'm going to cover my mouth...
140
00:05:12,145 --> 00:05:14,815
(MUFFLED) because this
could cause mass distress.
141
00:05:14,898 --> 00:05:18,401
It's an oxygen beep.
Uh, we've got a leak.
142
00:05:20,695 --> 00:05:22,531
‐Well‐‐ I mean, that‐‐
‐Billie? Billie?
143
00:05:22,614 --> 00:05:24,741
I don't know
what else it could be,
144
00:05:24,825 --> 00:05:26,451
and maybe he's right?
145
00:05:26,535 --> 00:05:28,370
‐I‐‐ I‐‐ I just‐‐
‐We need oxygen!
146
00:05:28,453 --> 00:05:29,788
‐I love oxygen!
‐Captain, your mouth.
147
00:05:29,871 --> 00:05:31,414
‐Cover your fucking mouth.
‐RYAN: Billie?
148
00:05:31,498 --> 00:05:33,458
Well, hopefully it's just one‐‐
149
00:05:33,542 --> 00:05:34,584
Hopefully, it's just
150
00:05:34,668 --> 00:05:36,044
‐one leaking tank...
‐RYAN: Okay.
151
00:05:36,127 --> 00:05:38,755
BILLIE: ...but if the recycling
system's screwed, then...
152
00:05:38,839 --> 00:05:39,840
so are we.
153
00:05:39,923 --> 00:05:42,592
The running out of air,
is it as bad as they say?
154
00:05:42,676 --> 00:05:44,261
‐Or not as bad?
‐Yeah, it's bad.
155
00:05:44,344 --> 00:05:46,721
I mean, like, first you get,
like, a grittiness in your eyes,
156
00:05:46,805 --> 00:05:49,099
then your tongue is literally
gonna boil in your mouth
157
00:05:49,182 --> 00:05:51,977
before you just pass out and you
just never wake up again.
158
00:05:52,060 --> 00:05:53,979
SPIKE MARTIN:
Don't forget the organ failure.
159
00:05:54,062 --> 00:05:56,439
Oh, I almost forgot
the organ failure.
160
00:05:56,523 --> 00:05:59,401
(SIGHS) I've just seen
my perfect Space Baby.
161
00:05:59,484 --> 00:06:00,944
Iris,
you should prepare to enjoy
162
00:06:01,027 --> 00:06:02,237
your last moments of happiness,
163
00:06:02,320 --> 00:06:05,198
because we think
we may have an oxygen leak.
164
00:06:05,282 --> 00:06:06,533
‐An oxygen leak?
‐ALL: Shh!
165
00:06:06,616 --> 00:06:08,368
BILLIE: Freak out into your hand
and cover your mouth.
166
00:06:08,451 --> 00:06:10,245
‐Do we have enough to get home?
‐SPIKE: It depends.
167
00:06:10,328 --> 00:06:13,582
Vigorous activity would
drain this turkey in no time.
168
00:06:13,665 --> 00:06:15,959
I'm talking exercise, singing,
169
00:06:16,042 --> 00:06:18,086
lovemaking,
if you're doing it right.
170
00:06:18,169 --> 00:06:19,170
Ugh.
171
00:06:19,254 --> 00:06:20,797
(AMERICAN ACCENT)
Hey! Hi there. Howdy.
172
00:06:20,880 --> 00:06:22,424
You keep greeting people
in triplicate,
173
00:06:22,507 --> 00:06:24,467
we'll be dead by Tuesday.
174
00:06:24,551 --> 00:06:25,677
‐Karen.
‐KAREN: Hey.
175
00:06:25,760 --> 00:06:26,845
Why do you all look
so jumpy?
176
00:06:26,928 --> 00:06:31,016
We... have a leak.
We're running out of oxygen.
177
00:06:31,099 --> 00:06:33,184
‐A leak?!
‐(STIFLED MUTTERS)
178
00:06:33,268 --> 00:06:35,520
What is this ship made of,
tin foil?
179
00:06:35,604 --> 00:06:37,147
‐(SPIKE CHUCKLES)
‐(LOUD BEEP)
180
00:06:37,230 --> 00:06:38,106
Hi, girl.
181
00:06:38,189 --> 00:06:39,691
I don't actually think
this is about
182
00:06:39,774 --> 00:06:41,526
that non‐combat‐ready baby.
183
00:06:41,610 --> 00:06:42,736
I think it's about
184
00:06:42,819 --> 00:06:45,905
what your inner voice
is telling you about yourself.
185
00:06:45,989 --> 00:06:48,199
‐What is it saying?
‐The one I'm using now?
186
00:06:48,283 --> 00:06:49,701
No, the voice inside your head.
187
00:06:49,784 --> 00:06:53,038
Oh, no, my thoughts connect
instantaneously with my mouth.
188
00:06:53,121 --> 00:06:54,372
It's extremely efficient.
189
00:06:54,456 --> 00:06:56,416
Clinically,
it's probably very unique.
190
00:06:57,208 --> 00:06:59,336
‐(LOUD BEEP)
‐(GRUNTS) Iris!
191
00:06:59,419 --> 00:07:01,630
MATT: Okay, how about this?
192
00:07:02,005 --> 00:07:03,089
(SIGHS)
193
00:07:03,173 --> 00:07:04,591
You need to change
the way they see you.
194
00:07:04,674 --> 00:07:07,093
You need to change the way
they see the shit.
195
00:07:07,177 --> 00:07:09,220
♪ (DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYS) ♪
196
00:07:09,304 --> 00:07:10,305
Wait...
197
00:07:12,057 --> 00:07:13,266
Are‐‐ Are you...
198
00:07:14,476 --> 00:07:16,436
Are you talking about...
199
00:07:16,519 --> 00:07:17,604
lasers?
200
00:07:20,315 --> 00:07:22,567
Specifically...
201
00:07:22,651 --> 00:07:27,322
illuminating the ring
of nasty shit
202
00:07:27,405 --> 00:07:31,284
around the ship
with some goddamn lasers?
203
00:07:32,285 --> 00:07:33,870
‐(LOUD BEEP)
‐JUDD: Iris!
204
00:07:35,664 --> 00:07:38,249
‐Miss Mulcair? (CLEARS THROAT)
‐Hi.
205
00:07:38,333 --> 00:07:40,418
The President thanks you
for your visit,
206
00:07:40,502 --> 00:07:43,338
and I can confirm
we will be funding the rescue.
207
00:07:43,421 --> 00:07:44,923
(GASPS) Oh, knock me sideways!
208
00:07:45,006 --> 00:07:48,259
That is like diving into
a bath of beans!
209
00:07:48,343 --> 00:07:50,762
Well, once you clear it
with the Other President,
210
00:07:50,845 --> 00:07:51,805
you are good to go!
211
00:07:51,888 --> 00:07:54,349
I'm sorry?
The Other President?
212
00:07:54,432 --> 00:07:57,143
I assumed the Other President
was already across this.
213
00:07:57,227 --> 00:07:59,020
We don't like to bother
the Other President
214
00:07:59,104 --> 00:08:00,563
unless
it's absolutely necessary.
215
00:08:00,647 --> 00:08:02,315
‐No?
‐So, if you could just slip on
216
00:08:02,399 --> 00:08:04,025
these electrostatic
shoe covers...
