1 00:00:01,449 --> 00:00:02,174 >> PREVIOUSLY ON 2 00:00:02,174 --> 00:00:03,658 RUPAUL'S DRAG RACE... 3 00:00:03,658 --> 00:00:06,040 I AM LAUNCHING MY FIRST-EVER 4 00:00:06,040 --> 00:00:08,629 MAKEUP LINE, AND I NEED YOU 5 00:00:08,629 --> 00:00:09,802 TO MARKET IT. 6 00:00:09,802 --> 00:00:12,564 YOU'LL BE WORKING IN PAIRS. 7 00:00:12,564 --> 00:00:13,668 >> WE'RE TOO BUSY PAINTING 8 00:00:13,668 --> 00:00:15,670 OUR OWN FACES INSTEAD OF THEIRS. 9 00:00:15,670 --> 00:00:17,845 >> A SICKENING SWEEP OF BLUSH 10 00:00:17,845 --> 00:00:18,915 HELPS DISTRACT FROM 11 00:00:18,915 --> 00:00:20,606 UNSIGHTLY SCARS. 12 00:00:20,606 --> 00:00:22,160 >> BEN DE LA, WE'RE HIDING 13 00:00:22,160 --> 00:00:23,851 BEHIND ANOTHER COSTUME. 14 00:00:23,851 --> 00:00:26,371 I HAVE NO IDEA WHO YOU ARE. 15 00:00:26,371 --> 00:00:27,855 LAGANJA, THE CROTCH 16 00:00:27,855 --> 00:00:28,890 IS A LITTLE LOW. 17 00:00:28,890 --> 00:00:29,926 YOUR HAIR IS UNEVEN. 18 00:00:29,926 --> 00:00:31,652 IT'S FLOPPING. 19 00:00:31,652 --> 00:00:32,480 >> WE'VE GOT, LIKE, 20 00:00:32,480 --> 00:00:33,412 A LITTLE SISTER VIBE GOING. 21 00:00:33,412 --> 00:00:34,103 SHE'S THE LITTLE SISTER. 22 00:00:34,103 --> 00:00:34,896 >> I'M THE LOW-RENT VERSION 23 00:00:34,896 --> 00:00:35,794 OF COURTNEY. 24 00:00:35,794 --> 00:00:37,106 >> I MAY HAVE USED THAT TERM 25 00:00:37,106 --> 00:00:38,245 ONCE. 26 00:00:38,245 --> 00:00:40,764 >> ADORE AND LAGANJA, YOU'RE THE 27 00:00:40,764 --> 00:00:43,008 WINNER OF THIS WEEK'S CHALLENGE. 28 00:00:43,008 --> 00:00:44,734 >> DARIENNE LAKE, SHANTE, 29 00:00:44,734 --> 00:00:46,425 YOU STAY. 30 00:00:46,425 --> 00:00:47,461 BEN DE LA CREME, 31 00:00:47,461 --> 00:00:48,772 YOUR TIME HERE 32 00:00:48,772 --> 00:00:51,085 IS NOT OVER. 33 00:00:51,085 --> 00:00:52,880 SHANTE, YOU STAY. 34 00:00:52,880 --> 00:00:53,812 >> YEAH. 35 00:00:53,812 --> 00:00:54,502 >> WHOO-OO! 36 00:00:54,502 --> 00:00:56,539 >> WHOO-OO! [applause] 37 00:00:56,539 --> 00:00:59,956 [applause] 38 00:00:59,956 --> 00:01:03,408 >> OH, WHEW. 39 00:01:03,408 --> 00:01:04,271 >> WELL, THAT WAS SOMETHING. 40 00:01:04,271 --> 00:01:05,030 I'M GLAD WE DIDN'T HAVE 41 00:01:05,030 --> 00:01:05,824 TO GO HOME. 42 00:01:05,824 --> 00:01:07,929 >> ME TOO. 43 00:01:07,929 --> 00:01:09,276 I HAVE NO WORDS. 44 00:01:09,276 --> 00:01:10,346 [laughs] 45 00:01:10,346 --> 00:01:13,107 I'M SO SCARED THAT I CAME THAT 46 00:01:13,107 --> 00:01:17,698 CLOSE TO LEAVING SO SOON. 47 00:01:17,698 --> 00:01:19,251 [sighs] 48 00:01:19,251 --> 00:01:21,253 WELL, I THANK EVERYONE WHO 49 00:01:21,253 --> 00:01:22,461 GASPED IN THE BACKGROUND 50 00:01:22,461 --> 00:01:24,843 WHEN I DIDN'T LOOK 51 00:01:24,843 --> 00:01:25,809 LIKE I WAS STAYING. 52 00:01:25,809 --> 00:01:27,328 APPRECIATED THAT. 53 00:01:27,328 --> 00:01:28,812 >> I WAS GONNA CAUSE A RIOT 54 00:01:28,812 --> 00:01:29,744 IF SHE SENT YOU HOME. 55 00:01:29,744 --> 00:01:31,884 I WAS LIKE, "NO, YOU'VE MADE 56 00:01:31,884 --> 00:01:33,300 THE WRONG DECISION." 57 00:01:33,300 --> 00:01:35,716 THE WRONG DECISION." [record scratches] 58 00:01:35,716 --> 00:01:38,857 [record scratches] 59 00:01:38,857 --> 00:01:39,651 >> ARE YOU NOT GONNA 60 00:01:39,651 --> 00:01:42,171 CONGRATULATE ADORE AND I? 61 00:01:42,171 --> 00:01:43,103 DO YOU THINK THAT WE DIDN'T 62 00:01:43,103 --> 00:01:44,380 DESERVE TO WIN AS A TEAM? 63 00:01:44,380 --> 00:01:45,415 >> I DIDN'T THINK THAT 64 00:01:45,415 --> 00:01:47,383 YOU SHOULD HAVE WON. 65 00:01:47,383 --> 00:01:48,384 >> I'M SURE MANY OF MY 66 00:01:48,384 --> 00:01:49,557 COMPETITORS FELT THAT ADORE 67 00:01:49,557 --> 00:01:51,318 CARRIED ME FOR THIS WIN, BUT AT 68 00:01:51,318 --> 00:01:52,457 THE END OF THE DAY, SHE'S 69 00:01:52,457 --> 00:01:53,665 STANDING IN AN 80s SWEATER AND 70 00:01:53,665 --> 00:01:56,081 A SKIRT FROM FOREVER 21, AND I 71 00:01:56,081 --> 00:01:58,118 A SKIRT FROM FOREVER 21, AND I SPENT A LOT OF TIME ON MY LOOK. 72 00:01:58,118 --> 00:02:00,396 SPENT A LOT OF TIME ON MY LOOK. 73 00:02:00,396 --> 00:02:01,224 >> JOSLYN, I MEAN, 74 00:02:01,224 --> 00:02:02,639 YOU'RE BEING VERY QUIET. 75 00:02:02,639 --> 00:02:05,539 WHAT'S GOING ON? 76 00:02:05,539 --> 00:02:07,196 >> TONIGHT IN THE SILVER LOUNGE, 77 00:02:07,196 --> 00:02:08,404 COURTNEY READ MY LOOK. 78 00:02:08,404 --> 00:02:10,095 >> I JUST THINK THAT YOUR DRAG 79 00:02:10,095 --> 00:02:12,753 ISN'T AS POLISHED AS THE OTHER 80 00:02:12,753 --> 00:02:13,581 DRAG IN THE COMPETITION 81 00:02:13,581 --> 00:02:16,066 RIGHT NOW. 82 00:02:16,066 --> 00:02:17,067 >> DO YOU GUYS REALLY FEEL LIKE 83 00:02:17,067 --> 00:02:17,723 I SHOULDN'T BE HERE? 84 00:02:17,723 --> 00:02:18,379 >> NO, NO, NO, NOT AT ALL. 85 00:02:18,379 --> 00:02:19,104 >> I THINK YOU DESERVE 86 00:02:19,104 --> 00:02:19,932 TO BE HERE. 87 00:02:19,932 --> 00:02:21,141 >> I DO FEEL THAT THE LOOK 88 00:02:21,141 --> 00:02:23,557 TONIGHT WASN'T EXECUTED AS WELL 89 00:02:23,557 --> 00:02:27,250 AS THE VISION IN YOUR HEAD, 90 00:02:27,250 --> 00:02:28,113 BUT IF YOU WANT ANYTHING, I GOT 91 00:02:28,113 --> 00:02:30,115 A WHOLE BOX FULL OF [bleep]. 92 00:02:30,115 --> 00:02:30,909 >> I'VE GOT A WHOLE RACK 93 00:02:30,909 --> 00:02:35,120 OF THINGS. 94 00:02:35,120 --> 00:02:37,226 >> I'VE BEEN DOING DRAG FOR 13 95 00:02:37,226 --> 00:02:39,366 YEARS, AND I'M NOT BEING MEAN. 96 00:02:39,366 --> 00:02:41,195 I'M JUST BEING FACTUAL. 97 00:02:41,195 --> 00:02:42,783 BUT I DIDN'T MEAN IT IN ANY WAY 98 00:02:42,783 --> 00:02:44,302 TO HURT HER FEELINGS. 99 00:02:44,302 --> 00:02:45,372 I DON'T WANT YOU TO THINK THAT 100 00:02:45,372 --> 00:02:47,512 I WAS SAYING THAT YOU WEREN'T 101 00:02:47,512 --> 00:02:48,237 DESERVING OF BEING 102 00:02:48,237 --> 00:02:49,514 IN THE COMPETITION. 103 00:02:49,514 --> 00:02:51,136 >> I THINK BECAUSE I HAVE SUCH 104 00:02:51,136 --> 00:02:52,551 A BIG RESPECT FOR YOU, IT MAKES 105 00:02:52,551 --> 00:02:53,794 ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MYSELF. 106 00:02:53,794 --> 00:02:55,071 LIKE, I NEED YOU TO UNDERSTAND, 107 00:02:55,071 --> 00:02:58,074 LIKE, THAT HURT ME REALLY BAD. 108 00:02:58,074 --> 00:02:59,903 NOTHING ELSE HAS HURT ME SINCE 109 00:02:59,903 --> 00:03:00,939 I'VE BEEN IN THIS COMPETITION 110 00:03:00,939 --> 00:03:02,182 THAN WHEN YOU TOLD ME THAT 111 00:03:02,182 --> 00:03:05,046 I LOOKED UNPOLISHED. 112 00:03:05,046 --> 00:03:05,944 >> IF YOU NEED ANY HELP OR 113 00:03:05,944 --> 00:03:07,221 ANYTHING, I'M JUST TRYING TO 114 00:03:07,221 --> 00:03:08,809 OFFER A HAND BECAUSE I WOULD 115 00:03:08,809 --> 00:03:11,467 LIKE TO SEE YOU DO EVEN BETTER. 116 00:03:11,467 --> 00:03:12,537 >> NO, AND I APPRECIATE YOU 117 00:03:12,537 --> 00:03:13,710 OFFERING ME HELP, BUT I JUST-- 118 00:03:13,710 --> 00:03:14,918 I CAN'T HELP BUT TAKE IT 119 00:03:14,918 --> 00:03:16,265 AS PATRONIZING ALMOST. 120 00:03:16,265 --> 00:03:17,576 >> WELL, I MEAN, I GUESS IT IS 121 00:03:17,576 --> 00:03:19,889 A LITTLE BIT. 122 00:03:19,889 --> 00:03:20,993 >> AT THIS POINT, I DON'T KNOW 123 00:03:20,993 --> 00:03:21,787 IF I LOOK UP TO COURTNEY 124 00:03:21,787 --> 00:03:22,719 AS MUCH. 125 00:03:22,719 --> 00:03:23,927 THIS IS NOT ABOUT MAKING 126 00:03:23,927 --> 00:03:24,790 FRIENDS. 127 00:03:24,790 --> 00:03:26,999 FRIENDS. NOW IT'S GAME ON. 128 00:03:26,999 --> 00:03:31,107 NOW IT'S GAME ON. 129 00:03:31,107 --> 00:03:32,142 >> ♪ RUPAUL DRAG RACE♪ 130 00:03:32,142 --> 00:03:32,936 >> THE WINNER OF RUPAUL'S 131 00:03:32,936 --> 00:03:33,972 DRAG RACERECEIVES 132 00:03:33,972 --> 00:03:34,938 A SICKENING SUPPLY OF 133 00:03:34,938 --> 00:03:36,733 COLOREVOLUTION COSMETICS 134 00:03:36,733 --> 00:03:40,358 AND A CASH PRIZE OF $100,000. 135 00:03:40,358 --> 00:03:42,429 WITH EXTRA SPECIAL GUEST JUDGES 136 00:03:42,429 --> 00:03:43,430 BRUCE VILANCH 137 00:03:43,430 --> 00:03:44,120 AND JAIME PRESSLY. 138 00:03:44,120 --> 00:03:45,121 >> ♪ RUPAUL DRAG RACE♪ 139 00:03:45,121 --> 00:03:46,467 >> ♪ MAY THE BEST WOMAN 140 00:03:46,467 --> 00:03:49,021 >> ♪ MAY THE BEST WOMAN ♪ BEST WOMAN WIN 141 00:03:49,021 --> 00:03:51,817 ♪ BEST WOMAN WIN 142 00:03:51,817 --> 00:03:54,475 >> COME ON, CLOUD NINE REALNESS. 143 00:03:54,475 --> 00:03:55,165 YEAH. 144 00:03:55,165 --> 00:03:56,270 >> I'M STILL HERE. 145 00:03:56,270 --> 00:03:57,927 >> YAY! 146 00:03:57,927 --> 00:03:59,722 >> I AM REALLY EXCITED FOR A NEW 147 00:03:59,722 --> 00:04:01,517 DAY, A NEW CHALLENGE, A NEW 148 00:04:01,517 --> 00:04:03,484 CHANCE TO PROVE MYSELF. 149 00:04:03,484 --> 00:04:05,452 >> AND THEN THERE WERE EIGHT. 150 00:04:05,452 --> 00:04:06,142 >> AGAIN. 151 00:04:06,142 --> 00:04:08,213 >> [harshly lilting] OKAY. 152 00:04:08,213 --> 00:04:09,352 YOU CAN ROLL YOUR EYES, MAMA. 153 00:04:09,352 --> 00:04:10,077 >> OKAY, YOU KNOW WHAT? 154 00:04:10,077 --> 00:04:11,112 I'M NOT YOUR MAMA. 155 00:04:11,112 --> 00:04:12,700 MY NAME IS BIANCA. 156 00:04:12,700 --> 00:04:14,357 LAGANJA'S FEELING HER FANTASY. 157 00:04:14,357 --> 00:04:15,151 "YES, FIERCE. 158 00:04:15,151 --> 00:04:15,807 YES, MAMA. 159 00:04:15,807 --> 00:04:16,463 BLAH, BLAH, BLAH." 160 00:04:16,463 --> 00:04:17,464 NO, I'M OVER IT. 161 00:04:17,464 --> 00:04:18,154 [Shemail alert wails] 162 00:04:18,154 --> 00:04:18,810 >> OOH! 163 00:04:18,810 --> 00:04:19,466 >> THANK YOU, JESUS. 