217
00:08:04,109 --> 00:08:06,945
‐Right, okay, right.
‐If we could just get a move on.
218
00:08:07,028 --> 00:08:10,865
Okay. Let's go and...
(CHUCKLES) ...do this!
219
00:08:12,534 --> 00:08:16,162
♪ (SOMBER STRING MUSIC PLAYS) ♪
220
00:08:18,665 --> 00:08:19,708
(LOUD BEEP)
221
00:08:22,836 --> 00:08:23,878
(LOUD BEEP)
222
00:08:24,921 --> 00:08:26,256
(SIGHS)
223
00:08:26,339 --> 00:08:29,092
‐(LOUD BEEP)
‐(SIGHS)
224
00:08:30,135 --> 00:08:32,220
‐(LOUD BEEP)
‐(SCREAMS)
225
00:08:35,724 --> 00:08:37,726
‐(LOUD BEEP)
‐(HEAVY SIGH)
226
00:08:43,064 --> 00:08:44,065
(LOUD BEEP)
227
00:08:47,527 --> 00:08:50,697
JUDD: Good morning and so forth.
Mm‐hmm.
228
00:08:50,780 --> 00:08:53,158
‐Oh, Mr. Judd‐‐
‐JUDD: Great.
229
00:08:53,241 --> 00:08:56,369
Shall we begin this meeting
forthwith heretofore, please?
230
00:08:58,913 --> 00:09:01,041
All right, so, uh, welcome
231
00:09:01,124 --> 00:09:05,837
to this first passenger‐crew
liaison meeting.
232
00:09:05,920 --> 00:09:07,797
‐(LOUD BEEP)
‐(RYAN CHOKES)
233
00:09:07,881 --> 00:09:10,008
(ENGLISH ACCENT)
Fucking hands!
234
00:09:10,091 --> 00:09:11,885
All you had to do
was hold the cup!
235
00:09:11,968 --> 00:09:14,345
‐Fumbling bitches...
‐MIA: Is he British?
236
00:09:14,429 --> 00:09:16,014
‐No, he's doing a voice.
‐Oh, okay.
237
00:09:16,097 --> 00:09:18,016
You know it's coming,
then you forget it's coming,
238
00:09:18,099 --> 00:09:19,601
‐and it just‐‐
‐JUDD: Set a reminder, uh,
239
00:09:19,684 --> 00:09:21,019
pre‐beep to remind me
of the big beep.
240
00:09:21,102 --> 00:09:22,854
‐You got it, baby.
‐Already on it, thank you, Matt.
241
00:09:22,937 --> 00:09:25,356
KAREN: All right, so,
I think it would be fitting
242
00:09:25,440 --> 00:09:28,651
‐to start with an apology.
‐JUDD: I accept.
243
00:09:28,735 --> 00:09:31,029
From you to me,
you big S‐gibbon,
244
00:09:31,112 --> 00:09:34,199
because you tried to fire
my husband out the ship!
245
00:09:34,282 --> 00:09:36,034
Mm‐mm. I never say sorry.
246
00:09:36,117 --> 00:09:37,869
Like my hero, Gandhi.
247
00:09:37,952 --> 00:09:40,705
All right. Agenda, shall we?
248
00:09:40,789 --> 00:09:42,207
I have a question.
249
00:09:42,290 --> 00:09:45,710
I would like a new cabin
away from my broken prophylactic
250
00:09:45,794 --> 00:09:46,920
‐of a husband.
‐Will you‐‐
251
00:09:47,003 --> 00:09:49,589
All due respect, normo,
we have bigger fish to fry.
252
00:09:49,672 --> 00:09:51,716
Second that.
And we can't afford the air.
253
00:09:51,800 --> 00:09:53,093
‐Right.
‐MIA: Wait, why not?
254
00:09:53,176 --> 00:09:54,427
‐(SNAPS)
‐(LOUD BEEP)
255
00:09:54,511 --> 00:09:56,346
‐(LAUGHS)
‐What do you mean,
you can't afford the air?
256
00:09:56,429 --> 00:09:58,890
‐Iris, did you‐‐
did you just laugh?
‐You're delirious.
257
00:09:58,973 --> 00:10:01,893
JUDD: All right, so,
I have figured out a way
258
00:10:01,976 --> 00:10:05,021
to re‐perceive the turd sleeve
around this ship.
259
00:10:05,105 --> 00:10:08,108
Three words:
theatrical lighting rig.
260
00:10:08,191 --> 00:10:11,736
And here's five:
what, what, and why?
261
00:10:11,820 --> 00:10:13,655
Uh...
No, that's four.
262
00:10:13,738 --> 00:10:14,739
Fuck, I'm so tired.
Jesus.
263
00:10:14,823 --> 00:10:16,741
I'm sorry,
are we running out of air?
264
00:10:16,825 --> 00:10:18,201
‐Yeah.
‐MIA: Like, actual air?
265
00:10:18,284 --> 00:10:19,744
Not, like, cooking air
266
00:10:19,828 --> 00:10:21,704
or, you know, like,
air conditioning‐‐
267
00:10:21,788 --> 00:10:23,581
In nine months,
so don't get pregnant,
268
00:10:23,665 --> 00:10:25,083
that'd be a complete
waste of time.
269
00:10:25,166 --> 00:10:28,002
Okay, I'm‐‐ I'm calm.
I'm not gonna tell anybody.
270
00:10:28,670 --> 00:10:30,421
Good. All right.
271
00:10:30,505 --> 00:10:32,841
‐So, can we just focus‐‐
‐I thought I was calm,
272
00:10:32,924 --> 00:10:35,093
but I am not fucking calm.
I don't wanna die!
273
00:10:35,176 --> 00:10:37,137
I don't wanna run out of air!
274
00:10:37,220 --> 00:10:38,471
‐Thank you.
‐(LOUD BEEP)
275
00:10:46,312 --> 00:10:49,649
‐Hey, Secretary of State.
‐Hi, Judd Galaxy.
276
00:10:51,317 --> 00:10:52,485
I like your nails.
277
00:10:54,863 --> 00:10:56,739
‐Thank you.
‐You got any wax?
278
00:10:56,823 --> 00:10:59,325
‐This string's dried out.
‐What, crossbow wax?
279
00:10:59,409 --> 00:11:01,870
Ooh, let me have a look.
No, sorry.
280
00:11:01,953 --> 00:11:03,538
‐(BEEP)
‐Oh, it's me.
281
00:11:05,874 --> 00:11:08,418
(WHISPERS) Okay. Do I just...?
282
00:11:08,501 --> 00:11:10,920
THE OTHER PRESIDENT:
(ROBOTIC MALE VOICE)
Miss Mulcair, please clearly
283
00:11:11,004 --> 00:11:12,297
and audibly
state your business.
284
00:11:12,380 --> 00:11:16,050
Right, hello. Uh, I am here
on behalf of Judd Galaxy.
285
00:11:16,134 --> 00:11:19,137
We urgently need rescue funds.
286
00:11:19,220 --> 00:11:23,308
Four point two three
trillion dollars.
287
00:11:23,391 --> 00:11:26,227
I believe written materials
have been submitted directly...
288
00:11:26,978 --> 00:11:28,021
into you?
289
00:11:29,564 --> 00:11:31,691
THE OTHER PRESIDENT: We will
redirect funds from the...
290
00:11:31,774 --> 00:11:33,526
(FEMALE VOICE)
...National Child Welfare...
291
00:11:33,610 --> 00:11:34,569
(MALE VOICE) ...program.
292
00:11:34,652 --> 00:11:38,364
Oh. Oh, my God.
This‐‐ This is...
293
00:11:38,448 --> 00:11:41,034
(LAUGHS) ...everything!
294
00:11:41,117 --> 00:11:42,702
Thank you so much!
295
00:11:42,785 --> 00:11:45,121
I have been
in such a dark place.
296
00:11:45,205 --> 00:11:46,748
Can I‐‐ No? No? (CHUCKLES)
297
00:11:46,831 --> 00:11:48,333
Thank you. Thank you, thank you.
298
00:11:48,416 --> 00:11:50,335
THE OTHER PRESIDENT: Please,
will you consider the removal
299
00:11:50,418 --> 00:11:52,253
of 500 non‐essential
passengers?
300
00:11:54,214 --> 00:11:55,590
Right.
301
00:11:55,673 --> 00:11:59,427
I absolutely hear...
what you're saying.
302
00:11:59,510 --> 00:12:02,764
It's just that that would raise
one or two
303
00:12:02,847 --> 00:12:04,974
‐ethical questions‐‐
‐Thank you!
304
00:12:05,058 --> 00:12:07,310
Your query has been forwarded
to the...
305
00:12:07,393 --> 00:12:08,686
(DEEP MALE VOICE)
...Department of Ethics.
306
00:12:08,770 --> 00:12:10,772
‐But, uh...
‐Goodbye. Have a nice day.
307
00:12:10,855 --> 00:12:12,857
RAV MULCAIR: No. No, no, no, no.
308
00:12:12,941 --> 00:12:15,109
KAREN: All right,
so I appreciate that some of us
309
00:12:15,193 --> 00:12:17,612
are sleep‐victimized. However,
310
00:12:17,695 --> 00:12:20,323
bearing in mind
the scarcity of resources,
311
00:12:20,406 --> 00:12:22,533
can we try to keep lang'
at an abs' min'?
312
00:12:22,617 --> 00:12:26,454
‐Wh‐‐ What are you saying?
‐I am trying to conserve oxygen
313
00:12:26,537 --> 00:12:28,790
by... 'bridging my w'rds.
314
00:12:28,873 --> 00:12:30,708
Well, it's highly,
highly confusing.
315
00:12:30,792 --> 00:12:32,669
You see, you did not need
the second "highly,"
316
00:12:32,752 --> 00:12:34,879
‐one would've s'ff'c'd.
‐Would‐‐
317
00:12:34,963 --> 00:12:35,964
‐Sufficed.
‐Ugh.
318
00:12:36,047 --> 00:12:37,882
‐Jesus frazzling Christ!
‐Oh, my God.
319
00:12:37,966 --> 00:12:40,260
Can we skip
the missing letters round?
320
00:12:40,343 --> 00:12:42,262
I've just reconsidered
your earlier point,
321
00:12:42,345 --> 00:12:44,389
re: an apology.
S'ry.
322
00:12:44,472 --> 00:12:45,974
‐(LOUD BEEP)
‐(IRIS KIMURA LAUGHS)
323
00:12:46,849 --> 00:12:48,393
‐Iris, you laughed!
‐Fine! I'm s‐‐
324
00:12:48,476 --> 00:12:50,311
‐What's the matter with you?
‐I‐‐ I find it amusing.
325
00:12:50,395 --> 00:12:53,564
(SNICKERING) I don't know why,
it just... beep!
326
00:12:53,648 --> 00:12:55,900
Why are you being such a baby,
Iris? Hmm?
327
00:12:55,984 --> 00:12:57,986
You like babies so much
you wanna be one?
328
00:12:58,069 --> 00:13:00,738
Question: are we really
running out of air?
329
00:13:00,822 --> 00:13:03,574
‐Supplemental: what the fuck?
‐JUDD: Yes!
330
00:13:03,658 --> 00:13:05,034
To your first question.
331
00:13:05,118 --> 00:13:07,412
I don't know how to answer
your second question.
332
00:13:07,495 --> 00:13:10,081
But Matty and I
have come up with
333
00:13:10,164 --> 00:13:12,500
a series
of oxygen conservation policies.
334
00:13:12,583 --> 00:13:14,043
"Oxygen conservation policies."
335
00:13:14,127 --> 00:13:15,420
Well, that's a lungful
right there.
336
00:13:15,503 --> 00:13:17,672
Let's try to keep the energy
positive around Mr. Judd
337
00:13:17,755 --> 00:13:19,549
‐while he pupates.
‐While he what?
338
00:13:19,632 --> 00:13:20,800
While he pupates.
339
00:13:20,883 --> 00:13:23,261
I've gone through a period
of serious introspection
340
00:13:23,344 --> 00:13:24,387
since last night.
341
00:13:25,179 --> 00:13:26,139
Okay, so first of‐‐
342
00:13:26,222 --> 00:13:29,267
Oh, also, you should know,
I‐‐ I tent now.
343
00:13:29,350 --> 00:13:32,645
First up, no running.
Leads to panting.
344
00:13:32,729 --> 00:13:34,397
‐Don't do it.
‐Oh, secondly,
345
00:13:34,480 --> 00:13:38,234
fat people shouldn't use stairs,
and avoid any incline.
346
00:13:38,317 --> 00:13:40,820
Direct! Merciless. Yes.
347
00:13:40,903 --> 00:13:42,739
Uh, fat people should not
exert themselves.
348
00:13:42,822 --> 00:13:46,075
‐By fat people, do you mean...
‐Anyone over two‐‐
349
00:13:46,159 --> 00:13:48,119
Two hundred
and fifty‐seven pounds.
350
00:13:48,202 --> 00:13:50,455
‐JUDD: Mm‐mm.
‐IRIS: Mm‐hmm.
351
00:13:50,538 --> 00:13:51,748
‐JUDD: Mm‐hmm?
‐IRIS: Mm‐hmm.
352
00:13:51,831 --> 00:13:56,085
Okay, uh, yes,
a 257‐pound cutoff.
353
00:13:56,169 --> 00:13:58,880
RYAN: So what are we going to
do? We're gonna weigh people
as they go about their‐‐
354
00:13:58,963 --> 00:14:01,299
‐Are you really
asking questions about‐‐
‐JUDD: You know what? Everyone‐‐
355
00:14:01,382 --> 00:14:04,135
please get outta here.
I‐‐ I need a safe space
to create.
356
00:14:04,218 --> 00:14:07,138
Just me, Matty, and the person
whose name I ignored.
357
00:14:07,221 --> 00:14:08,514
‐Who's that?
‐JUDD: You.
358
00:14:08,598 --> 00:14:09,640
Okay.
359
00:14:09,724 --> 00:14:11,809
That guy is a complete moron.
The more he talks,
360
00:14:11,893 --> 00:14:14,562
‐the more in danger we all are.
‐Unless we 'M' him.
361
00:14:14,645 --> 00:14:16,105
Okay, Karen,
you gotta stop saying that.