164 00:04:19,466 --> 00:04:20,156 [laughter] 165 00:04:20,156 --> 00:04:21,813 LET'S ROLL, MAMA. 166 00:04:21,813 --> 00:04:23,573 >> YOU'VE GOT SHEMAIL. 167 00:04:23,573 --> 00:04:25,782 HEY, YOU CRAZY CHARACTERS. 168 00:04:25,782 --> 00:04:27,232 NOW, TO BECOME AMERICA'S NEXT 169 00:04:27,232 --> 00:04:30,925 DRAG SUPERSTAR, JUST DO YOU, 170 00:04:30,925 --> 00:04:32,099 BUT BE CAREFUL, 171 00:04:32,099 --> 00:04:34,515 BECAUSE IF YOU DO YOU TOO OFTEN, 172 00:04:34,515 --> 00:04:37,277 YOU MIGHT JUST GO BLIND. 173 00:04:37,277 --> 00:04:39,969 IT'S NOT FUNNY! 174 00:04:39,969 --> 00:04:42,143 >> THIS ONE'S GOT ME STUMPED. 175 00:04:42,143 --> 00:04:43,524 >> HELLO, HELLO, HELLO. 176 00:04:43,524 --> 00:04:44,836 >> all: HI. 177 00:04:44,836 --> 00:04:45,733 >> HI. 178 00:04:45,733 --> 00:04:47,321 NOW, AMERICA'S NEXT DRAG 179 00:04:47,321 --> 00:04:50,669 SUPERSTAR HAS TO LOOK SICKENING 180 00:04:50,669 --> 00:04:52,084 FROM EVERY ANGLE. 181 00:04:52,084 --> 00:04:54,570 SO FOR TODAY'S MINI CHALLENGE, 182 00:04:54,570 --> 00:04:56,503 YOU'LL BE LIP-SYNCHING UPSIDE 183 00:04:56,503 --> 00:04:59,160 DOWN AND LYING ON YOUR BACK... 184 00:04:59,160 --> 00:05:00,438 >> OH, GOD. 185 00:05:00,438 --> 00:05:01,301 >> WHICH I'M SURE 186 00:05:01,301 --> 00:05:02,129 YOU'VE ALL DONE BEFORE. 187 00:05:02,129 --> 00:05:02,785 [laughter] 188 00:05:02,785 --> 00:05:04,165 >> OKAY. 189 00:05:04,165 --> 00:05:04,890 >> [in singsong voice] OH, 190 00:05:04,890 --> 00:05:08,308 SCRUFF PIT CREW. 191 00:05:08,308 --> 00:05:08,963 [contestants grunting 192 00:05:08,963 --> 00:05:09,619 rhythmically] 193 00:05:09,619 --> 00:05:11,311 WHERE ARE THEY? 194 00:05:11,311 --> 00:05:13,796 OH, THEY'RE ONLY 20 FEET AWAY 195 00:05:13,796 --> 00:05:14,969 FROM MY CURRENT LOCATION. 196 00:05:14,969 --> 00:05:15,867 [laughter] 197 00:05:15,867 --> 00:05:16,730 OH. 198 00:05:16,730 --> 00:05:17,869 >> all: OH. 199 00:05:17,869 --> 00:05:19,249 >> WELL, HELLO. 200 00:05:19,249 --> 00:05:21,700 >> USING THE MATERIALS PROVIDED, 201 00:05:21,700 --> 00:05:22,943 YOU'LL NEED TO DRAG UP 202 00:05:22,943 --> 00:05:23,702 YOUR CHIN... 203 00:05:23,702 --> 00:05:24,841 >> AH! 204 00:05:24,841 --> 00:05:26,222 >> LIKE IT'S YOUR FACE. 205 00:05:26,222 --> 00:05:27,154 >> YAY. 206 00:05:27,154 --> 00:05:28,017 >> [laughs] 207 00:05:28,017 --> 00:05:30,675 >> READY, SET, GO. 208 00:05:30,675 --> 00:05:31,676 [pop music] 209 00:05:31,676 --> 00:05:36,336 ♪ 210 00:05:36,336 --> 00:05:38,476 FIRST, BIANCA DEL RIO. 211 00:05:38,476 --> 00:05:40,340 [applause] 212 00:05:40,340 --> 00:05:41,755 CHIN UP, BIANCA. 213 00:05:41,755 --> 00:05:43,343 >> [laughs] 214 00:05:43,343 --> 00:05:45,137 >> HIT IT. 215 00:05:45,137 --> 00:05:46,242 >> ♪ I'M FED UP 216 00:05:46,242 --> 00:05:46,967 ♪ WITH A STUPID WORLD 217 00:05:46,967 --> 00:05:49,038 >> [laughing] 218 00:05:49,038 --> 00:05:50,384 >> ♪ WHERE'S MY DUMMY GUN 219 00:05:50,384 --> 00:05:51,351 ♪ SHOOT 'EM UP 220 00:05:51,351 --> 00:05:52,455 ♪ BANG, BANG, BANG 221 00:05:52,455 --> 00:05:56,425 ♪ I SAY WE FORGET THE NOISE 222 00:05:56,425 --> 00:05:57,218 ♪ TAKE 'EM ONE BY ONE 223 00:05:57,218 --> 00:05:57,874 [laughter] 224 00:05:57,874 --> 00:05:58,841 ♪ GET IT DONE 225 00:05:58,841 --> 00:06:00,325 ♪ HEY, HEY, HEY 226 00:06:00,325 --> 00:06:01,671 ♪ HIGH SOCIETY 227 00:06:01,671 --> 00:06:02,362 >> ♪ BETTER WHEN 228 00:06:02,362 --> 00:06:03,880 ♪ WE'RE LEFT ALONE 229 00:06:03,880 --> 00:06:05,365 >> ♪ THE HYPOCRISY 230 00:06:05,365 --> 00:06:06,469 >> ♪ SAYING THAT YOU WILL 231 00:06:06,469 --> 00:06:07,781 ♪ BUT YOU WON'T 232 00:06:07,781 --> 00:06:09,058 >> ♪ THE AUDACITY 233 00:06:09,058 --> 00:06:09,783 >> ♪ TELL US THAT 234 00:06:09,783 --> 00:06:11,371 ♪ OUR LOVE IS WRONG 235 00:06:11,371 --> 00:06:12,717 ♪ GET YOUR REBEL ON 236 00:06:12,717 --> 00:06:14,097 >> ♪ OH, OH, OH 237 00:06:14,097 --> 00:06:15,513 ♪ SO STAND UP 238 00:06:15,513 --> 00:06:16,686 >> TRINITY'S CHIN LOOKS LIKE 239 00:06:16,686 --> 00:06:17,687 VIVACIOUS. 240 00:06:17,687 --> 00:06:18,861 IT'S SO FUNNY. 241 00:06:18,861 --> 00:06:19,689 [laughs] 242 00:06:19,689 --> 00:06:21,415 >> ♪ HOW YOU WANT TO LOVE 243 00:06:21,415 --> 00:06:23,175 ♪ AND RAISE YOUR VOICES 244 00:06:23,175 --> 00:06:25,039 ♪ SING A BATTLE SONG 245 00:06:25,039 --> 00:06:26,800 ♪ A REVOLUTION 246 00:06:26,800 --> 00:06:27,973 ♪ GET YOUR REBEL ON 247 00:06:27,973 --> 00:06:32,461 >> [laughing] 248 00:06:32,461 --> 00:06:34,186 ONE OF YOU STOOD OUT BY 249 00:06:34,186 --> 00:06:35,809 THE HAIR PIECE ON YOUR 250 00:06:35,809 --> 00:06:38,777 CHIN-Y CHIN CHIN. 251 00:06:38,777 --> 00:06:40,089 JOSLYN FOX. 252 00:06:40,089 --> 00:06:42,712 [applause] 253 00:06:42,712 --> 00:06:44,507 >> CONDRAGULATIONS, 254 00:06:44,507 --> 00:06:45,681 THE FOX THAT ROCKS. 255 00:06:45,681 --> 00:06:46,716 >> THANK YOU, RU. 256 00:06:46,716 --> 00:06:48,787 >> NOW, LADIES, FOR TODAY'S MAIN 257 00:06:48,787 --> 00:06:51,134 CHALLENGE, YOU'LL BE PERFORMING 258 00:06:51,134 --> 00:06:52,860 A GOOD OLD-FASHIONED 259 00:06:52,860 --> 00:06:54,931 COMEDY SHOW, 260 00:06:54,931 --> 00:06:57,934 #DRAGQUEENSOFCOMEDY. 261 00:06:57,934 --> 00:06:59,833 EACH OF YOU NEEDS TO WRITE AND 262 00:06:59,833 --> 00:07:02,560 PERFORM A STAND-UP COMEDY. 263 00:07:02,560 --> 00:07:04,665 >> HURRICANE BIANCA'S IN TOWN. 264 00:07:04,665 --> 00:07:06,736 NO ONE IS SAFE. 265 00:07:06,736 --> 00:07:08,289 >> NOW, JOSLYN, SINCE YOU WON 266 00:07:08,289 --> 00:07:09,946 THE MINI CHALLENGE, YOU GET TO 267 00:07:09,946 --> 00:07:12,915 PICK THE ORDER OF THE LINEUP. 268 00:07:12,915 --> 00:07:14,710 NOW, I WANT YOU TO USE YOUR 269 00:07:14,710 --> 00:07:16,815 CHARISMA, UNIQUENESS, NERVE, AND 270 00:07:16,815 --> 00:07:19,646 TALENT TO TICKLE MY FUNNY BONE. 271 00:07:19,646 --> 00:07:21,717 IT'S RIGHT HERE WHERE MY RIB 272 00:07:21,717 --> 00:07:22,407 USED TO BE. 273 00:07:22,407 --> 00:07:24,271 [laughter] 274 00:07:24,271 --> 00:07:25,375 >> SO, GENTLEMEN, 275 00:07:25,375 --> 00:07:27,032 START YOUR ENGINES, 276 00:07:27,032 --> 00:07:29,828 AND MAY THE BEST WOMAN WIN. 277 00:07:29,828 --> 00:07:31,140 >> ALL RIGHT, LET'S DO THIS, 278 00:07:31,140 --> 00:07:33,176 >> ALL RIGHT, LET'S DO THIS, LADIES. 279 00:07:33,176 --> 00:07:37,526 LADIES. 280 00:07:37,526 --> 00:07:38,319 >> ALL RIGHT. 281 00:07:38,319 --> 00:07:40,425 "COURTNEY IS AN ASS[bleep]." 282 00:07:40,425 --> 00:07:41,391 OH, MY GOD, NOW, THAT'S 283 00:07:41,391 --> 00:07:42,185 A GUARANTEED LAUGH. 284 00:07:42,185 --> 00:07:43,290 >> [laughs] 285 00:07:43,290 --> 00:07:44,325 >> ARE THERE TWO "R"s 286 00:07:44,325 --> 00:07:45,085 IN YOUR NAME? 287 00:07:45,085 --> 00:07:45,982 >> WHY, ARE YOU MAKING JOKES 288 00:07:45,982 --> 00:07:46,673 ABOUT ME? 289 00:07:46,673 --> 00:07:47,846 >> NO, I'M JUST MAKING A LIST OF 290 00:07:47,846 --> 00:07:49,089 ALL THE GIRLS SO I CAN THINK 291 00:07:49,089 --> 00:07:49,883 ABOUT THE ORDER 292 00:07:49,883 --> 00:07:51,022 I'MA PUT YOU ALL IN. 293 00:07:51,022 --> 00:07:51,816 >> SO HERE'S WHAT YOU DO, 294 00:07:51,816 --> 00:07:52,472 JOSLYN. 295 00:07:52,472 --> 00:07:53,852 YOU PUT BIANCA ON FIRST, AND 296 00:07:53,852 --> 00:07:54,750 THEN WHOEVER YOU WANT TO THROW 297 00:07:54,750 --> 00:07:55,992 UNDER THE BUS YOU PUT SECOND. 298 00:07:55,992 --> 00:07:56,993 >> [laughs] 299 00:07:56,993 --> 00:07:58,236 >> THEN YOU PUT ME SECOND LAST 300 00:07:58,236 --> 00:08:00,100 AND YOU LAST. 301 00:08:00,100 --> 00:08:01,722 >> THAT'S JUST SHADY. 302 00:08:01,722 --> 00:08:02,896 YESTERDAY YOU WERE SUGGESTING 303 00:08:02,896 --> 00:08:03,966 THAT HER DRAG WAS UGLY. 304 00:08:03,966 --> 00:08:04,656 TODAY YOU'RE TELLING HER 305 00:08:04,656 --> 00:08:05,554 HOW TO DO A LINEUP. 306 00:08:05,554 --> 00:08:06,555 >> YEAH, ISN'T THAT FUNNY? 307 00:08:06,555 --> 00:08:08,591 >> YOU ARE A SHADY [bleep]. 308 00:08:08,591 --> 00:08:10,628 >> YOU ARE A SHADY [bleep]. >> LOVE YOU, JOSLYN. 309 00:08:10,628 --> 00:08:18,290 >> LOVE YOU, JOSLYN. 310 00:08:18,290 --> 00:08:19,291 [quirky music] 311 00:08:19,291 --> 00:08:23,088 >> [mouthing words] 312 00:08:23,088 --> 00:08:30,855 ♪ 313 00:08:30,855 --> 00:08:32,373 >> DE LA'S REALLY FREAKING 314 00:08:32,373 --> 00:08:33,513 ME OUT RIGHT NOW. 315 00:08:33,513 --> 00:08:34,375 THIS BITCH IS TALKING 316 00:08:34,375 --> 00:08:35,480 TO HERSELF. 317 00:08:35,480 --> 00:08:36,654 I WAS LIKE, "BITCH, I THOUGHT I 318 00:08:36,654 --> 00:08:39,001 WAS THE CRAZY ONE UP IN HERE." 319 00:08:39,001 --> 00:08:39,657 >> WHAT DO YOU HAVE, 320 00:08:39,657 --> 00:08:42,418 BEN DE LA? 321 00:08:42,418 --> 00:08:43,626 >> I THINK THAT I'M GONNA GO 322 00:08:43,626 --> 00:08:44,972 WITH SOMETHING THAT'S SORT OF 323 00:08:44,972 --> 00:08:46,180 MORE A BLANKET PERSONAL 324 00:08:46,180 --> 00:08:46,974 NARRATIVE. 325 00:08:46,974 --> 00:08:51,427 >> [laughing] 326 00:08:51,427 --> 00:08:53,463 >> [laughing] KNEE-SLAPPER. 327 00:08:53,463 --> 00:08:56,328 KNEE-SLAPPER. 328 00:08:56,328 --> 00:08:57,537 >> I GET TO DECIDE THE ORDER 329 00:08:57,537 --> 00:08:59,124 THE GIRLS PERFORM IN. 330 00:08:59,124 --> 00:09:01,851 THE GIRLS PERFORM IN. FIRST UP, OPENING THE SHOW... 331 00:09:01,851 --> 00:09:03,715 FIRST UP, OPENING THE SHOW... 332 00:09:03,715 --> 00:09:05,752 FIRST UP, OPENING THE SHOW... >> [laughs] 333 00:09:05,752 --> 00:09:07,477 >> [laughs] 334 00:09:07,477 --> 00:09:11,274 >> [laughs] 335 00:09:11,274 --> 00:09:12,793 >> TODAY WE'RE GETTING READY FOR 336 00:09:12,793 --> 00:09:14,554 OUR STAND-UP COMEDY ROUTINE 337 00:09:14,554 --> 00:09:16,383 IN FRONT OF A LIVE AUDIENCE. 