362
00:14:16,189 --> 00:14:18,274
‐That is clearly not an option‐‐
‐(KAREN CLEARS THROAT)
363
00:14:19,108 --> 00:14:20,318
Life coached by Matt?
364
00:14:20,401 --> 00:14:22,278
That's like being taught
to drive by a hen.
365
00:14:22,361 --> 00:14:24,363
We're running out of oxygen
and he's "pupating."
366
00:14:24,447 --> 00:14:25,740
He could kill us all.
367
00:14:25,823 --> 00:14:30,870
KAREN: Well, you know, Iris,
we could... sedate him.
368
00:14:30,953 --> 00:14:33,664
Yeah, no, that could work.
That could actually work.
369
00:14:33,748 --> 00:14:35,166
Well, we could double the dose?
370
00:14:35,249 --> 00:14:36,334
He might have a stroke,
371
00:14:36,417 --> 00:14:38,628
then you'll only be physically
wiping his ass.
372
00:14:38,711 --> 00:14:42,298
Right. Where are we gonna get
sedatives and a dart gun?
373
00:14:42,381 --> 00:14:43,674
Well, Matt monitors the supply,
374
00:14:43,758 --> 00:14:46,719
and I bet he has full access
to whatev' they got down there.
375
00:14:46,803 --> 00:14:48,346
Sir, it's Rav for you.
376
00:14:48,429 --> 00:14:50,681
We round Jupiter in three
minutes and lose comms.
377
00:14:50,765 --> 00:14:52,850
My cabin is closest,
so stride with me.
378
00:14:52,934 --> 00:14:56,270
Excuse me! Karen Kelly!
Make a hole, or I will!
379
00:14:59,774 --> 00:15:00,650
(LOUD BEEP)
380
00:15:00,733 --> 00:15:02,360
‐RYAN: Gah...
‐(IRIS LAUGHS)
381
00:15:02,443 --> 00:15:03,945
‐(CLEARS THROAT)
‐Now, honey,
382
00:15:04,028 --> 00:15:05,321
I have an update for you,
383
00:15:05,404 --> 00:15:08,449
and I don't want you
to go all flappy on me.
384
00:15:08,533 --> 00:15:09,826
FRANK KELLY: Okay...
385
00:15:09,909 --> 00:15:11,869
The ship is leaking oxygen.
386
00:15:11,953 --> 00:15:12,995
From what I understand,
387
00:15:13,079 --> 00:15:15,456
it will be like drowning
with dirt in your mouth
388
00:15:15,540 --> 00:15:16,791
and a tractor on your chest.
389
00:15:17,625 --> 00:15:18,626
Okay.
390
00:15:19,836 --> 00:15:21,796
‐That's fine.
‐(DRINK POURING)
391
00:15:23,339 --> 00:15:24,423
(QUIETLY) Fuck.
392
00:15:25,258 --> 00:15:28,010
(SOBBING)
393
00:15:28,094 --> 00:15:30,847
Sorry. I'm sorry.
It's only oxygen.
394
00:15:30,930 --> 00:15:32,140
KAREN: All right.
395
00:15:32,223 --> 00:15:33,307
So don't talk,
396
00:15:33,391 --> 00:15:36,018
because then you will last
marginally longer.
397
00:15:36,102 --> 00:15:36,936
Attaboy.
398
00:15:37,019 --> 00:15:38,896
Okay, guys,
I think we're on. Yeah.
399
00:15:38,980 --> 00:15:41,774
And we don't have long with her,
and it could get
a little bit glitchy.
400
00:15:41,858 --> 00:15:43,192
RAV: (THROUGH SPEAKER)
Hello‐‐ speaking‐‐ Hello?
401
00:15:43,276 --> 00:15:44,735
(AUDIO GLITCHING)
Great. Hi! I‐‐ start speaking.
402
00:15:44,819 --> 00:15:46,404
I'm gonna start speaking
before‐‐ get cut off.
403
00:15:46,487 --> 00:15:48,781
I have some good news
and some not so good news.
404
00:15:48,865 --> 00:15:52,034
The good news is...
we have funding!
405
00:15:52,118 --> 00:15:54,745
Yay! Come on! (LAUGHS)
406
00:15:54,829 --> 00:15:56,581
Wh‐‐ What was that?
What did she‐‐
407
00:15:56,664 --> 00:15:59,333
‐She said they had funding.
‐BILLIE: Shush! Yes, yes, shush!
‐The not so good news is
408
00:15:59,417 --> 00:16:02,253
the Other President suggested
we explore losing...
409
00:16:02,336 --> 00:16:05,131
(LAUGHS) ...500 NEPs,
but I rejected that,
410
00:16:05,214 --> 00:16:09,260
I said, "No, we are not killing
500 people, not today!"
411
00:16:09,343 --> 00:16:11,304
(GLITCHING) Other President
sug‐‐ we explore
412
00:16:11,387 --> 00:16:13,598
losing 500 NEPs‐‐
(SILENCE)
413
00:16:13,681 --> 00:16:16,017
BILLIE: Wait, wait, wait.
No, no, no. No, no, no! No!
414
00:16:16,100 --> 00:16:18,895
‐No, now Earth is
the other side of Jupiter.
‐(RYAN SIGHS)
415
00:16:18,978 --> 00:16:21,814
‐What's NEPs?
‐Non‐essential personnel, like‐‐
416
00:16:21,898 --> 00:16:24,650
‐Mm‐‐ Mm‐mm.
‐RYAN: Okay.
That is not on the table.
417
00:16:24,734 --> 00:16:28,571
We are not getting rid of
500 non‐essential personnel.
418
00:16:28,654 --> 00:16:29,947
My hands always get clammy
419
00:16:30,031 --> 00:16:31,908
whenever I shower
in a strange room.
420
00:16:31,991 --> 00:16:33,117
‐(LOUD BEEP)
‐Fuck you, Doug!
421
00:16:33,201 --> 00:16:35,786
‐RYAN: How are you here?
‐Yeah, what the actual frig?
422
00:16:35,870 --> 00:16:38,164
Are you wearing Frank's clothes?
423
00:16:38,247 --> 00:16:39,498
‐Two sugars?
‐Yeah.
424
00:16:39,582 --> 00:16:42,293
DOUG: I have just been ordered
homeless by Herman Judd,
425
00:16:42,376 --> 00:16:44,253
so I no longer have access
to a bathroom.
426
00:16:44,337 --> 00:16:46,172
Oh, great. You see this, Frank?
427
00:16:46,255 --> 00:16:48,132
He's using you
as a toilet friend.
428
00:16:48,216 --> 00:16:49,550
DOUG: Are you guys
seriously considering
429
00:16:49,634 --> 00:16:51,302
getting rid of 500 passengers?
430
00:16:51,385 --> 00:16:54,055
No, and you are not gonna say it
out there. All right?
431
00:16:54,138 --> 00:16:55,598
And you're particularly
not gonna say it
432
00:16:55,681 --> 00:16:57,266
‐in front of Herman Judd.
‐(LOUD BEEP)
‐(IRIS LAUGHS)
433
00:16:57,350 --> 00:17:00,061
‐RYAN: Oh, you‐‐ monotonal fuck!
‐Fuck you, Doug!
434
00:17:05,149 --> 00:17:07,735
‐(LOUD BEEP)
‐Good morning, everyone!
435
00:17:07,818 --> 00:17:09,779
We finally have a baby name.
436
00:17:10,363 --> 00:17:11,405
Kayden!
437
00:17:14,242 --> 00:17:16,994
‐Kayden?
‐That's an asshole name!
438
00:17:17,078 --> 00:17:19,330
Okay, it's just a word.
439
00:17:19,413 --> 00:17:21,249
IRIS:
And you're an asshole, asshole.
440
00:17:23,167 --> 00:17:24,502
‐Oh, you.
‐Doug.
441
00:17:24,585 --> 00:17:26,254
You look different.
Fatter, maybe?
442
00:17:26,337 --> 00:17:28,506
No, it's probably just
my spirit swelling
443
00:17:28,589 --> 00:17:31,425
‐now that I'm not with you.
‐(CHUCKLES)
444
00:17:31,509 --> 00:17:34,011
‐Hey, you're hiding something.
‐I don't know
what you're talking about.
445
00:17:34,095 --> 00:17:36,180
I know that, Doug,
that's your factory setting.
446
00:17:36,264 --> 00:17:38,474
Actually, I‐‐ I have been
made privy to something.
447
00:17:38,558 --> 00:17:40,017
Okay, so you know about
448
00:17:40,101 --> 00:17:41,769
‐the oxygen.
‐The passengers.
449
00:17:41,852 --> 00:17:43,187
‐Oxygen?
‐The shortage.
450
00:17:43,271 --> 00:17:44,689
‐There's a shortage of air?
‐Yes!
451
00:17:44,772 --> 00:17:46,440
‐Holy fuck! Are you kid‐‐
‐Okay, okay‐‐
452
00:17:46,524 --> 00:17:47,900
‐Oh, my God, are you serious?
‐Stop panicking.
453
00:17:47,984 --> 00:17:49,986
This is when one panics!
We are running out of air
454
00:17:50,069 --> 00:17:52,321
and they're shooting 500
passengers out of the airlock.
455
00:17:52,405 --> 00:17:53,364
‐What?
‐Yes!
456
00:17:53,447 --> 00:17:55,074
The airlock? Oh, my God!
Oh, my fucking God!
457
00:17:55,157 --> 00:17:56,367
‐That's horrible.
‐This is panicking!
458
00:17:56,450 --> 00:17:58,035
‐Why can you panic and I can't‐‐
‐I'm not panicking!
459
00:17:58,119 --> 00:18:00,621
‐Yeah, neither was I!
‐Then stop and lower your voice!
460
00:18:00,705 --> 00:18:01,872
Fine.
461
00:18:01,956 --> 00:18:05,543
Also, the captain is speaking
in that British voice‐‐
462
00:18:05,626 --> 00:18:08,337
‐Yeah, I heard that.
‐All right, listen, fucker,
463
00:18:08,421 --> 00:18:11,048
if they start suggesting names
of passengers,
464
00:18:11,132 --> 00:18:12,592
let's not suggest each other,
all right?
465
00:18:12,675 --> 00:18:14,176
‐That's actually a really good‐‐
‐Okay, fine.
466
00:18:14,260 --> 00:18:15,386
‐Good plan.
‐All right.
467
00:18:15,469 --> 00:18:16,721
(SCOFFS) Put your hard‐on away.
468
00:18:16,804 --> 00:18:18,514
This is purely
self‐preservation.
469
00:18:18,598 --> 00:18:19,890
Yeah, I think the same thing.
470
00:18:19,974 --> 00:18:20,891
‐Great.
‐All right, see you l‐‐
471
00:18:20,975 --> 00:18:22,226
‐See you around.
‐Okay. See you never.
472
00:18:22,310 --> 00:18:23,728
‐Come on.
‐(LOUD BEEP)
473
00:18:23,811 --> 00:18:25,855
‐Fuck you!
‐No, fuck you, Doug!
474
00:18:27,565 --> 00:18:28,649
Do you wanna‐‐
475
00:18:29,942 --> 00:18:32,987
Okay, Matt, uh... (SIGHS)
476
00:18:36,532 --> 00:18:37,450
(LOUD BEEP)
477
00:18:37,533 --> 00:18:39,201
Uh, I‐‐ I, um...
478
00:18:39,285 --> 00:18:41,245
‐I need you to hook me up.
‐MATT: What do you need?
479
00:18:41,329 --> 00:18:43,122
Synthetic veal?
Porno? Mint jelly?
480
00:18:43,205 --> 00:18:44,665
All of them, if you can.
481
00:18:44,749 --> 00:18:47,084
‐(CHUCKLES) Jesus!
‐But first, I‐‐ I, uh...
482
00:18:47,168 --> 00:18:51,547
I actually want lots and lots
and lots of sedatives.
483
00:18:51,631 --> 00:18:54,925
Look, my area of expertise
is pretty limited.
484
00:18:55,009 --> 00:18:57,553
It's basically recreational
barbiturates,
485
00:18:57,637 --> 00:19:00,806
Eastern sex practices,
Christmas music.
486
00:19:00,890 --> 00:19:04,727
But I do know suffering,
and you're suffering.
487
00:19:04,810 --> 00:19:07,605
So I just need a little bit more
information to make sure
488
00:19:07,688 --> 00:19:10,733
I'm not causing more harm
than I'm fixing.
489
00:19:12,485 --> 00:19:14,570
‐I was bullied at school.
‐Was it your ears?
490
00:19:14,654 --> 00:19:15,905
What? No. What do you mean?
491
00:19:15,988 --> 00:19:17,198
‐What's wrong with my ears?
‐Nothing.
492
00:19:17,281 --> 00:19:19,909
But that is what I would
go in on, if I was bullying you.
493
00:19:19,992 --> 00:19:21,118
I'd make you self‐conscious
494
00:19:21,202 --> 00:19:22,620
about something
that isn't even a thing
495
00:19:22,703 --> 00:19:24,705
because it makes you
question your sanity.
496
00:19:24,789 --> 00:19:27,875
Ain't that right,
you jar‐eared Dumbo fuck?
497
00:19:29,085 --> 00:19:30,628
‐It's brutal.
‐I‐‐ Yeah‐‐ Mm.
498
00:19:30,711 --> 00:19:33,589
You're right, I hate my ears.
Yeah.
499
00:19:33,673 --> 00:19:34,882
‐Sedatives?
‐I mean, look at you.
500
00:19:34,965 --> 00:19:36,801
You're like a gimp on a leash
right now.
501
00:19:36,884 --> 00:19:38,636
‐Mm‐hmm.
‐You'd do anything
for these drugs.
502
00:19:38,719 --> 00:19:40,471
‐Anything.
‐And if I don't give 'em to you,
503
00:19:40,554 --> 00:19:42,348
you're probably gonna go
below decks...
504
00:19:42,431 --> 00:19:43,683
and get them from the guys
down there.
505
00:19:43,766 --> 00:19:45,643
But you're gonna have to
sexually humiliate yourself.
506
00:19:45,726 --> 00:19:47,144
You are so good.
You're right.
507
00:19:47,228 --> 00:19:49,814
I was this close
to going down there and...