338 00:09:16,383 --> 00:09:18,558 THIS IS DEFINITELY ONE OF THE 339 00:09:18,558 --> 00:09:19,731 HARDEST CHALLENGES OF THE 340 00:09:19,731 --> 00:09:21,284 COMPETITION SO FAR. 341 00:09:21,284 --> 00:09:22,941 >> ADORE, ARE YOU GONNA WRITE 342 00:09:22,941 --> 00:09:23,804 MATERIAL, OR ARE YOU JUST GONNA 343 00:09:23,804 --> 00:09:24,943 WRITE A CARD FOR GUIDELINES 344 00:09:24,943 --> 00:09:27,532 SAYING "COOL, AWESOME, CHOLA, 345 00:09:27,532 --> 00:09:28,740 MY MOM, LIBRA?" 346 00:09:28,740 --> 00:09:29,430 >> "PARTY." 347 00:09:29,430 --> 00:09:30,086 >> "PARTY." 348 00:09:30,086 --> 00:09:30,742 [laughs] 349 00:09:30,742 --> 00:09:31,709 >> [bleep] OFF. 350 00:09:31,709 --> 00:09:33,711 >> [bleep] OFF. [bleep] ALL THE WAY OFF. 351 00:09:33,711 --> 00:09:38,025 [bleep] ALL THE WAY OFF. 352 00:09:38,025 --> 00:09:40,096 >> [bleep]. 353 00:09:40,096 --> 00:09:40,752 >> SO WHAT ARE YOU 354 00:09:40,752 --> 00:09:41,442 GONNA DO, JOS? 355 00:09:41,442 --> 00:09:42,271 HAVE YOU GOT ANY IDEAS? 356 00:09:42,271 --> 00:09:43,893 >> WHEN I WAIT TABLES, LIKE, 357 00:09:43,893 --> 00:09:45,032 THAT'S, LIKE, MY OPPORTUNITY TO 358 00:09:45,032 --> 00:09:45,826 BE A STAND-UP COMEDIAN, 359 00:09:45,826 --> 00:09:46,965 SO I'M ALWAYS CRACKING JOKES. 360 00:09:46,965 --> 00:09:48,553 IF SOMEBODY ORDERS A JUMBO 361 00:09:48,553 --> 00:09:50,037 SHRIMP COCKTAIL, I'LL SAY, 362 00:09:50,037 --> 00:09:51,383 "I HOPE YOU'RE NOT ALLERGIC." 363 00:09:51,383 --> 00:09:52,315 AND THEY'LL SAY, "TO WHAT?" 364 00:09:52,315 --> 00:09:55,422 AND I'LL SAY, "TO AN OXYMORON." 365 00:09:55,422 --> 00:09:57,769 JUMBO SHRIMP. 366 00:09:57,769 --> 00:09:58,805 >> PREGNANT PAUSE. 367 00:09:58,805 --> 00:10:00,116 PREGNANT PAUSE. 368 00:10:00,116 --> 00:10:01,014 >> [laughs] 369 00:10:01,014 --> 00:10:02,463 >> I KNOW THAT STAND-UP COMEDY 370 00:10:02,463 --> 00:10:05,363 IS NOT MY CUP OF SOUP-- 371 00:10:05,363 --> 00:10:06,019 CUP OF TEA-- 372 00:10:06,019 --> 00:10:07,607 CUP OF BOWL OF WHAT? 373 00:10:07,607 --> 00:10:08,469 CUP OF TEA. 374 00:10:08,469 --> 00:10:10,057 THIS IS NOT MY CUP OF TEA. 375 00:10:10,057 --> 00:10:11,541 [laughs] 376 00:10:11,541 --> 00:10:12,370 >> WHERE DID-- 377 00:10:12,370 --> 00:10:13,751 WHERE DID LAGANJA GO? 378 00:10:13,751 --> 00:10:14,648 >> I DON'T KNOW. 379 00:10:14,648 --> 00:10:18,169 >> LAGANJA, ARE YOU HERE? 380 00:10:18,169 --> 00:10:19,757 OH, OH, WELL. 381 00:10:19,757 --> 00:10:20,792 >> YES, GIRL. 382 00:10:20,792 --> 00:10:24,347 OKAY. 383 00:10:24,347 --> 00:10:25,003 >> I LOVE IT. 384 00:10:25,003 --> 00:10:26,211 SHE'S UNDER THE TABLE. 385 00:10:26,211 --> 00:10:28,213 >> HOW Y'ALL DOING? 386 00:10:28,213 --> 00:10:30,181 >> OH, LET ME GET MORE ATTENTION 387 00:10:30,181 --> 00:10:31,803 LIKE THE BIG NO-SMOKING SIGN 388 00:10:31,803 --> 00:10:32,493 ON MY HEAD. 389 00:10:32,493 --> 00:10:34,012 LET ME GET UNDER A TABLE. 390 00:10:34,012 --> 00:10:35,531 REALLY, QUEEN? 391 00:10:35,531 --> 00:10:36,636 >> MY NAME IS MISS LAGANJA 392 00:10:36,636 --> 00:10:39,052 ESTRANJA, BUT YOU CAN CALL ME 393 00:10:39,052 --> 00:10:41,571 MISS MARY JANE, LITTLE MISS 420, 394 00:10:41,571 --> 00:10:42,745 OR FOR MY LATIN FOLK IN THE 395 00:10:42,745 --> 00:10:44,885 AUDIENCE, LA MARIJUANA. 396 00:10:44,885 --> 00:10:46,300 I THINK IN THIS COMPETITION 397 00:10:46,300 --> 00:10:47,854 YOU HAVE TO STAND OUT 398 00:10:47,854 --> 00:10:49,165 AND BE A BOLD CHARACTER. 399 00:10:49,165 --> 00:10:50,408 THIS IS THE PERFECT CHALLENGE 400 00:10:50,408 --> 00:10:52,375 TO SHOWCASE LAGANJA. 401 00:10:52,375 --> 00:10:53,791 HONEY, I AM GONNA GIVE YOU 402 00:10:53,791 --> 00:10:55,137 STONER REALNESS. 403 00:10:55,137 --> 00:10:56,276 NOW, GIRL, IF IT AIN'T GREEN, 404 00:10:56,276 --> 00:10:59,866 WELL, GIRL, I'M NOT INTERESTED. 405 00:10:59,866 --> 00:11:01,522 I NEED A TRANSITION. 406 00:11:01,522 --> 00:11:02,765 >> THE JUDGES SAY THAT 407 00:11:02,765 --> 00:11:04,560 I'M HIDING BEHIND A CHARACTER, 408 00:11:04,560 --> 00:11:06,631 BUT I THINK LAGANJA IS MAYBE 409 00:11:06,631 --> 00:11:08,426 THE PERSON WHO'S ACTUALLY AFRAID 410 00:11:08,426 --> 00:11:10,670 TO BE EXPOSED RIGHT NOW. 411 00:11:10,670 --> 00:11:11,843 >> HOW YOU DOING, DE LA? 412 00:11:11,843 --> 00:11:13,293 >> OH, I'M PLUGGING AWAY. 413 00:11:13,293 --> 00:11:14,294 HOW ARE YOU? 414 00:11:14,294 --> 00:11:15,675 >> GIRL, I'M JUST TRYING TO, 415 00:11:15,675 --> 00:11:17,159 YOU KNOW, REMEMBER WHAT IT WAS 416 00:11:17,159 --> 00:11:18,816 LIKE TO BE IN A TENT AND JUST, 417 00:11:18,816 --> 00:11:19,782 YOU KNOW, REALLY CHANNEL 418 00:11:19,782 --> 00:11:21,059 THAT INNER CHILD. 419 00:11:21,059 --> 00:11:22,233 OKAY. 420 00:11:22,233 --> 00:11:24,028 >> THIS PERSON IS NOT THE 421 00:11:24,028 --> 00:11:25,615 LAGANJA THAT I KNOW, AND IT'S 422 00:11:25,615 --> 00:11:26,858 FREAKING ME THE HELL OUT. 423 00:11:26,858 --> 00:11:29,585 >> OKAY? 424 00:11:29,585 --> 00:11:31,207 >> HELLO, HELLO, HELLO. 425 00:11:31,207 --> 00:11:32,726 >> all: HI. 426 00:11:32,726 --> 00:11:34,210 >> HOW ARE MY DRAG QUEENS 427 00:11:34,210 --> 00:11:35,384 OF COMEDY? 428 00:11:35,384 --> 00:11:36,523 >> HILARIOUS. 429 00:11:36,523 --> 00:11:37,904 >> YUCK-A, YUCK-A, YUCK. 430 00:11:37,904 --> 00:11:39,629 [laughs] 431 00:11:39,629 --> 00:11:40,838 HEY, DE LA. 432 00:11:40,838 --> 00:11:41,873 >> HI, RU. 433 00:11:41,873 --> 00:11:43,081 >> NOW, LAST WEEK YOU WERE 434 00:11:43,081 --> 00:11:44,151 IN THE BOTTOM TWO. 435 00:11:44,151 --> 00:11:44,807 >> YES, I WAS. 436 00:11:44,807 --> 00:11:45,670 >> DO YOU FEEL A LOT OF PRESSURE 437 00:11:45,670 --> 00:11:47,430 TO BOUNCE BACK FROM ALL THAT? 438 00:11:47,430 --> 00:11:48,362 >> I DEFINITELY DO. 439 00:11:48,362 --> 00:11:51,331 YEAH, I WAS REALLY DEVASTATED 440 00:11:51,331 --> 00:11:52,470 TO BE DOWN THERE. 441 00:11:52,470 --> 00:11:54,092 >> WHAT ARE YOU THE MOST 442 00:11:54,092 --> 00:11:55,300 NERVOUS ABOUT? 443 00:11:55,300 --> 00:11:58,096 >> I, YOU KNOW, DON'T HAVE 444 00:11:58,096 --> 00:11:59,684 ZINGY ONE-LINERS. 445 00:11:59,684 --> 00:12:00,547 I CONSIDER MY HUMOR 446 00:12:00,547 --> 00:12:01,686 TO BE VERY CHARACTER-BASED. 447 00:12:01,686 --> 00:12:02,825 >> YOU KNOW, THERE WAS THE NOTE 448 00:12:02,825 --> 00:12:04,758 FROM MICHELLE THAT SHE DIDN'T 449 00:12:04,758 --> 00:12:06,726 KNOW WHO YOU ARE, 450 00:12:06,726 --> 00:12:07,761 BECAUSE YOU DO A CHARACTER. 451 00:12:07,761 --> 00:12:08,451 >> YEAH. 452 00:12:08,451 --> 00:12:09,625 >> BUT ON AN EMOTIONAL LEVEL, 453 00:12:09,625 --> 00:12:10,660 THAT THAT WASN'T COMING THROUGH. 454 00:12:10,660 --> 00:12:11,972 >> BUT I ALSO FEEL LIKE THIS IS 455 00:12:11,972 --> 00:12:13,318 THE PERFECT CHALLENGE FOR ME TO 456 00:12:13,318 --> 00:12:14,837 HAVE THE OPPORTUNITY TO DO THAT. 457 00:12:14,837 --> 00:12:16,321 >> WELL, I LOOK FORWARD TO IT. 458 00:12:16,321 --> 00:12:17,081 GET BACK TO WORK. 459 00:12:17,081 --> 00:12:17,737 >> THANK YOU, RU. 460 00:12:17,737 --> 00:12:19,669 >> ALL RIGHT. 461 00:12:19,669 --> 00:12:21,395 WELL, HELLO, MISS BIANCA. 462 00:12:21,395 --> 00:12:22,293 >> HI. 463 00:12:22,293 --> 00:12:23,743 >> EVERYONE'S LOOKING TO YOU 464 00:12:23,743 --> 00:12:24,985 TO BE THE STANDOUT 465 00:12:24,985 --> 00:12:26,124 IN THIS CHALLENGE. 466 00:12:26,124 --> 00:12:27,677 DOES THAT MAKE YOU NERVOUS? 467 00:12:27,677 --> 00:12:28,817 >> CONCERNED, YEAH. 468 00:12:28,817 --> 00:12:30,163 >> BUT YOU'RE VERY FUNNY. 469 00:12:30,163 --> 00:12:31,095 >> BUT FOR ME, IT'S MORE 470 00:12:31,095 --> 00:12:32,406 OBSERVATIONS AND IN THE MOMENT, 471 00:12:32,406 --> 00:12:33,407 AND I DON'T DO WELL WITH 472 00:12:33,407 --> 00:12:35,271 SITTING DOWN AND WRITING, 473 00:12:35,271 --> 00:12:36,238 "HERE IS A JOKE." 474 00:12:36,238 --> 00:12:37,480 >> NOW, IN THE PAST, YOU'VE 475 00:12:37,480 --> 00:12:38,999 ACTUALLY HELPED A LOT OF QUEENS 476 00:12:38,999 --> 00:12:39,897 IN THIS COMPETITION. 477 00:12:39,897 --> 00:12:40,587 >> YEAH. 478 00:12:40,587 --> 00:12:41,691 >> WHO'S HELPING YOU OUT? 479 00:12:41,691 --> 00:12:42,900 >> WELL, THEY'RE ALL HELPING ME 480 00:12:42,900 --> 00:12:43,866 OUT BY BEING HORRIBLE 481 00:12:43,866 --> 00:12:44,625 AND MAKING ME LOOK BETTER. 482 00:12:44,625 --> 00:12:45,765 >> [laughs] 483 00:12:45,765 --> 00:12:46,696 >> AND I'M NOT JUST A NASTY 484 00:12:46,696 --> 00:12:47,352 [bleep]. 485 00:12:47,352 --> 00:12:48,043 I WILL HELP THEM PACK 486 00:12:48,043 --> 00:12:48,733 TO GO HOME. 487 00:12:48,733 --> 00:12:50,700 [laughter] 488 00:12:50,700 --> 00:12:51,529 I MEAN, YOU DON'T EVEN GOT TO 489 00:12:51,529 --> 00:12:52,495 FOLD SOME OF THE [bleep] 490 00:12:52,495 --> 00:12:53,151 THEY'RE WEARING. 491 00:12:53,151 --> 00:12:54,739 YOU JUST BALL IT UP. 492 00:12:54,739 --> 00:12:55,947 "PUT THAT IN BAG NUMBER FIVE, 493 00:12:55,947 --> 00:12:56,637 BITCH. 494 00:12:56,637 --> 00:12:57,500 GET TO STEPPING." 495 00:12:57,500 --> 00:12:58,985 >> ALL RIGHT, SEE YOU OUT THERE. 496 00:12:58,985 --> 00:12:59,744 >> THANK YOU. 497 00:12:59,744 --> 00:13:00,607 THIS CHALLENGE IS REALLY 498 00:13:00,607 --> 00:13:01,608 A [bleep] OR GET OFF THE POT 499 00:13:01,608 --> 00:13:02,712 MOMENT, SO LET'S HOPE 500 00:13:02,712 --> 00:13:05,370 I CAN DELIVER A NICE, BIG TURD. 501 00:13:05,370 --> 00:13:07,476 >> TRINITY K. BONET, 502 00:13:07,476 --> 00:13:08,132 HEY, MAMA. 503 00:13:08,132 --> 00:13:08,788 >> HI. 504 00:13:08,788 --> 00:13:09,754 >> HAVE YOU EVER DONE STAND-UP 505 00:13:09,754 --> 00:13:10,582 BEFORE? 506 00:13:10,582 --> 00:13:11,411 >> NO. 507 00:13:11,411 --> 00:13:15,933 >> DO YOU KNOW ANY JOKES? 508 00:13:15,933 --> 00:13:17,279 >> I CAN'T TELL YOU EXACTLY WHAT 509 00:13:17,279 --> 00:13:18,245 IT'S GONNA BE RIGHT NOW, 510 00:13:18,245 --> 00:13:19,868 BUT WHEN I FEEL LIKE I HAVE 511 00:13:19,868 --> 00:13:21,076 A MAGNIFYING GLASS OVER ME 512 00:13:21,076 --> 00:13:21,870 OR SOMETHING, 513 00:13:21,870 --> 00:13:25,459 THAT'S WHEN IT GETS HARD. 514 00:13:25,459 --> 00:13:26,115 >> I KNOW WHAT 515 00:13:26,115 --> 00:13:27,289 YOU'RE CAPABLE OF. 516 00:13:27,289 --> 00:13:28,428 IN THE LAST CHALLENGE, 517 00:13:28,428 --> 00:13:30,464 YOUR COMEDY CAME OUT, BUT IT'S 518 00:13:30,464 --> 00:13:32,363 INTERESTING THAT ALMOST BY HABIT 519 00:13:32,363 --> 00:13:33,882 YOU SHUT DOWN. 520 00:13:33,882 --> 00:13:34,572 >> I DON'T KNOW. 521 00:13:34,572 --> 00:13:35,366 IT'S JUST ALMOST SOMETHING 522 00:13:35,366 --> 00:13:36,160 I CAN'T CONTROL. 523 00:13:36,160 --> 00:13:38,300 YOU JUST--YOU ARE WHO YOU ARE. 524 00:13:38,300 --> 00:13:38,956 >> I KNOW THAT THERE'S 525 00:13:38,956 --> 00:13:39,888 A BLOCK THERE, 526 00:13:39,888 --> 00:13:42,269 AND SO THAT'S FOR YOU TO UNLOCK. 527 00:13:42,269 --> 00:13:43,477 DON'T LET THE MOMENT 528 00:13:43,477 --> 00:13:44,962 PASS YOU BY. 529 00:13:44,962 --> 00:13:46,135 ALL RIGHT, TRINITY, 530 00:13:46,135 --> 00:13:47,412 I'M COUNTING ON YOU. 531 00:13:47,412 --> 00:13:49,173 >> RU IS COUNTING ON ME TO 532 00:13:49,173 --> 00:13:50,519 DELIVER SOMETHING THAT HE KNOW 533 00:13:50,519 --> 00:13:52,555 DELIVER SOMETHING THAT HE KNOW DAMN WELL I CAN'T DO. 534 00:13:52,555 --> 00:13:55,662 DAMN WELL I CAN'T DO. 535 00:13:55,662 --> 00:13:57,353 >> ALL RIGHT, LADIES, 536 00:13:57,353 --> 00:13:58,734 GATHER ROUND. 537 00:13:58,734 --> 00:14:00,287 TO PROVE THAT YOUR COMEDY HAS 538 00:14:00,287 --> 00:14:03,532 A BROAD APPEAL, I'VE INVITED 539 00:14:03,532 --> 00:14:05,430 A SENIOR CITIZENS GROUP 540 00:14:05,430 --> 00:14:06,846 TO JOIN US. 541 00:14:06,846 --> 00:14:08,433 YES, THEY WILL BE SITTING 542 00:14:08,433 --> 00:14:11,851 FRONT AND CENTER. 543 00:14:11,851 --> 00:14:12,921 I TOLD YOU IT WAS GONNA BE 544 00:14:12,921 --> 00:14:15,682 AN OLD-FASHIONED COMEDY SHOW. 545 00:14:15,682 --> 00:14:17,511 MAKE 'EM LAUGH. 546 00:14:17,511 --> 00:14:19,030 >> ANYONE CLOSE TO ME KNOWS THAT 547 00:14:19,030 --> 00:14:20,721 [bleep], BITCH, [bleep], DAMN, 548 00:14:20,721 --> 00:14:21,515 [bleep], AND ASS 549 00:14:21,515 --> 00:14:23,172 ARE MY FAVORITE WORDS TO USE. 550 00:14:23,172 --> 00:14:25,450 [laughs] 551 00:14:25,450 --> 00:14:27,521 I'M [bleep]. 552 00:14:27,521 --> 00:14:28,488 >> GENTLEMEN, 553 00:14:28,488 --> 00:14:29,869 START YOUR ENGINES... 554 00:14:29,869 --> 00:14:30,593 [in slurred, aged voice] 555 00:14:30,593 --> 00:14:33,251 [in slurred, aged voice] AND MAY THE BEST WOMAN WIN. 556 00:14:33,251 --> 00:14:39,913 AND MAY THE BEST WOMAN WIN. 557 00:14:39,913 --> 00:14:42,329 >> SO IS ANYONE CURIOUS AS TO 558 00:14:42,329 --> 00:14:43,779 THE ORDER I'VE PUT US ALL IN? 559 00:14:43,779 --> 00:14:44,607 >> OOH, YES. 560 00:14:44,607 --> 00:14:45,608 >> OH, GOD. 561 00:14:45,608 --> 00:14:46,644 >> BECAUSE I WON THE MINI 562 00:14:46,644 --> 00:14:48,128 CHALLENGE TODAY, I GET TO DECIDE 563 00:14:48,128 --> 00:14:49,647 THE ORDER THAT THE GIRLS PERFORM 564 00:14:49,647 --> 00:14:51,718 IN FOR THE COMEDY SHOW. 565 00:14:51,718 --> 00:14:55,308 OKAY, NOW, FIRST UP, WE WILL 566 00:14:55,308 --> 00:14:57,172 BE OPENING THE SHOW WITH 567 00:14:57,172 --> 00:14:59,519 NONE OTHER THAN THE INCOMPARABLE 568 00:14:59,519 --> 00:15:00,830 DARIENNE LAKE. 569 00:15:00,830 --> 00:15:02,004 >> all: YAY. 570 00:15:02,004 --> 00:15:03,350 [applause] 571 00:15:03,350 --> 00:15:05,663 >> FOLLOWING DARIENNE IS 572 00:15:05,663 --> 00:15:08,010 COURTNEY ACT. 573 00:15:08,010 --> 00:15:09,805 >> JOSLYN IS A SHADY 574 00:15:09,805 --> 00:15:10,840 LITTLE CHARACTER. 575 00:15:10,840 --> 00:15:11,496 >> [chuckles] 576 00:15:11,496 --> 00:15:13,429 >> SHE'S DUMB LIKE A FOX, BUT 577 00:15:13,429 --> 00:15:15,121 BECAUSE I'M FOLLOWING DARIENNE, 578 00:15:15,121 --> 00:15:16,018 I HAVE TO MAKE SURE THAT 579 00:15:16,018 --> 00:15:17,468 I'M VERY FUNNY. 580 00:15:17,468 --> 00:15:18,469 >> AND COURTNEY WILL BE 581 00:15:18,469 --> 00:15:20,609 INTRODUCING OUR THIRD PERFORMER, 582 00:15:20,609 --> 00:15:22,162 ADORE. 583 00:15:22,162 --> 00:15:22,922 >> YES. 584 00:15:22,922 --> 00:15:24,544 >> FOLLOWING ADORE WILL BE 585 00:15:24,544 --> 00:15:25,925 MISS BEN DE LA CREME. 586 00:15:25,925 --> 00:15:26,580 >> ALL RIGHT. 587 00:15:26,580 --> 00:15:27,857 >> AND THEN IN OUR FIFTH SLOT, 588 00:15:27,857 --> 00:15:29,825 IT'S LAGANJA ESTRANJA. 589 00:15:29,825 --> 00:15:31,344 >> OOH. 590 00:15:31,344 --> 00:15:32,932 >> AFTER LAGANJA WILL BE 591 00:15:32,932 --> 00:15:34,726 MISS TRINITY K. BONET. 592 00:15:34,726 --> 00:15:35,865 FOLLOWING TRINITY WILL BE THE 593 00:15:35,865 --> 00:15:37,798 FUNNIEST GIRL OF THE WHOLE BIT, 594 00:15:37,798 --> 00:15:39,076 MS. JOSLYN F-- 595 00:15:39,076 --> 00:15:39,904 OH, THAT'S ME. 596 00:15:39,904 --> 00:15:41,423 [laughter] 597 00:15:41,423 --> 00:15:42,838 AND THEN CLOSING THE SHOW 598 00:15:42,838 --> 00:15:43,632 WILL BE THE OLDEST 599 00:15:43,632 --> 00:15:44,288 OF ALL THE QUEENS... 600 00:15:44,288 --> 00:15:44,944 >> [laughs] 601 00:15:44,944 --> 00:15:46,842 >> MISS BIANCA DEL RIO. 602 00:15:46,842 --> 00:15:47,705 >> YEAH. 603 00:15:47,705 --> 00:15:49,189 >> LET'S HOPE I CAN STAY AWAKE 604 00:15:49,189 --> 00:15:51,191 >> LET'S HOPE I CAN STAY AWAKE TILL I GO ON. 605 00:15:51,191 --> 00:15:52,261 TILL I GO ON. 606 00:15:52,261 --> 00:15:53,331 [cheers and applause] 607 00:15:53,331 --> 00:15:54,470 >> I KNOW WE GOT SOME OLD PEOPLE 608 00:15:54,470 --> 00:15:56,369 HERE IN THE AUDIENCE TONIGHT. 609 00:15:56,369 --> 00:15:57,749 YEAH, DID YOU GUYS ALL 610 00:15:57,749 --> 00:15:59,786 YEAH, DID YOU GUYS ALL COME TOGETHER ON THE ARK? 611 00:15:59,786 --> 00:16:01,719 COME TOGETHER ON THE ARK? 612 00:16:01,719 --> 00:16:03,755 COME TOGETHER ON THE ARK? >> [laughs] 613 00:16:03,755 --> 00:16:05,481 >> [laughs] 614 00:16:05,481 --> 00:16:07,518 >> [laughs] >> [laughs] 615 00:16:07,518 --> 00:16:10,797 >> [laughs] 616 00:16:10,797 --> 00:16:13,110 >> I AM SPARKLE TOSS. 617 00:16:13,110 --> 00:16:15,319 >> IT'S COMEDY. 618 00:16:15,319 --> 00:16:16,182 >> TODAY WE HAVE TO DO 619 00:16:16,182 --> 00:16:17,562 A STAND-UP ROUTINE IN FRONT OF 620 00:16:17,562 --> 00:16:18,529 A LIVE AUDIENCE. 621 00:16:18,529 --> 00:16:20,600 I'VE NEVER DONE ONE, LET ALONE 622 00:16:20,600 --> 00:16:22,050 IN FRONT OF THE ELDERLY. 623 00:16:22,050 --> 00:16:22,982 FOR ME, THIS IS THE TYPE OF 624 00:16:22,982 --> 00:16:24,259 CHALLENGE THAT'S PROBABLY-- 625 00:16:24,259 --> 00:16:26,088 IT'S GONNA BE ROUGH. 626 00:16:26,088 --> 00:16:27,745 >> SO JOSY JO-STICKS, 627 00:16:27,745 --> 00:16:29,609 DO YOU HAVE ANY OLD PEOPLE 628 00:16:29,609 --> 00:16:30,506 THAT YOU RELATE TO? 629 00:16:30,506 --> 00:16:31,611 >> I'M VERY CLOSE WITH MY 630 00:16:31,611 --> 00:16:33,302 GRANDPARENTS, AND THEY'VE ALWAYS 631 00:16:33,302 --> 00:16:34,683 BEEN VERY SUPPORTIVE OF ME. 632 00:16:34,683 --> 00:16:35,373 >> OH, THAT'S COOL. 633 00:16:35,373 --> 00:16:36,443 >> AND MY GRANDFATHER WAS, 634 00:16:36,443 --> 00:16:38,169 YOU KNOW, ALWAYS MY BIGGEST FAN. 635 00:16:38,169 --> 00:16:38,963 >> AW. 636 00:16:38,963 --> 00:16:40,792 >> AND I REMEMBER, HE HAD READ 637 00:16:40,792 --> 00:16:42,104 ABOUT A BROADWAY STAR. 638 00:16:42,104 --> 00:16:44,520 SHE WAS UP FOR HER FIRST TONY. 639 00:16:44,520 --> 00:16:46,005 THEN SHE OVERHEARD SOME OF THE 640 00:16:46,005 --> 00:16:47,868 OTHER NOMINEES SAYING HOW BIG OF 641 00:16:47,868 --> 00:16:49,560 A JOKE SHE WAS AND THAT SHE 642 00:16:49,560 --> 00:16:51,010 DIDN'T DESERVE TO BE NOMINATED, 643 00:16:51,010 --> 00:16:52,011 AND THERE'S NO WAY SHE WAS GOING 644 00:16:52,011 --> 00:16:52,666 TO WIN. 645 00:16:52,666 --> 00:16:53,529 AND SHE SAID SHE GOT REALLY DOWN 646 00:16:53,529 --> 00:16:55,566 ON HERSELF AND WENT BACK OUT 647 00:16:55,566 --> 00:16:56,843 THERE COMPLETELY FEELING 648 00:16:56,843 --> 00:16:59,052 DEFEATED, AND THEN SHE WON 649 00:16:59,052 --> 00:17:00,433 THE TONY. 650 00:17:00,433 --> 00:17:01,675 I REMEMBER HIM BRINGING ME 651 00:17:01,675 --> 00:17:02,711 THAT ARTICLE AND SAYING, 652 00:17:02,711 --> 00:17:03,884 "YOU CAN BE THAT SAME PERSON. 653 00:17:03,884 --> 00:17:05,334 YOU HAVE WHAT IT TAKES." 