508
00:19:49,897 --> 00:19:51,440
showing someone my bottom.
509
00:19:52,608 --> 00:19:53,984
(LOUD BEEP)
510
00:19:54,068 --> 00:19:55,403
(HEAVY SIGH)
511
00:19:57,780 --> 00:20:00,991
Well, I...
I got the, um, the sleeping...
512
00:20:01,075 --> 00:20:03,285
‐Oh.
‐Yeah. Take two of these,
513
00:20:03,369 --> 00:20:05,496
it's like you've died
and gone to the opera.
514
00:20:05,579 --> 00:20:06,706
BILLIE:
All right, so give me one
515
00:20:06,789 --> 00:20:09,583
because I'm so tired
that my hair hurts me.
516
00:20:09,667 --> 00:20:12,086
(YAWNS) Oh, no.
These are for, um...
517
00:20:12,169 --> 00:20:15,256
what's the‐‐ who's the guy
who runs Judd Industries?
518
00:20:15,339 --> 00:20:16,841
‐BOTH: Judd.
‐RYAN: Yes.
519
00:20:16,924 --> 00:20:21,303
So, apparently, even, uh,
Space Baby can't sleep.
520
00:20:21,387 --> 00:20:22,930
Respectfully, fuck him.
521
00:20:23,013 --> 00:20:25,349
No, seriously, 'cause he's‐‐
he's in an incubator,
522
00:20:25,433 --> 00:20:27,184
those things are soundproofed
to balls.
523
00:20:27,268 --> 00:20:30,146
I'll take the sedatives,
and I'll go Judd drug.
524
00:20:30,229 --> 00:20:33,232
No, Karen, you will kill him.
There's a difference.
525
00:20:33,315 --> 00:20:35,943
Okay, so you two
give me the, um...
526
00:20:37,653 --> 00:20:40,656
them things,
and then I'll go...
527
00:20:41,282 --> 00:20:42,283
What?
528
00:20:42,366 --> 00:20:43,701
I'll go to‐‐ Who they for?
529
00:20:43,784 --> 00:20:45,411
‐(LOUD BEEP)
‐(KAREN GROANS)
530
00:20:45,494 --> 00:20:47,455
‐I'll take them. I'll take‐‐
‐Oh, no, no, Billie,
Billie, no‐‐
531
00:20:47,538 --> 00:20:50,207
‐Yeah, but I'm gonna give them‐‐
‐Billie, give them to me.
‐Okay‐‐
532
00:20:50,291 --> 00:20:51,375
Oh, look, it's the king!
533
00:20:51,459 --> 00:20:52,793
‐Where?
‐A‐ha!
534
00:20:52,877 --> 00:20:55,963
In your face, you and‐‐
and the other one.
535
00:20:56,046 --> 00:20:58,007
Okay. Michele's an engineer,
536
00:20:58,090 --> 00:20:59,300
you tell him
exactly what you want.
537
00:20:59,383 --> 00:21:01,802
‐Get as technical as you like.
‐JUDD: Okay.
538
00:21:02,720 --> 00:21:03,554
Michele, huh?
539
00:21:03,637 --> 00:21:05,431
I don't like boys
with girls' names.
540
00:21:05,514 --> 00:21:06,640
Okay, so...
541
00:21:07,892 --> 00:21:13,314
We fire the glitter at the turds
as we turn the lasers on?
542
00:21:13,397 --> 00:21:16,317
Or... sequins.
543
00:21:16,400 --> 00:21:22,406
Maybe sequin bombs that we make
from degradable plastics,
544
00:21:22,490 --> 00:21:25,868
and then shoot them
at the turds.
545
00:21:25,951 --> 00:21:30,122
I'm thinking six
every two minutes,
546
00:21:30,206 --> 00:21:33,000
to ensure a steady shimmer.
547
00:21:33,083 --> 00:21:36,420
Then glitter, then confetti,
548
00:21:36,504 --> 00:21:41,217
then, maybe, fairy lights,
if we all feel we've earned it.
549
00:21:41,300 --> 00:21:42,927
Okay, read it back to me.
550
00:21:43,010 --> 00:21:44,094
Let's make a sex tape!
551
00:21:44,178 --> 00:21:45,805
Get out of my line of sight.
552
00:21:45,888 --> 00:21:48,390
(JINGLE PINGS)
553
00:21:50,392 --> 00:21:51,685
‐(EXHALES)
‐MATT: Action.
554
00:21:52,645 --> 00:21:55,022
Herman Judd here,
with a brief word.
555
00:21:55,105 --> 00:21:57,691
Indeed, all of our words
must now be brief.
556
00:21:57,775 --> 00:22:00,402
That is because we're
running out of breathable air.
557
00:22:00,486 --> 00:22:02,112
(ALL GASP)
558
00:22:02,196 --> 00:22:04,907
I had intended to ease
into that one.
559
00:22:04,990 --> 00:22:08,494
We will plug this leak.
But until we do,
560
00:22:08,577 --> 00:22:10,955
you must remain
breathing steadily
561
00:22:11,038 --> 00:22:13,791
to minimize all oxygen usage.
562
00:22:13,874 --> 00:22:17,586
And cut out all
unnecessary conversation.
563
00:22:17,670 --> 00:22:19,964
No sighing, no gasping,
564
00:22:20,047 --> 00:22:23,259
no unnecessary sneezing,
no flouncing.
565
00:22:23,342 --> 00:22:25,678
If you have to be
passive aggressive,
566
00:22:25,761 --> 00:22:27,513
do it only with your eyes.
567
00:22:28,931 --> 00:22:30,140
Relax.
568
00:22:30,224 --> 00:22:31,600
‐(LOUD BEEP)
‐JUDD: Iris!
569
00:22:31,684 --> 00:22:33,936
No, no, no, wait.
This is recorded. That's...
570
00:22:34,019 --> 00:22:35,104
that's not the actual beep.
571
00:22:35,187 --> 00:22:37,815
‐JUDD: But do remain
breathing calmly.
572
00:22:37,898 --> 00:22:40,484
‐(LOUD BEEP)
‐That's the actual beep.
573
00:22:40,568 --> 00:22:43,571
That is now a legal requirement.
574
00:22:44,613 --> 00:22:45,698
Thanks, gang.
575
00:22:48,492 --> 00:22:50,119
(QUIETLY)
Okay, I'm gonna tell a joke now.
576
00:22:50,202 --> 00:22:52,746
The setup is that
there are three men
577
00:22:52,830 --> 00:22:55,040
of three different
nationalities.
578
00:22:55,124 --> 00:22:56,375
I won't tell you
which nationalities,
579
00:22:56,458 --> 00:22:58,168
'cause otherwise
you might find it amusing.
580
00:22:58,252 --> 00:23:00,296
The punchline is that
one of the men in the joke
581
00:23:00,379 --> 00:23:01,755
is considerably
more parsimonious
582
00:23:01,839 --> 00:23:04,133
than the other two men
in the joke.
583
00:23:04,216 --> 00:23:05,718
Thus concludes the joke.
584
00:23:06,510 --> 00:23:08,095
That was not funny.
585
00:23:09,430 --> 00:23:10,931
Here it comes.
586
00:23:11,891 --> 00:23:13,309
‐(LOUD BEEP)
‐(CHUCKLES)
587
00:23:13,809 --> 00:23:15,060
JUDD: Iris!