654 00:17:05,334 --> 00:17:07,440 THIS IS KIND OF LIKE MY F.U. 655 00:17:07,440 --> 00:17:08,889 TO ALL THE PEOPLE WHO THOUGHT 656 00:17:08,889 --> 00:17:11,237 I COULDN'T SUCCEED IN IT. 657 00:17:11,237 --> 00:17:14,516 AND I JUST--I CAN'T WAIT TO HEAR 658 00:17:14,516 --> 00:17:15,551 WHAT HE HAS TO SAY, 'CAUSE 659 00:17:15,551 --> 00:17:16,794 I KNOW HE'LL BE PROUDER 660 00:17:16,794 --> 00:17:17,726 THAN ANYONE ELSE. 661 00:17:17,726 --> 00:17:19,762 THAN ANYONE ELSE. >> OH, THAT'S NICE. 662 00:17:19,762 --> 00:17:22,972 >> OH, THAT'S NICE. 663 00:17:22,972 --> 00:17:24,353 >> BIANCA, YOU HAVE ANY WORRIES 664 00:17:24,353 --> 00:17:25,044 AT ALL? 665 00:17:25,044 --> 00:17:25,803 >> I DON'T [bleep] 666 00:17:25,803 --> 00:17:26,562 KNOW, YOU KNOW. 667 00:17:26,562 --> 00:17:27,805 >> WHAT'S YOUR WORST NIGHTMARE 668 00:17:27,805 --> 00:17:28,737 OF GOING OUT THERE? 669 00:17:28,737 --> 00:17:29,979 >> MY WORST NIGHTMARE IS SITTING 670 00:17:29,979 --> 00:17:31,395 NEXT TO YOU LIKE WE ARE NOW. 671 00:17:31,395 --> 00:17:32,051 >> [gasps] 672 00:17:32,051 --> 00:17:33,466 [laughter] 673 00:17:33,466 --> 00:17:34,915 >> YOU'RE, LIKE, EVIL NICE. 674 00:17:34,915 --> 00:17:36,055 LIKE, WHAT'S WITH THAT? 675 00:17:36,055 --> 00:17:36,986 LIKE, YOU CAN'T HATE YOU 'CAUSE 676 00:17:36,986 --> 00:17:38,057 YOU'RE HELPFUL, AND YOU'RE 677 00:17:38,057 --> 00:17:39,886 SWEET, BUT YOU'RE TRUTHFUL. 678 00:17:39,886 --> 00:17:40,714 BUT YOU'RE A DICK. 679 00:17:40,714 --> 00:17:41,646 >> NOW, IF YOU'D SAID THIS 680 00:17:41,646 --> 00:17:42,716 ON DAY ONE, I WOULD HAVE BEEN 681 00:17:42,716 --> 00:17:43,510 YOUR FRIEND. 682 00:17:43,510 --> 00:17:44,442 IT'S AMAZING WE GET THIS CLOSE, 683 00:17:44,442 --> 00:17:46,099 AND YOU'RE LEAVING TODAY. 684 00:17:46,099 --> 00:17:47,135 >> WHAT? 685 00:17:47,135 --> 00:17:49,068 >> [laughs] 686 00:17:49,068 --> 00:17:51,070 >> [laughs] >> I [bleep] HATE YOU. 687 00:17:51,070 --> 00:17:53,382 >> I [bleep] HATE YOU. 688 00:17:53,382 --> 00:17:54,383 [pop music] 689 00:17:54,383 --> 00:18:00,631 ♪ 690 00:18:00,631 --> 00:18:03,323 >> [laughing] 691 00:18:03,323 --> 00:18:06,395 ♪ 692 00:18:06,395 --> 00:18:08,087 ♪ COVER GIRL 693 00:18:08,087 --> 00:18:10,192 ♪ PUT THE BASS IN YOUR WALK 694 00:18:10,192 --> 00:18:11,711 ♪ HEAD TO TOE 695 00:18:11,711 --> 00:18:14,714 ♪ LET YOUR WHOLE BODY TALK 696 00:18:14,714 --> 00:18:17,026 ♪ AND WHAT? 697 00:18:17,026 --> 00:18:18,649 WELCOME TO THE MAIN STAGE 698 00:18:18,649 --> 00:18:20,547 OF RUPAUL'S CHUCKLE HUT. 699 00:18:20,547 --> 00:18:22,101 [laughter] 700 00:18:22,101 --> 00:18:24,448 L.O.L., IT'S MICHELLE VISAGE. 701 00:18:24,448 --> 00:18:26,760 >> THE FIERCE FLOWER IS CLEARLY 702 00:18:26,760 --> 00:18:27,968 IN BLOOM TONIGHT. 703 00:18:27,968 --> 00:18:29,038 >> [laughs] 704 00:18:29,038 --> 00:18:30,971 MY FAVORITE STRAIGHT MAN, 705 00:18:30,971 --> 00:18:32,249 SANTINO RICE. 706 00:18:32,249 --> 00:18:33,284 >> [laughs] 707 00:18:33,284 --> 00:18:35,114 BLOOMING GORGEOUS, RU. 708 00:18:35,114 --> 00:18:37,599 >> COMEDY LEGEND, BRUCE VILANCH. 709 00:18:37,599 --> 00:18:38,427 >> I'M GONNA COME OVER 710 00:18:38,427 --> 00:18:39,463 AND POLLINATE YOU. 711 00:18:39,463 --> 00:18:41,120 [laughter] 712 00:18:41,120 --> 00:18:42,569 >> I THOUGHT YOU'D NEVER ASK. 713 00:18:42,569 --> 00:18:44,123 AND JAIME PRESSLY. 714 00:18:44,123 --> 00:18:45,089 >> HELLO. 715 00:18:45,089 --> 00:18:47,195 >> HOW CAN ONE PERSON BE SO 716 00:18:47,195 --> 00:18:50,129 BEAUTIFUL AND SO FUNNY? 717 00:18:50,129 --> 00:18:51,544 I'M TALKING ABOUT MYSELF. 718 00:18:51,544 --> 00:18:52,303 >> CLEARLY. 719 00:18:52,303 --> 00:18:53,373 [laughter] 720 00:18:53,373 --> 00:18:55,134 >> J.K., MISS THING. 721 00:18:55,134 --> 00:18:56,065 WE ARE SO HAPPY 722 00:18:56,065 --> 00:18:57,412 TO HAVE YOU HERE. 723 00:18:57,412 --> 00:18:58,689 THIS WEEK WE CHALLENGED 724 00:18:58,689 --> 00:19:00,622 OUR QUEENS TO PUT ON A GOOD 725 00:19:00,622 --> 00:19:02,486 OLD-FASHIONED COMEDY SHOW, 726 00:19:02,486 --> 00:19:04,660 AND BOY, ARE MY ARMS TIRED. 727 00:19:04,660 --> 00:19:06,041 [laughter] 728 00:19:06,041 --> 00:19:08,526 GENTLEMEN, START YOUR ENGINES, 729 00:19:08,526 --> 00:19:11,391 AND MAY THE BEST WOMAN WIN. 730 00:19:11,391 --> 00:19:14,981 THE DRAG QUEENS OF COMEDY. 731 00:19:14,981 --> 00:19:18,018 THE DRAG QUEENS OF COMEDY. [cheers and applause] 732 00:19:18,018 --> 00:19:19,813 [cheers and applause] 733 00:19:19,813 --> 00:19:22,471 >> HEY. 734 00:19:22,471 --> 00:19:25,267 MY NAME IS MISS DARIENNE LAKE. 735 00:19:25,267 --> 00:19:26,165 I LIKE TO SAY MISS 'CAUSE IT 736 00:19:26,165 --> 00:19:28,374 LETS THE BOYS KNOW I'M SINGLE, 737 00:19:28,374 --> 00:19:29,513 YOU KNOW. 738 00:19:29,513 --> 00:19:30,962 OF COURSE, MY 14 CATS 739 00:19:30,962 --> 00:19:32,447 AND MY APPEARANCE ON 740 00:19:32,447 --> 00:19:33,896 HOARDERS: BURIED ALIVEMIGHT 741 00:19:33,896 --> 00:19:35,898 ALSO LET THEM KNOW I'M SINGLE. 742 00:19:35,898 --> 00:19:37,141 I ASKED MY MOTHER--I'M LIKE, 743 00:19:37,141 --> 00:19:38,487 "MOM, HOW DID I END UP 744 00:19:38,487 --> 00:19:39,385 SO TWISTED? 745 00:19:39,385 --> 00:19:40,903 LIKE, DID YOU, LIKE, DROP ME ON 746 00:19:40,903 --> 00:19:42,215 MY HEAD WHEN I WAS A BABY?" 747 00:19:42,215 --> 00:19:42,905 SHE WAS LIKE, 748 00:19:42,905 --> 00:19:43,768 "HONEY, YOU HAVE TO BE 749 00:19:43,768 --> 00:19:45,184 HELD TO BE DROPPED. ” 750 00:19:45,184 --> 00:19:49,188 [laughter] 751 00:19:49,188 --> 00:19:50,568 WELL, I AM HERE REPRESENTING 752 00:19:50,568 --> 00:19:52,570 ALL THE BIG AND CURVY GIRLS. 753 00:19:52,570 --> 00:19:55,194 >> HEY. 754 00:19:55,194 --> 00:19:56,540 >> I'M TRYING TO GET IN SHAPE. 755 00:19:56,540 --> 00:19:58,197 I MEAN--WELL, ROUND IS A SHAPE, 756 00:19:58,197 --> 00:19:58,887 YOU KNOW. 757 00:19:58,887 --> 00:20:00,199 [laughter] 758 00:20:00,199 --> 00:20:03,271 >> AT THE GYM, I'M LIKE A NINJA. 759 00:20:03,271 --> 00:20:04,824 YOU WILL NEVER SEE ME THERE. 760 00:20:04,824 --> 00:20:07,482 [laughter] 761 00:20:07,482 --> 00:20:08,483 I KNOW WE GOT SOME OLD PEOPLE 762 00:20:08,483 --> 00:20:10,312 HERE IN THE AUDIENCE TONIGHT. 763 00:20:10,312 --> 00:20:11,417 YES, HOW Y'ALL DOING? 764 00:20:11,417 --> 00:20:12,314 [cheers and applause] 765 00:20:12,314 --> 00:20:13,453 YEAH, DID YOU GUYS ALL COME 766 00:20:13,453 --> 00:20:14,523 TOGETHER 767 00:20:14,523 --> 00:20:15,524 ON THE ARK? 768 00:20:15,524 --> 00:20:16,870 [laughter] 769 00:20:16,870 --> 00:20:20,426 TELL NOAH I SAID HELLO. 770 00:20:20,426 --> 00:20:22,359 >> AS YOU MAY HAVE ALL GATHERED 771 00:20:22,359 --> 00:20:25,741 FROM MY ACCENT, I AM FROM IDAHO. 772 00:20:25,741 --> 00:20:26,570 [laughter] 773 00:20:26,570 --> 00:20:27,226 I'M KIDDING. 774 00:20:27,226 --> 00:20:30,159 I'M FROM AUSTRALIA, LAND OF 775 00:20:30,159 --> 00:20:32,300 KANGAROOS, LAND OF OLIVIA NEWTON 776 00:20:32,300 --> 00:20:34,233 JOHN, AND THROWING ALL THE 777 00:20:34,233 --> 00:20:35,372 SHRIMP ON THE BARBIE. 778 00:20:35,372 --> 00:20:36,062 >> YEAH. 779 00:20:36,062 --> 00:20:37,443 >> WELL, WHAT IF I DON'T WANT 780 00:20:37,443 --> 00:20:39,065 SHRIMP THROWN ON ME? 781 00:20:39,065 --> 00:20:39,824 [laughter] 782 00:20:39,824 --> 00:20:41,585 I WANT TO LOOK FISHY, 783 00:20:41,585 --> 00:20:42,551 NOT SMELL FISHY. 784 00:20:42,551 --> 00:20:44,312 [laughter] 785 00:20:44,312 --> 00:20:48,212 SO I MOVED TO AMERICA RECENTLY. 786 00:20:48,212 --> 00:20:50,214 I MOVED TO WEST HOLLYWOOD, AND 787 00:20:50,214 --> 00:20:51,215 I'VE WRITTEN A LITTLE BIT OF A 788 00:20:51,215 --> 00:20:52,630 SONG ABOUT SOME OF THE PEOPLE 789 00:20:52,630 --> 00:20:53,873 THAT I'VE MET THERE, AND I'D 790 00:20:53,873 --> 00:20:56,738 LIKE TO SING IT FOR YOU NOW. 791 00:20:56,738 --> 00:20:58,395 ♪ THEY'LL TAKE YOU DOWN 792 00:20:58,395 --> 00:20:59,948 ♪ WITH JUST ONE LOOK 793 00:20:59,948 --> 00:21:01,777 ♪ THEY HUNT IN PACKS 794 00:21:01,777 --> 00:21:03,296 ♪ THEY DON'T READ BOOKS 795 00:21:03,296 --> 00:21:04,918 ♪ INJECTABLE TANS 796 00:21:04,918 --> 00:21:06,472 ♪ AND NO TATTOOS 797 00:21:06,472 --> 00:21:08,197 ♪ TOO YOUNG FOR BOTOX 798 00:21:08,197 --> 00:21:10,993 ♪ GOT NOTHING TO LOSE 799 00:21:10,993 --> 00:21:12,512 ♪ THEY'RE THE MEAN GAYS 800 00:21:12,512 --> 00:21:14,514 ♪ THEY LIVE IN WEST HOLLYWOOD 801 00:21:14,514 --> 00:21:15,757 ♪ THEY'RE THE MEAN GAYS 802 00:21:15,757 --> 00:21:16,689 ♪ WELL, THEY WOULD 803 00:21:16,689 --> 00:21:17,379 ♪ IF THEY COULD 804 00:21:17,379 --> 00:21:18,932 ♪ I'M A MEAN GAY 805 00:21:18,932 --> 00:21:19,795 ♪ WELL, YOU WOULD 806 00:21:19,795 --> 00:21:20,555 ♪ IF YOU COULD 807 00:21:20,555 --> 00:21:21,590 ♪ I MIGHT LOOK NICE 808 00:21:21,590 --> 00:21:22,488 ♪ BUT DO THINK TWICE 809 00:21:22,488 --> 00:21:24,179 ♪ BEFORE YOU TAKE ME ON 810 00:21:24,179 --> 00:21:26,008 [cheers and applause] 811 00:21:26,008 --> 00:21:28,217 THANK YOU. 812 00:21:28,217 --> 00:21:30,599 >> HI, YOU'RE PROBABLY WONDERING 813 00:21:30,599 --> 00:21:31,876 WHY I LOOK LIKE A MEXICAN KATY 814 00:21:31,876 --> 00:21:33,637 PERRY RIGHT NOW, AREN'T YOU? 815 00:21:33,637 --> 00:21:34,810 MY MOTHER IS A CHOLA. 816 00:21:34,810 --> 00:21:35,432 DO YOU GUYS KNOW WHAT 817 00:21:35,432 --> 00:21:36,122 A CHOLA IS? 818 00:21:36,122 --> 00:21:37,744 CAN I GET A SHOW OF HANDS? 819 00:21:37,744 --> 00:21:39,263 YEAH, WE'RE IN L.A., 820 00:21:39,263 --> 00:21:39,953 MOTHER[bleep]. 821 00:21:39,953 --> 00:21:40,609 [laughter] 822 00:21:40,609 --> 00:21:43,957 YEAH, MY MOM'S A CHOLA, 823 00:21:43,957 --> 00:21:45,407 AND SHE LIKES BIG [bleep]. 824 00:21:45,407 --> 00:21:48,272 OKAY, NO, YEAH, I WAS REALLY 825 00:21:48,272 --> 00:21:49,722 SCARED WHEN I HEARD THAT SENIOR 826 00:21:49,722 --> 00:21:50,861 CITIZENS WERE GONNA BE IN THE 827 00:21:50,861 --> 00:21:53,139 [bleep] AUDIENCE TONIGHT, OKAY? 828 00:21:53,139 --> 00:21:54,658 JUST BLAME MY [bleep] GRANDMA 829 00:21:54,658 --> 00:21:55,521 BECAUSE SHE LIKES TO GO TO 830 00:21:55,521 --> 00:21:56,901 T.J. AND GET WORK DONE, SO I 831 00:21:56,901 --> 00:21:57,730 NEVER GRASPED THE CONCEPT 832 00:21:57,730 --> 00:21:59,248 TO RESPECT MY ELDERS. 833 00:21:59,248 --> 00:22:00,974 THE BITCH NEVER AGES. 834 00:22:00,974 --> 00:22:02,217 SHE HAS A FAKE ASS AND A FAKE 835 00:22:02,217 --> 00:22:03,632 HIP, AND I'M PRETTY SURE THE ASS 836 00:22:03,632 --> 00:22:05,082 CAME FIRST AND BROKE THE HIP, 837 00:22:05,082 --> 00:22:05,910 SO I DON'T KNOW WHAT THE HELL 838 00:22:05,910 --> 00:22:06,566 SHE'S DOING. 839 00:22:06,566 --> 00:22:07,464 BUT ANYWAYS, MY GRANDMA'S 840 00:22:07,464 --> 00:22:08,879 A WHORE. 841 00:22:08,879 --> 00:22:09,673 NO? 842 00:22:09,673 --> 00:22:10,329 COOL. 843 00:22:10,329 --> 00:22:11,330 IT'S MY FIRST TIME, PEOPLE. 844 00:22:11,330 --> 00:22:11,985 [laughs] 845 00:22:11,985 --> 00:22:13,504 YOU GUYS HAVING FUN? 846 00:22:13,504 --> 00:22:15,817 [cheers and applause] 847 00:22:15,817 --> 00:22:18,406 I'LL MOW YOUR LAWNS LATER. 848 00:22:18,406 --> 00:22:20,304 >> MY NAME IS BEN DE LA CREME. 849 00:22:20,304 --> 00:22:21,788 HOLD FOR APPLAUSE. 850 00:22:21,788 --> 00:22:22,444 'KAY. 851 00:22:22,444 --> 00:22:24,515 AND I'M DELIGHTED TO BE 852 00:22:24,515 --> 00:22:27,104 HERE WITH A LIVE AUDIENCE. 853 00:22:27,104 --> 00:22:28,623 I LOVE IT WHEN THERE'S PEOPLE 854 00:22:28,623 --> 00:22:29,865 JUST RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME, 855 00:22:29,865 --> 00:22:30,901 AND I CAN FEEL LIKE I CAN JUST 856 00:22:30,901 --> 00:22:31,867 REACH RIGHT OUT AND TOUCH YOU 857 00:22:31,867 --> 00:22:32,696 IF I WANTED TO. 858 00:22:32,696 --> 00:22:33,386 I DON'T WANT TO. 859 00:22:33,386 --> 00:22:34,214 DON'T WORRY ABOUT THAT. 860 00:22:34,214 --> 00:22:35,354 BUT I FEEL LIKE I COULD IF I 861 00:22:35,354 --> 00:22:36,838 WANTED TO, WHICH IS A GREAT 862 00:22:36,838 --> 00:22:38,495 OPTION TO HAVE. 863 00:22:38,495 --> 00:22:40,117 I'M FAR AWAY FROM MY HOME TOWN 864 00:22:40,117 --> 00:22:41,808 OF SEATTLE, WASHINGTON. 865 00:22:41,808 --> 00:22:43,431 IT'S THE CITY THAT NEVER DRIES, 866 00:22:43,431 --> 00:22:45,156 BUT, YOU KNOW, IT'S-- 867 00:22:45,156 --> 00:22:46,503 RAIN IS NOT SO BAD. 868 00:22:46,503 --> 00:22:47,849 IT IS A MOIST AREA, 869 00:22:47,849 --> 00:22:49,713 BUT IT'S MY MOIST AREA. 870 00:22:49,713 --> 00:22:51,646 AND I LOVE IT. 871 00:22:51,646 --> 00:22:52,923 A LOT OF PEOPLE COME THERE. 872 00:22:52,923 --> 00:22:54,096 YOU JUST NEED TO WEAR THE RIGHT 873 00:22:54,096 --> 00:22:55,374 PROTECTION, YOU KNOW. 874 00:22:55,374 --> 00:22:56,858 THERE'S A LOT OF STEREOTYPES 875 00:22:56,858 --> 00:22:59,032 ABOUT SEATTLE-ITES, BUT THEY'RE 876 00:22:59,032 --> 00:23:00,482 REALLY JUST REGULAR FOLK, 877 00:23:00,482 --> 00:23:02,829 EXTREMELY REGULAR FOLK. 878 00:23:02,829 --> 00:23:03,830 YOU KNOW, CAFFEINE--ALL IN 879 00:23:03,830 --> 00:23:05,591 LINE FOR THE RESTROOM. 880 00:23:05,591 --> 00:23:08,973 WE LOVE A GOOD REST, BUT, UM-- 881 00:23:08,973 --> 00:23:09,629 I DIGRESS. 882 00:23:09,629 --> 00:23:11,390 THE POINT IS, I FEEL LIKE I'VE 883 00:23:11,390 --> 00:23:14,047 LEARNED TO SORT OF WEAVE A 884 00:23:14,047 --> 00:23:15,877 STORY, BRING SOMEBODY ON AN ARC 885 00:23:15,877 --> 00:23:17,603 THAT REALLY ENDS SOMEWHERE WHERE 886 00:23:17,603 --> 00:23:19,156 THEY FEEL LIKE THE WHOLE THING'S 887 00:23:19,156 --> 00:23:20,537 BEEN MEANINGFUL, AND THEY'RE 888 00:23:20,537 --> 00:23:22,918 GONNA WIND UP WITH SOMETHING 889 00:23:22,918 --> 00:23:23,609 THAT MADE THE WHOLE THING 890 00:23:23,609 --> 00:23:24,403 WORTHWHILE. 891 00:23:24,403 --> 00:23:27,578 >> SO TELL US A JOKE. 892 00:23:27,578 --> 00:23:29,856 [audience murmuring] 893 00:23:29,856 --> 00:23:31,513 >> UM, GOOD NIGHT, EVERYBODY. 894 00:23:31,513 --> 00:23:33,239 [scattered applause] 895 00:23:33,239 --> 00:23:35,275 [scattered applause] >> WOW. 896 00:23:35,275 --> 00:23:39,418 >> WOW. 897 00:23:39,418 --> 00:23:41,420 >> [laughs] 898 00:23:41,420 --> 00:23:44,043 [cheers and applause] 899 00:23:44,043 --> 00:23:45,700 >> HEY, HEY, HEY, HEY, 900 00:23:45,700 --> 00:23:47,633 PUT YOUR LIGHTERS UP. 901 00:23:47,633 --> 00:23:49,117 GANJA'S IN THE HOUSE. 902 00:23:49,117 --> 00:23:51,291 YEAH. 903 00:23:51,291 --> 00:23:52,327 AS YOU COULD TELL FROM MY 904 00:23:52,327 --> 00:23:54,260 ACCENT, I AM FROM DALLAS, 905 00:23:54,260 --> 00:23:56,400 TEX-ASS, AND IT WAS NOT VERY 906 00:23:56,400 --> 00:23:57,746 EASY GROWING UP LOOKING LIKE 907 00:23:57,746 --> 00:23:59,714 THIS, WHETHER I WAS PLAYING IN 908 00:23:59,714 --> 00:24:02,026 MY GRANDMA'S CLOTHES OR PUTTING 909 00:24:02,026 --> 00:24:03,787 ON A SHOW FOR MY WELL-ORGANIZED, 910 00:24:03,787 --> 00:24:05,133 ALPHABETICALLY-ORDERED 911 00:24:05,133 --> 00:24:06,134 BEANIE BABIES. 912 00:24:06,134 --> 00:24:09,862 I WAS GA-GA-GA-GAY, OKAY? 913 00:24:09,862 --> 00:24:11,450 BUT IT WASN'T UNTIL I MOVED 914 00:24:11,450 --> 00:24:13,106 TO LOS ANGELES THAT 915 00:24:13,106 --> 00:24:15,350 I DISCOVERED MARIJUANA. 916 00:24:15,350 --> 00:24:16,834 I MEAN, I LIKE TO SMOKE. 917 00:24:16,834 --> 00:24:18,353 Y'ALL, I AM JUST FLYING AS HIGH 918 00:24:18,353 --> 00:24:20,389 AS YOUR RECEDING HAIRLINE, OKAY? 919 00:24:20,389 --> 00:24:21,356 [audience grumbling] 920 00:24:21,356 --> 00:24:23,151 >> MARIJUANA REALLY DOES HELP ME 921 00:24:23,151 --> 00:24:24,324 CALM DOWN. 922 00:24:24,324 --> 00:24:26,465 SO, Y'ALL, I WENT TO VALENCIA 923 00:24:26,465 --> 00:24:27,120 WHERE THEY FILM 924 00:24:27,120 --> 00:24:28,397 THE TV SHOW WEEDS. 925 00:24:28,397 --> 00:24:30,848 NOW, Y'ALL, IT'S VERY DRY. 926 00:24:30,848 --> 00:24:31,746 IT'S ALMOST KIND OF LIKE 927 00:24:31,746 --> 00:24:32,643 YOUR VAGINA. 928 00:24:32,643 --> 00:24:33,817 [audience grumbling] 929 00:24:33,817 --> 00:24:36,198 CAN I GET A AMEN? 930 00:24:36,198 --> 00:24:38,615 NOW, Y'ALL, I AM A TREE HUGGER 931 00:24:38,615 --> 00:24:41,100 BECAUSE IF IT AIN'T GREEN, HA, 932 00:24:41,100 --> 00:24:44,413 I'M NOT INTERESTED, OKAY? 933 00:24:44,413 --> 00:24:47,002 I'M NOT INTERESTED, OKAY? [scattered applause] 934 00:24:47,002 --> 00:24:49,315 [scattered applause] 935 00:24:49,315 --> 00:24:50,972 >> GET UP AND SHOW ME SOME LOVE. 936 00:24:50,972 --> 00:24:52,180 COME ON, GET UP. 937 00:24:52,180 --> 00:24:53,388 SHOW ME SOME LOVE. 938 00:24:53,388 --> 00:24:54,044 GET UP. 939 00:24:54,044 --> 00:24:55,286 I GOT ON ALL THIS [bleep], 940 00:24:55,286 --> 00:24:56,425 ALL THIS DRAG. 941 00:24:56,425 --> 00:24:57,496 THIS STUFF IS HOT. 942 00:24:57,496 --> 00:24:58,462 THANK YOU. 943 00:24:58,462 --> 00:24:59,118 THANK YOU. 944 00:24:59,118 --> 00:24:59,808 THIS AIN'T EASY. 945 00:24:59,808 --> 00:25:00,637 I'M NOT A COMEDIAN. 946 00:25:00,637 --> 00:25:01,500 SO--GO ON, SIT DOWN. 947 00:25:01,500 --> 00:25:02,570 SIT DOWN. SIT DOWN. 948 00:25:02,570 --> 00:25:03,502 SIT DOWN [bleep] [bleep]. 949 00:25:03,502 --> 00:25:04,192 [laughter] 950 00:25:04,192 --> 00:25:05,193 SIT DOWN. 951 00:25:05,193 --> 00:25:06,815 SO IF YOU ALL HAVE NOT ALREADY 952 00:25:06,815 --> 00:25:08,334 NOTICED, I AM BLACK, 953 00:25:08,334 --> 00:25:09,335 BUT DON'T BE WORRIED, YOU KNOW, 954 00:25:09,335 --> 00:25:10,060 YOU DON'T HAVE TO HOLD ON TO 955 00:25:10,060 --> 00:25:10,888 YOUR PURSES AND YOUR WALLETS. 956 00:25:10,888 --> 00:25:11,544 I ALREADY GOT 'EM. 957 00:25:11,544 --> 00:25:14,029 [laughter] 958 00:25:14,029 --> 00:25:14,754 GROWING UP FOR ME WAS 959 00:25:14,754 --> 00:25:16,307 REALLY HARD BECAUSE WE WERE 960 00:25:16,307 --> 00:25:16,963 REALLY POOR. 961 00:25:16,963 --> 00:25:17,930 WE WERE, LIKE, GOOD TIMESPOOR. 962 00:25:17,930 --> 00:25:18,586 >> [laughs] 963 00:25:18,586 --> 00:25:20,001 >> IT WAS REALLY, REALLY BAD. 964 00:25:20,001 --> 00:25:22,210 AND THE ONLY WAY WE HAD THE 965 00:25:22,210 --> 00:25:23,487 OPPORTUNITY TO EAT WAS, 966 00:25:23,487 --> 00:25:25,282 MY MOTHER WOULD READ US RECIPES 967 00:25:25,282 --> 00:25:26,248 FROM A COOKBOOK. 968 00:25:26,248 --> 00:25:28,527 [laughter] 969 00:25:28,527 --> 00:25:31,184 AND, OH, HOW I GOT FULL MANY 970 00:25:31,184 --> 00:25:32,979 NIGHTS OFF OF THE ROAST BEEF 971 00:25:32,979 --> 00:25:33,773 ON PAGE 27. 972 00:25:33,773 --> 00:25:35,913 [laughter] 973 00:25:35,913 --> 00:25:37,156 BUT A REALLY UNFORTUNATE 974 00:25:37,156 --> 00:25:37,812 THING HAPPENED. 975 00:25:37,812 --> 00:25:38,709 MY SISTER CAUGHT A 976 00:25:38,709 --> 00:25:39,399 EAR INFECTION, SO SHE 977 00:25:39,399 --> 00:25:40,055 STARVED TO DEATH. 978 00:25:40,055 --> 00:25:42,817 [laughter] 979 00:25:42,817 --> 00:25:43,990 I REALLY GREW UP A LOT 980 00:25:43,990 --> 00:25:44,853 WITH MY GRANDMOTHER. 981 00:25:44,853 --> 00:25:45,820 I STAYED AT MY GRANDMOTHER'S 982 00:25:45,820 --> 00:25:46,717 HOUSE, ONE, BECAUSE SHE WAS 983 00:25:46,717 --> 00:25:48,512 JUST A SWEET LADY, AND TWO, 984 00:25:48,512 --> 00:25:49,548 BECAUSE SHE HAD FOOD. 985 00:25:49,548 --> 00:25:50,272 [laughter] 986 00:25:50,272 --> 00:25:52,827 BUT SHE HAD THIS REALLY CRAZY 987 00:25:52,827 --> 00:25:54,553 OBSESSION WITH HER BILLS, 988 00:25:54,553 --> 00:25:55,657 AND IT WAS THE LIGHT BILL 989 00:25:55,657 --> 00:25:56,416 IN PARTICULAR. 