588
00:23:16,645 --> 00:23:18,480
(WHISPERING) As I walk up,
there's these cars
589
00:23:18,564 --> 00:23:20,232
falling out of the bed.
It was just‐‐
590
00:23:20,316 --> 00:23:22,443
What is the nature
of this conversation?
591
00:23:22,526 --> 00:23:24,862
Uh, I'm just talking about
my grandchildren.
592
00:23:24,945 --> 00:23:26,864
Would you classify it
as essential?
593
00:23:26,947 --> 00:23:28,490
News flash: it isn't.
594
00:23:30,200 --> 00:23:32,578
Okay, now I'm gonna do
some oxygen‐efficient banter
595
00:23:32,661 --> 00:23:33,746
with the audience.
596
00:23:33,829 --> 00:23:35,789
‐Ma'am, where are you from?
‐Utah.
597
00:23:37,791 --> 00:23:38,709
That's nice.
598
00:23:38,792 --> 00:23:40,794
(WHISPERING)
You are banal as shit.
599
00:23:43,631 --> 00:23:44,632
(LOUD BEEP)
600
00:23:46,342 --> 00:23:48,427
‐♪ (SAXOPHONE PLAYING) ♪
‐(LOUD BEEP)
601
00:23:48,510 --> 00:23:50,429
I hear ya, honey.
602
00:23:50,512 --> 00:23:52,932
‐♪ (SAXOPHONE RESUMES) ♪
‐Shoehorns are weird,
aren't they?
603
00:23:53,933 --> 00:23:56,352
Thus concludes
the shoehorns section.
604
00:23:56,936 --> 00:23:57,978
Thank you.
605
00:24:01,357 --> 00:24:02,691
(LOUD BEEP)
606
00:24:06,362 --> 00:24:07,404
(WHISPERING)
I thought I'd set up‐‐
607
00:24:07,488 --> 00:24:09,031
(WHISPERING)
I can't‐‐ I can't. I'm sorry.
608
00:24:10,115 --> 00:24:12,701
I said, I thought I'd set up
in a space
609
00:24:12,785 --> 00:24:14,578
where everyone feels welcome.
610
00:24:14,662 --> 00:24:16,497
In God's office?
611
00:24:16,580 --> 00:24:18,958
Jesus, Vishnu, Allah,
Karen Kelly.
612
00:24:19,041 --> 00:24:22,169
(CHUCKLES) I think I have
a ways to go just yet.
613
00:24:22,252 --> 00:24:23,295
‐RYAN: Sedatives.
‐KAREN: Oh‐‐
614
00:24:23,379 --> 00:24:24,755
JUDD: (WHISPERING)
Ryan!
615
00:24:24,838 --> 00:24:28,258
Get ready to have your butt
and/or ball blown off.
616
00:24:28,342 --> 00:24:31,345
(WHISPERING) Mr. Judd is about
to perform his first miracle.
617
00:24:31,428 --> 00:24:34,556
We're gonna sparklify
the Halo of Crud.
618
00:24:34,640 --> 00:24:35,891
(LOUD BEEP)
619
00:24:35,975 --> 00:24:38,435
IRIS: (WHISPERING LOUDLY)
I have an update.
620
00:24:38,519 --> 00:24:42,106
Space Baby has jaundice.
He's on a respirator.
621
00:24:42,189 --> 00:24:44,942
Jaundice?
Somebody's got a weak liver.
622
00:24:45,025 --> 00:24:46,151
‐Is he okay?
‐IRIS: He's fine,
623
00:24:46,235 --> 00:24:48,237
just laying there
with his oxygen mask.
624
00:24:48,320 --> 00:24:49,446
Greedy little fuck.
625
00:24:49,530 --> 00:24:52,199
Yeah! There's my girl.
Welcome back. Missed you, girl.
626
00:24:52,282 --> 00:24:55,077
(LOUDLY) Yeah, fuck Space Baby,
stealing all our oxygen.
627
00:24:55,160 --> 00:24:57,037
(WHISPERING) Who's stealing
the oxygen? What's going on?
628
00:24:57,121 --> 00:24:58,455
WOMAN 1: We just heard the news.
629
00:24:58,539 --> 00:24:59,748
Oh, shit. They told you?
630
00:24:59,832 --> 00:25:01,625
About the 500 NEPs
they're shooting into space?
631
00:25:01,709 --> 00:25:03,293
‐What? Doug, what are you doing?
‐(CROWD CLAMORS)
632
00:25:03,377 --> 00:25:04,962
‐You're such an idiot.
‐I'm whispering so we're‐‐
633
00:25:05,045 --> 00:25:06,964
‐(OVERLAPPING CHATTER)
‐Shh, shh, shh‐‐
634
00:25:07,047 --> 00:25:08,757
(SHOUTS IN AMERICAN ACCENT)
Quiet!
635
00:25:08,841 --> 00:25:10,884
You... chattering...
636
00:25:11,427 --> 00:25:12,803
fucks!
637
00:25:12,886 --> 00:25:13,846
(SOFTLY)
Can you hear me?
638
00:25:13,929 --> 00:25:15,055
‐Yes.
‐I can.
639
00:25:15,139 --> 00:25:17,141
‐What about now?
‐Yes. It was the same.
640
00:25:17,224 --> 00:25:18,225
(WHISPERS) What about now?
641
00:25:18,308 --> 00:25:19,268
‐Too low.
‐Too low.
642
00:25:19,351 --> 00:25:20,394
Okay, I'll go up.
643
00:25:20,477 --> 00:25:22,104
‐(FRANK SNEEZES)
‐RYAN: Bless you.
644
00:25:22,187 --> 00:25:23,772
‐(SNEEZES)
‐DOUG: Oxygen‐‐
645
00:25:23,856 --> 00:25:24,982
‐(COUGHS)
‐MAN 2: Fuck!
646
00:25:25,065 --> 00:25:26,233
Shut up, Frank!
647
00:25:27,818 --> 00:25:28,986
‐Now that you have‐‐
‐(SNEEZES)
648
00:25:29,069 --> 00:25:30,946
‐DOUG: Guys. Please. Guys.
‐Oh, my God.
649
00:25:31,030 --> 00:25:32,573
DOUG: That's like a full tank.
650
00:25:34,700 --> 00:25:37,327
You have to think
before you speak.
651
00:25:37,411 --> 00:25:38,787
And then, think again.
652
00:25:38,871 --> 00:25:41,206
And then think,
"I shouldn't speak."
653
00:25:41,290 --> 00:25:43,625
And then, don't speak.
654
00:25:44,585 --> 00:25:45,753
‐(LOUD BEEP)
‐Iris!
655
00:25:45,836 --> 00:25:47,004
‐Fuck you, Doug!
‐Hey, you.
656
00:25:47,087 --> 00:25:48,338
What are NEPs?
657
00:25:48,422 --> 00:25:50,174
They're non‐essential personnel.
658
00:25:50,257 --> 00:25:51,550
‐MAN 3: What?!
‐I‐‐
659
00:25:52,634 --> 00:25:55,054
(ENGLISH ACCENT)
Iris, will you shut the fuck up?