990 00:25:56,416 --> 00:25:57,521 EVERYTHING INVOLVED 991 00:25:57,521 --> 00:25:58,349 THE LIGHT BILL. 992 00:25:58,349 --> 00:25:59,178 [strained, aged voice] "STOP 993 00:25:59,178 --> 00:26:00,420 RUNNING AROUND MY HOUSE 994 00:26:00,420 --> 00:26:01,076 LIKE THAT. 995 00:26:01,076 --> 00:26:02,837 YOU GONNA RUN MY LIGHT BILL UP." 996 00:26:02,837 --> 00:26:03,838 [laughter] 997 00:26:03,838 --> 00:26:05,080 "STOP FLUSHING THAT TOILET 998 00:26:05,080 --> 00:26:05,736 SO MUCH. 999 00:26:05,736 --> 00:26:06,772 YOU GONNA RUN MY DAMN 1000 00:26:06,772 --> 00:26:08,601 LIGHT BILL UP. 1001 00:26:08,601 --> 00:26:10,051 STOP BREATHING SO MUCH. 1002 00:26:10,051 --> 00:26:12,156 YOU GONNA RUN MY LIGHT BILL UP." 1003 00:26:12,156 --> 00:26:14,055 I JUST FEEL LIKE I CAN BE MYSELF 1004 00:26:14,055 --> 00:26:15,574 AND JUST LET MY HAIR DOWN 1005 00:26:15,574 --> 00:26:16,505 WITH ALL OF YOU PEOPLE. 1006 00:26:16,505 --> 00:26:17,955 >> YEAH. 1007 00:26:17,955 --> 00:26:18,611 >> OH! 1008 00:26:18,611 --> 00:26:20,475 [laughter] 1009 00:26:20,475 --> 00:26:21,476 >> GOOD TIMES. IT'S A PARTY. 1010 00:26:21,476 --> 00:26:22,650 IT'S A PARTY. 1011 00:26:22,650 --> 00:26:23,789 YES. 1012 00:26:23,789 --> 00:26:24,790 [cheers and applause] 1013 00:26:24,790 --> 00:26:26,205 >> YOU KNOW, I'VE SUFFERED 1014 00:26:26,205 --> 00:26:28,725 FROM ADHD ALL OF MY LIFE. 1015 00:26:28,725 --> 00:26:29,657 IT'S A CONSTANT STRUGGLE 1016 00:26:29,657 --> 00:26:30,658 EVERY DAY. 1017 00:26:30,658 --> 00:26:31,348 >> AW. 1018 00:26:31,348 --> 00:26:32,004 >> [laughs] 1019 00:26:32,004 --> 00:26:32,832 >> OOH, LOOK, A RHINESTONE. 1020 00:26:32,832 --> 00:26:34,593 [laughter] 1021 00:26:34,593 --> 00:26:35,835 BUT I'M ALWAYS GETTING [bleep], 1022 00:26:35,835 --> 00:26:36,525 YOU KNOW. 1023 00:26:36,525 --> 00:26:38,251 "OH, YOU'RE SO SKINNY. 1024 00:26:38,251 --> 00:26:38,942 WHY DON'T YOU JUST EAT 1025 00:26:38,942 --> 00:26:39,598 SOMETHING," 1026 00:26:39,598 --> 00:26:40,840 OR, "EAT A CHEESEBURGER, 1027 00:26:40,840 --> 00:26:43,084 YOU SKINNY BITCH." 1028 00:26:43,084 --> 00:26:44,430 AND ALL I WANT TO SAY IS, "WELL, 1029 00:26:44,430 --> 00:26:45,500 THEN GIVE ME SOMETHING TO EAT. 1030 00:26:45,500 --> 00:26:48,020 I'M [bleep] STARVING. 1031 00:26:48,020 --> 00:26:49,021 SO I'VE GOT A LITTLE 1032 00:26:49,021 --> 00:26:49,711 THEORY GOING HERE. 1033 00:26:49,711 --> 00:26:50,816 EVER SINCE I'VE COME TO THE SHOW 1034 00:26:50,816 --> 00:26:52,576 AND I MET RUPAUL, I HAVE 1035 00:26:52,576 --> 00:26:53,853 A LITTLE THEORY HERE. 1036 00:26:53,853 --> 00:26:54,889 I'M GONNA RUN IT BY YOU. 1037 00:26:54,889 --> 00:26:57,408 I'VE SEEN RUPAUL IN THE WORKROOM 1038 00:26:57,408 --> 00:26:58,858 OUT OF DRAG. 1039 00:26:58,858 --> 00:26:59,894 I SEE RUPAUL HERE ON THE RUNWAY 1040 00:26:59,894 --> 00:27:01,723 AS A DRAG QUEEN. 1041 00:27:01,723 --> 00:27:02,655 NEVER IN THE SAME ROOM 1042 00:27:02,655 --> 00:27:03,794 AT THE SAME TIME. 1043 00:27:03,794 --> 00:27:04,864 [laughter] 1044 00:27:04,864 --> 00:27:07,695 BOTH RUPAULS--SAME PERSON. 1045 00:27:07,695 --> 00:27:10,145 PRETTY SURE I CRACKED THE CODE. 1046 00:27:10,145 --> 00:27:11,112 JUST SAYING. 1047 00:27:11,112 --> 00:27:12,872 [cheers and applause] 1048 00:27:12,872 --> 00:27:14,978 >> I AM SO EXCITED TO SEE 1049 00:27:14,978 --> 00:27:16,393 THE CAST OF COCOONIS HERE. 1050 00:27:16,393 --> 00:27:17,049 [laughter] 1051 00:27:17,049 --> 00:27:18,947 YOU LOOK FABULOUS. 1052 00:27:18,947 --> 00:27:20,984 MISS, I'M OVER HERE. 1053 00:27:20,984 --> 00:27:21,812 BRING BOTH EYES. 1054 00:27:21,812 --> 00:27:23,503 I'M RIGHT HERE. 1055 00:27:23,503 --> 00:27:25,022 DAMN, PEARL HARBOR MUST HAVE 1056 00:27:25,022 --> 00:27:25,678 DID YOU IN. 1057 00:27:25,678 --> 00:27:28,716 [laughter] 1058 00:27:28,716 --> 00:27:29,889 ON A LIGHTER NOTE, I'D LIKE TO 1059 00:27:29,889 --> 00:27:31,097 LET YOU KNOW ABOUT MY FAMILY. 1060 00:27:31,097 --> 00:27:32,823 MY MOTHER IS FROM CUBA, AND MY 1061 00:27:32,823 --> 00:27:34,238 DAD IS FROM HONDURAS, WHICH 1062 00:27:34,238 --> 00:27:35,136 BASICALLY MEANS I HAVE 1063 00:27:35,136 --> 00:27:36,309 A LARGE [bleep], NO CREDIT, 1064 00:27:36,309 --> 00:27:37,172 AND A TENDENCY TO TAKE THINGS 1065 00:27:37,172 --> 00:27:38,173 THAT DON'T BELONG TO ME. 1066 00:27:38,173 --> 00:27:41,211 THAT DON'T BELONG TO ME. [laughter] 1067 00:27:41,211 --> 00:27:42,902 [laughter] 1068 00:27:42,902 --> 00:27:45,077 MY MOTHER INSISTED THAT WE STAY 1069 00:27:45,077 --> 00:27:46,561 TRUE TO OUR SPANISH HERITAGE, 1070 00:27:46,561 --> 00:27:48,528 SO MY FIRST WORDS WERE, 1071 00:27:48,528 --> 00:27:49,495 "HOUSEKEEPING." 1072 00:27:49,495 --> 00:27:53,050 [laughter] 1073 00:27:53,050 --> 00:27:54,155 I LIKE THE GENTLEMEN IN THE BACK 1074 00:27:54,155 --> 00:27:54,811 WHO'S SLEEPING. 1075 00:27:54,811 --> 00:27:55,915 MAKES ME FEEL RIGHT AT HOME. 1076 00:27:55,915 --> 00:27:58,262 CAN YOU WAKE THAT BITCH UP? 1077 00:27:58,262 --> 00:27:59,022 YEAH, THE ONE RIGHT THERE 1078 00:27:59,022 --> 00:28:00,506 WITH THE HORIZONTAL STRIPES. 1079 00:28:00,506 --> 00:28:01,680 NOT A GOOD LOOK IN YOUR THIRD 1080 00:28:01,680 --> 00:28:02,991 TRIMESTER, SIR, ALL RIGHT? 1081 00:28:02,991 --> 00:28:05,269 [laughter] 1082 00:28:05,269 --> 00:28:06,512 ALL I'VE EVER HEARD FROM THE 1083 00:28:06,512 --> 00:28:08,272 JUDGES WAS THAT WE NEED TO SEE 1084 00:28:08,272 --> 00:28:10,274 MORE VERSATILITY. 1085 00:28:10,274 --> 00:28:11,172 YOU KNOW WHAT I GOT TO SAY TO 1086 00:28:11,172 --> 00:28:12,621 Y'ALL IS THAT I WILL SHOW YOU 1087 00:28:12,621 --> 00:28:14,382 VERSATILITY WHEN SANTINO WINS 1088 00:28:14,382 --> 00:28:15,797 A SEWING COMPETITION AND VISAGE 1089 00:28:15,797 --> 00:28:17,074 WEARS A [bleep] TURTLENECK, 1090 00:28:17,074 --> 00:28:17,765 YOU HEAR ME? 1091 00:28:17,765 --> 00:28:20,457 [laughter] 1092 00:28:20,457 --> 00:28:23,529 AIN'T GONNA HAPPEN. 1093 00:28:23,529 --> 00:28:24,703 WELL, I GOT TO SAY, I HOPE YOU 1094 00:28:24,703 --> 00:28:25,911 GUYS HAD A LOT OF FUN, AND 1095 00:28:25,911 --> 00:28:27,533 BECAUSE I'M FEELING EXTRA 1096 00:28:27,533 --> 00:28:29,190 SPECIAL, I'M GONNA PUT FRESH 1097 00:28:29,190 --> 00:28:30,709 TENNIS BALLS ON EVERY WALKER 1098 00:28:30,709 --> 00:28:31,606 IN THE PLACE. 1099 00:28:31,606 --> 00:28:33,056 [laughter] 1100 00:28:33,056 --> 00:28:34,747 JELL-O ALL AROUND. 1101 00:28:34,747 --> 00:28:35,644 THANK YOU. THANK YOU. 1102 00:28:35,644 --> 00:28:36,542 THANK YOU. 1103 00:28:36,542 --> 00:28:37,267 MUAH. 1104 00:28:37,267 --> 00:28:39,303 MUAH. [cheers and applause] 1105 00:28:39,303 --> 00:28:40,270 [cheers and applause] 1106 00:28:40,270 --> 00:28:42,686 >> I GOT ZERO FUNNY FROM YOU. 1107 00:28:42,686 --> 00:28:43,998 >> I JUST DIDN'T THINK ANYTHING 1108 00:28:43,998 --> 00:28:45,585 WAS REALLY DEVELOPED. 1109 00:28:45,585 --> 00:28:47,415 >> THAT'S THE NIGHTCLUB, GIRL. 1110 00:28:47,415 --> 00:28:48,416 WHAT WE'RE TELLING YOU 1111 00:28:48,416 --> 00:28:49,728 IS WHAT IT TAKES. 1112 00:28:49,728 --> 00:28:51,522 >> [sniffles] 1113 00:28:51,522 --> 00:28:53,559 >> [sniffles] >> [laughs] 1114 00:28:53,559 --> 00:28:55,457 >> [laughs] 1115 00:28:55,457 --> 00:28:58,081 >> [laughs] 1116 00:28:58,081 --> 00:28:59,461 WELCOME, LADIES. 1117 00:28:59,461 --> 00:29:00,600 IT'S TIME FOR THE JUDGES' 1118 00:29:00,600 --> 00:29:02,361 CRITIQUES. 1119 00:29:02,361 --> 00:29:05,053 FIRST UP, DARIENNE LAKE. 1120 00:29:05,053 --> 00:29:07,918 >> YOU CAME OUT TO THE DRIEST, 1121 00:29:07,918 --> 00:29:09,886 COLDEST HOUSE IMAGINABLE. 1122 00:29:09,886 --> 00:29:10,990 YOU GOT THEM LAUGHING. 1123 00:29:10,990 --> 00:29:12,509 YOU'RE AMAZING. 1124 00:29:12,509 --> 00:29:13,372 >> LIKE, LITERALLY, MY NOTE 1125 00:29:13,372 --> 00:29:14,960 SAYS, "KILLED IT." 1126 00:29:14,960 --> 00:29:16,824 >> THANK YOU SO MUCH, DARIENNE. 1127 00:29:16,824 --> 00:29:18,584 NEXT UP, COURTNEY ACT. 1128 00:29:18,584 --> 00:29:20,034 >> I THOUGHT YOU DID OKAY, 1129 00:29:20,034 --> 00:29:21,690 BUT IF YOU'RE GONNA USE A SHTICK 1130 00:29:21,690 --> 00:29:23,623 LIKE A SONG, THAT [bleep] 1131 00:29:23,623 --> 00:29:24,935 HAD BETTER BE THE FUNNIEST SONG 1132 00:29:24,935 --> 00:29:25,764 I'VE EVER HEARD. 1133 00:29:25,764 --> 00:29:26,454 >> MM-HMM. 1134 00:29:26,454 --> 00:29:27,904 >> AND IT WASN'T. 1135 00:29:27,904 --> 00:29:29,457 >> BUT YOU'RE NOT A STAND-UP 1136 00:29:29,457 --> 00:29:31,252 COMIC, SO I THOUGHT IT WAS VERY 1137 00:29:31,252 --> 00:29:33,357 CLEVERLY CALCULATED TO PLAY 1138 00:29:33,357 --> 00:29:34,669 TO YOUR STRENGTHS. 1139 00:29:34,669 --> 00:29:35,981 >> ALL RIGHT, NEXT UP, 1140 00:29:35,981 --> 00:29:37,465 ADORE DELANO. 1141 00:29:37,465 --> 00:29:38,777 >> I LOVE THE CHARACTER. 1142 00:29:38,777 --> 00:29:40,848 YOU HAD SOME FUNNY JOKES, BUT 1143 00:29:40,848 --> 00:29:42,504 DON'T JUST THROW F-BOMBS AROUND 1144 00:29:42,504 --> 00:29:43,851 WILLY-NILLY WHEN THEY'RE NOT 1145 00:29:43,851 --> 00:29:45,128 ADDING TO THE PARTY. 1146 00:29:45,128 --> 00:29:46,888 YOU'RE RELYING A LOT ON 1147 00:29:46,888 --> 00:29:48,614 YOUR CHARM AND PERSONALITY, 1148 00:29:48,614 --> 00:29:51,410 WHICH CONCERNS ME. 1149 00:29:51,410 --> 00:29:52,204 >> [sniffles] 1150 00:29:52,204 --> 00:29:54,723 I'M REALLY, REALLY TRYING. 