660
00:25:55,137 --> 00:25:58,057
Is it true? You're just gonna
kill 500 passengers?
661
00:25:58,140 --> 00:25:59,933
Why wasn't I notified?
662
00:26:00,768 --> 00:26:02,311
Was I notified?
663
00:26:02,394 --> 00:26:03,604
When was I notified?
664
00:26:03,687 --> 00:26:06,607
Who are you to determine
who is essential?
665
00:26:06,690 --> 00:26:10,152
I can't go. I'm the only
radiologist in outer space.
666
00:26:10,235 --> 00:26:11,862
Darrell, I'm standing
right here!
667
00:26:11,945 --> 00:26:14,740
We've been colleagues for years!
668
00:26:14,823 --> 00:26:16,825
(WHISPERING)
It's not an oxygen beep.
669
00:26:16,909 --> 00:26:19,203
(LAUGHING)
It's not an oxygen beep!
670
00:26:19,286 --> 00:26:21,872
I checked all the tanks,
and the beeping
671
00:26:21,955 --> 00:26:25,334
is the ship telling us
to recalibrate for the baby.
672
00:26:25,417 --> 00:26:27,544
‐(KAREN GASPS)
‐There's an extra passenger.
673
00:26:27,628 --> 00:26:29,046
It needs to recalibrate.
674
00:26:29,129 --> 00:26:30,047
There's no oxygen‐‐
675
00:26:30,130 --> 00:26:31,340
SPIKE: That would be
the other reason.
676
00:26:31,423 --> 00:26:32,800
‐MAN 4: Oh, my‐‐
‐What, you‐‐ you didn't
677
00:26:32,883 --> 00:26:35,135
‐rule that out already, huh?
‐Shut up, Spike.
678
00:26:35,219 --> 00:26:37,179
BILLIE: There is air.
There is enough air
679
00:26:37,262 --> 00:26:40,349
for maybe some of you
to thank me. I'm Billie.
680
00:26:40,432 --> 00:26:41,517
(LOUDLY) We have air?
681
00:26:41,600 --> 00:26:43,727
‐Yeah, we have air.
‐So we can shout?
682
00:26:43,811 --> 00:26:45,312
If you want to, I guess, yes.
683
00:26:45,395 --> 00:26:46,897
(SHOUTING)
You guys were trying to kill us!
684
00:26:46,980 --> 00:26:48,482
Yeah, you had a list going!
Guess what?
685
00:26:48,565 --> 00:26:50,067
Now we're gonna make
a fucking list!
686
00:26:50,150 --> 00:26:52,319
‐And you all...
‐I don't even care about names,
687
00:26:52,402 --> 00:26:53,529
I just want blood.
688
00:26:53,612 --> 00:26:55,739
And... light 'em up!
689
00:26:55,823 --> 00:26:57,574
‐♪ (MYSTICAL MUSIC PLAYS) ♪
‐(ALL GASP)
690
00:26:57,658 --> 00:26:59,910
‐MAN 5: Oh, my...
‐WOMAN 2: Oh!
691
00:26:59,993 --> 00:27:01,453
RYAN: Wow.
692
00:27:01,537 --> 00:27:03,539
Oh, my God, it's beautiful!
693
00:27:04,998 --> 00:27:06,291
BILLIE: It is beautiful.
694
00:27:07,417 --> 00:27:09,253
Until you really think about it.
695
00:27:09,336 --> 00:27:12,089
Who knew shit
could be so enchanting?
696
00:27:12,172 --> 00:27:14,883
Me. I did. I knew.
697
00:27:14,967 --> 00:27:19,304
He's transformed the most
disgusting thing imaginable
698
00:27:19,388 --> 00:27:23,308
into a kaleidoscope
of butt truffles!
699
00:27:23,392 --> 00:27:26,687
Well, you gotta say,
he knows his audience.
700
00:27:26,770 --> 00:27:29,690
So... he lives.
For tonight.
701
00:27:29,773 --> 00:27:31,149
RYAN: (AMERICAN ACCENT)
Okay, it's over.
702
00:27:31,233 --> 00:27:32,484
The nightmare is over.
703
00:27:32,568 --> 00:27:35,320
This‐‐ this part
of the nightmare is over.
704
00:27:35,404 --> 00:27:38,282
(DOUG AND MIA ARGUING)
705
00:27:38,365 --> 00:27:40,158
MATT: Congratulations.
706
00:27:40,242 --> 00:27:42,619
Why don't you give yourself
a little pat on the back,
707
00:27:42,703 --> 00:27:44,204
or the ass?
708
00:27:44,288 --> 00:27:47,291
Give your ass a little squeeze,
and then...
709
00:27:47,374 --> 00:27:49,960
go make love to yourself
in a sleazy motel.
710
00:27:50,043 --> 00:27:51,044
(GRUNTS)
711
00:27:51,879 --> 00:27:52,963
You earned it.
712
00:27:53,046 --> 00:27:54,298
You're really fucking weird,
dude.
713
00:27:54,381 --> 00:27:55,924
I don't wanna
do these hangouts anymore.
714
00:27:56,008 --> 00:27:57,467
They make me kinda sick.
715
00:27:57,551 --> 00:27:59,720
‐That's okay.
‐JUDD: No, it isn't.
716
00:28:02,848 --> 00:28:04,892
‐(IRIS SIGHS)
‐(JUDD GRUNTS)
717
00:28:07,561 --> 00:28:10,188
Your ears are beautiful.
718
00:28:11,064 --> 00:28:12,065
To me.
719
00:28:14,192 --> 00:28:16,904
It's the most plausible
he's looked in weeks.
720
00:28:23,827 --> 00:28:25,913
I'm gonna miss talking to ya,
sweetie.
721
00:28:34,004 --> 00:28:37,090
‐(SNORING)
‐♪ (MUSIC PLAYS) ♪
722
00:29:37,484 --> 00:29:38,568
MAN:
I actually see a face there.
723
00:29:38,652 --> 00:29:40,779
MAN 2: I see the pope's face,
Pope John Paul II.
724
00:29:41,029 --> 00:29:42,739
J.P. was one of the good ones,
too.
725
00:29:42,990 --> 00:29:44,491
Wasn't even a Nazi in his youth.
726
00:29:44,574 --> 00:29:45,659
♪ (GOSPEL MUSIC PLAYS) ♪
727
00:29:45,951 --> 00:29:49,663
There's been talk about ejecting
500 people from the ship.
728
00:29:50,080 --> 00:29:52,416
‐It is the talk of Satan.
‐Oh, cast him out!
729
00:29:52,499 --> 00:29:54,668
‐(CROWD CHEERS)
‐Amen!
730
00:29:56,461 --> 00:29:57,546
RYAN CLARK: Who is Harrison?
731
00:29:57,629 --> 00:29:59,297
Oh, that's just somebody
that I'm not scared of.
732
00:29:59,381 --> 00:30:00,382
(STARTLED GASP)
733
00:30:00,465 --> 00:30:01,842
I suppose you are head
of mission control.
734
00:30:01,925 --> 00:30:03,510
And I guess what... you know,
they're saying,
735
00:30:03,593 --> 00:30:07,055
is that you're not...
in control... of the mission.
736
00:30:08,181 --> 00:30:11,351
♪ Oh, Lord ♪