1151 00:29:54,723 --> 00:29:55,966 I WANT TO KNOW THAT, LIKE, 1152 00:29:55,966 --> 00:29:58,866 I'M HERE 1153 00:29:58,866 --> 00:30:01,006 BECAUSE I DESERVE IT. 1154 00:30:01,006 --> 00:30:02,386 [sniffles] 1155 00:30:02,386 --> 00:30:03,974 >> ADORE, THE CHARMING THING IS 1156 00:30:03,974 --> 00:30:06,045 A GREAT PLUS, BUT YOU'VE GOT TO 1157 00:30:06,045 --> 00:30:08,910 HAVE FAITH IN YOUR TALENT. 1158 00:30:08,910 --> 00:30:09,738 >> THANKS. 1159 00:30:09,738 --> 00:30:11,430 >> ALL RIGHT, LET'S MOVE ON. 1160 00:30:11,430 --> 00:30:12,880 BEN DE LA CREME. 1161 00:30:12,880 --> 00:30:14,674 >> I'M KIND OF GETTING BORED 1162 00:30:14,674 --> 00:30:16,435 WITH THESE OLD SHOWGIRL LOOKS. 1163 00:30:16,435 --> 00:30:18,437 >> I ACTUALLY CHOSE THIS BECAUSE 1164 00:30:18,437 --> 00:30:19,679 MICHELLE WAS SAYING THAT SHE'D 1165 00:30:19,679 --> 00:30:20,888 LIKE TO SORT OF SEE MORE ME. 1166 00:30:20,888 --> 00:30:21,578 I ACTUALLY-- 1167 00:30:21,578 --> 00:30:22,337 >> BUT IT'S GOT NOTHING TO DO 1168 00:30:22,337 --> 00:30:23,683 WITH YOUR CLOTHES, BABY. 1169 00:30:23,683 --> 00:30:24,892 IT'S STEPPING OUT OF THAT 1170 00:30:24,892 --> 00:30:26,514 CHARACTER AND SHOWING US 1171 00:30:26,514 --> 00:30:28,033 WHO YOU ARE INSIDE. 1172 00:30:28,033 --> 00:30:30,000 >> WHILE YOU HAVE INTELLIGENT 1173 00:30:30,000 --> 00:30:31,933 JOKES, YOU DIDN'T STOP LONG 1174 00:30:31,933 --> 00:30:33,555 ENOUGH TO LET YOUR CROWD LAUGH 1175 00:30:33,555 --> 00:30:35,488 OR HEAR THE JOKE. 1176 00:30:35,488 --> 00:30:38,250 >> NEXT UP, LAGANJA ESTRANJA. 1177 00:30:38,250 --> 00:30:39,389 >> HEY, HEY, HEY. 1178 00:30:39,389 --> 00:30:42,185 >> I GOT ZERO FUNNY FROM YOU. 1179 00:30:42,185 --> 00:30:43,738 YOU DO THIS THING--THIS 1180 00:30:43,738 --> 00:30:45,774 [harshly lilting] "OKAY, OKAY." 1181 00:30:45,774 --> 00:30:47,121 I WANT YOU TO STRIP DOWN THAT 1182 00:30:47,121 --> 00:30:50,641 AFFECTED FACADE THAT IS THERE, 1183 00:30:50,641 --> 00:30:51,677 AND THE FEW TIMES THAT I'VE SEEN 1184 00:30:51,677 --> 00:30:53,161 YOU NOT DO THAT, I'VE STARTED TO 1185 00:30:53,161 --> 00:30:54,128 WARM UP TO YOU. 1186 00:30:54,128 --> 00:30:55,405 ONCE YOU GO INTO THAT... 1187 00:30:55,405 --> 00:30:57,062 [babbling] 1188 00:30:57,062 --> 00:30:59,167 THEN WE LOSE YOU. 1189 00:30:59,167 --> 00:31:00,962 >> TONIGHT WASN'T A CHARACTER, 1190 00:31:00,962 --> 00:31:02,584 AND I DO--I DO TALK LIKE THAT, 1191 00:31:02,584 --> 00:31:03,240 AND I'M SORRY YOU-- 1192 00:31:03,240 --> 00:31:04,552 >> NO, NO, YOU TALK LIKE THIS. 1193 00:31:04,552 --> 00:31:06,692 THIS IS HOW YOU TALK. 1194 00:31:06,692 --> 00:31:08,280 >> [sighs] 1195 00:31:08,280 --> 00:31:10,454 I AM TRYING TOOTH AND NAIL 1196 00:31:10,454 --> 00:31:11,939 TO IMPRESS YOU GUYS. 1197 00:31:11,939 --> 00:31:12,871 >> YOU WON THE CHALLENGE 1198 00:31:12,871 --> 00:31:13,561 LAST WEEK. 1199 00:31:13,561 --> 00:31:14,251 >> BUT YOU KNOW WHAT? 1200 00:31:14,251 --> 00:31:15,425 IT DIDN'T FEEL LIKE A WIN, RU, 1201 00:31:15,425 --> 00:31:16,219 BECAUSE ALL I COULD HEAR WAS, 1202 00:31:16,219 --> 00:31:17,703 MY CROTCH IS TOO LOW, 1203 00:31:17,703 --> 00:31:18,980 MY HAIR IS OFF. 1204 00:31:18,980 --> 00:31:20,326 AND I FEEL LIKE AN AMATEUR UP 1205 00:31:20,326 --> 00:31:21,155 HERE, AND I FEEL LIKE I CAN 1206 00:31:21,155 --> 00:31:23,191 NEVER DO ANYTHING TO PLEASE YOU. 1207 00:31:23,191 --> 00:31:25,435 AND I DO LOVE MYSELF, AND I DO 1208 00:31:25,435 --> 00:31:26,850 BELIEVE I'M A SUPERSTAR, 1209 00:31:26,850 --> 00:31:28,265 AND I AM FIGHTING SO HARD 1210 00:31:28,265 --> 00:31:29,163 TO PROVE THAT TO YOU. 1211 00:31:29,163 --> 00:31:30,854 AND I'VE GIVEN UP EVERYTHING IN 1212 00:31:30,854 --> 00:31:32,338 MY LIFE TO BE A DRAG QUEEN, 1213 00:31:32,338 --> 00:31:32,994 AND I'M-- 1214 00:31:32,994 --> 00:31:34,409 >> BREATHE, BREATHE. 1215 00:31:34,409 --> 00:31:36,308 >> WE ALL DO THAT KI KI VOICE. 1216 00:31:36,308 --> 00:31:37,757 IT'S A FUNNY VOICE, BUT YOU 1217 00:31:37,757 --> 00:31:38,793 CAN'T DO THAT ALL THE TIME. 1218 00:31:38,793 --> 00:31:39,932 IT'S THE SAME NOTE WE HAD FOR 1219 00:31:39,932 --> 00:31:40,622 BEN DE LA CREME. 1220 00:31:40,622 --> 00:31:42,107 IT SEPARATES YOU 1221 00:31:42,107 --> 00:31:43,453 FROM BEING HUMAN. 1222 00:31:43,453 --> 00:31:44,730 >> YOU KNOW, IN THE REAL WORLD, 1223 00:31:44,730 --> 00:31:46,042 PEOPLE LOVE ME, AND THEY THINK 1224 00:31:46,042 --> 00:31:47,388 I'M SUCH A PERFORMER, AND THEY 1225 00:31:47,388 --> 00:31:48,734 LOVE TO COME AND SEE ME. 1226 00:31:48,734 --> 00:31:49,977 AND I GET SO BUILT UP, AND I-- 1227 00:31:49,977 --> 00:31:51,116 >> THAT'S THE NIGHTCLUB, GIRL. 1228 00:31:51,116 --> 00:31:51,910 YOU CAME IN THIS COMPETITION 1229 00:31:51,910 --> 00:31:52,945 TO GO TO THE NEXT LEVEL. 1230 00:31:52,945 --> 00:31:54,602 WHAT WE'RE TELLING YOU IS WHAT 1231 00:31:54,602 --> 00:31:55,983 IT TAKES, AND I'M NOT GONNA 1232 00:31:55,983 --> 00:31:57,294 [bleep] STEER YOU WRONG, NOT 1233 00:31:57,294 --> 00:32:00,194 FOR NO GODDAMN TV SHOW. 1234 00:32:00,194 --> 00:32:02,023 YOU'RE HERE BECAUSE I SAW 1235 00:32:02,023 --> 00:32:03,714 SOMETHING IN YOU, BUT YOU HAVE 1236 00:32:03,714 --> 00:32:04,923 GOT TO LEARN HOW TO 1237 00:32:04,923 --> 00:32:08,443 OWN YOUR STARDOM. 1238 00:32:08,443 --> 00:32:10,963 ALL RIGHT, SO LET'S MOVE ON. 1239 00:32:10,963 --> 00:32:12,931 TRINITY K. BONET. 1240 00:32:12,931 --> 00:32:15,278 >> GIRL, YOU DID US PROUD 1241 00:32:15,278 --> 00:32:16,141 TONIGHT. 1242 00:32:16,141 --> 00:32:19,489 [applause] 1243 00:32:19,489 --> 00:32:21,698 >> SO, TRINITY, I'MA TRY TO SAY 1244 00:32:21,698 --> 00:32:23,942 THIS WITHOUT GETTING EMOTIONAL. 1245 00:32:23,942 --> 00:32:25,564 I'M SO PROUD OF YOU. 1246 00:32:25,564 --> 00:32:27,393 BASED ON WHAT YOU'VE DONE IN 1247 00:32:27,393 --> 00:32:28,774 THIS COMPETITION BEFORE, THERE 1248 00:32:28,774 --> 00:32:30,638 SEEMS TO BE A CERTAIN DEFEATED 1249 00:32:30,638 --> 00:32:32,157 ENERGY THAT I'VE SEEN, 1250 00:32:32,157 --> 00:32:33,882 AND I DO THE SAME THING MYSELF, 1251 00:32:33,882 --> 00:32:35,298 AND I HAVE TO... 1252 00:32:35,298 --> 00:32:36,644 [sighs deeply] 1253 00:32:36,644 --> 00:32:38,508 I HAVE TO TALK MYSELF OFF 1254 00:32:38,508 --> 00:32:39,958 THAT LEDGE. 1255 00:32:39,958 --> 00:32:42,063 WHAT YOU'VE DONE IS YOU HAVE 1256 00:32:42,063 --> 00:32:44,617 OVERCOME YOUR SABOTEUR, 1257 00:32:44,617 --> 00:32:46,205 AND I'M SO PROUD TO SEE IT. 1258 00:32:46,205 --> 00:32:47,413 I'M SO PROUD TO SEE IT. 1259 00:32:47,413 --> 00:32:50,520 [applause] 1260 00:32:50,520 --> 00:32:52,384 >> THANK YOU FOR BELIEVING 1261 00:32:52,384 --> 00:32:53,626 IN ME, BECAUSE I KNOW 1262 00:32:53,626 --> 00:32:54,800 YOU SAW SOMETHING IN ME, 1263 00:32:54,800 --> 00:32:55,870 AND I APPRECIATE IT. 1264 00:32:55,870 --> 00:32:57,527 >> THANK YOU. 1265 00:32:57,527 --> 00:32:59,115 LET'S MOVE ON. 1266 00:32:59,115 --> 00:33:00,771 JOSLYN FOX. 1267 00:33:00,771 --> 00:33:03,429 >> KNOWING THAT BIANCA DEL RIO 1268 00:33:03,429 --> 00:33:05,535 IS A COMIC, WHY WOULD YOU PUT 1269 00:33:05,535 --> 00:33:07,399 YOURSELF BEFORE HER? 1270 00:33:07,399 --> 00:33:08,124 >> I THOUGHT SHE'D BE 1271 00:33:08,124 --> 00:33:09,332 A GREAT WAY TO CLOSE THE SHOW. 1272 00:33:09,332 --> 00:33:10,954 >> SHE IS A GREAT CLOSER, BUT 1273 00:33:10,954 --> 00:33:12,024 WHAT IT DOES IS IT PUTS THE 1274 00:33:12,024 --> 00:33:13,784 PERSON BEFORE HER IN 1275 00:33:13,784 --> 00:33:15,303 A REALLY PRECARIOUS SITUATION 1276 00:33:15,303 --> 00:33:17,547 IF YOU'RE NOT AS STRONG. 1277 00:33:17,547 --> 00:33:18,617 >> THE FUNNIEST THING WAS 1278 00:33:18,617 --> 00:33:19,790 THE A.D.D. THING. 1279 00:33:19,790 --> 00:33:21,516 THAT'S A CHARACTER. 1280 00:33:21,516 --> 00:33:22,310 THE REST OF THE ROUTINE 1281 00:33:22,310 --> 00:33:24,416 COULD BE THAT GIRL. 1282 00:33:24,416 --> 00:33:25,417 >> YOU STARTED OUT STRONG, 1283 00:33:25,417 --> 00:33:27,626 BUT THEN YOU JUST FLATLINED. 1284 00:33:27,626 --> 00:33:29,214 YOU'RE LIKE A COMEDY TERRORIST. 1285 00:33:29,214 --> 00:33:30,077 YOU CAN FLY THE PLANE, 1286 00:33:30,077 --> 00:33:32,286 BUT YOU CAN'T LAND IT. 1287 00:33:32,286 --> 00:33:35,013 >> ALL RIGHT, BIANCA DEL RIO. 1288 00:33:35,013 --> 00:33:36,462 >> I THINK YOU'RE AMAZING. 1289 00:33:36,462 --> 00:33:37,877 YOU'RE SO QUICK, BUT YOU KNOW 1290 00:33:37,877 --> 00:33:39,569 EXACTLY HOW TO LAND A JOKE 1291 00:33:39,569 --> 00:33:40,604 AND WHEN TO WAIT. 1292 00:33:40,604 --> 00:33:41,467 >> YOU KILLED IT. 1293 00:33:41,467 --> 00:33:42,123 >> THANKS. 1294 00:33:42,123 --> 00:33:44,470 >> SO, SO, SO, SO, SO FUNNY. 1295 00:33:44,470 --> 00:33:45,816 >> I THOUGHT IT WAS ABSOLUTELY 1296 00:33:45,816 --> 00:33:46,541 ASTONISHING. 1297 00:33:46,541 --> 00:33:47,887 I MEAN, YOU'RE THE REAL DEAL. 1298 00:33:47,887 --> 00:33:49,855 >> THANK YOU. 1299 00:33:49,855 --> 00:33:51,098 >> THANK YOU, LADIES. 1300 00:33:51,098 --> 00:33:52,754 WHILE YOU UNTUCK IN THE 1301 00:33:52,754 --> 00:33:54,894 FORM DECOR LOUNGE, THE JUDGES 1302 00:33:54,894 --> 00:33:57,552 AND I WILL DELIBERATE. 1303 00:33:57,552 --> 00:34:00,003 JUST BETWEEN US GIRLS, 1304 00:34:00,003 --> 00:34:01,280 WHAT DO YOU THINK? 1305 00:34:01,280 --> 00:34:03,903 LET'S START WITH DARIENNE LAKE. 1306 00:34:03,903 --> 00:34:04,559 >> SHE WAS COMFORTABLE 1307 00:34:04,559 --> 00:34:05,215 IN HER OWN SKIN. 1308 00:34:05,215 --> 00:34:06,044 SHE KNOWS WHO SHE IS. 1309 00:34:06,044 --> 00:34:06,734 SHE HAS HEART. 1310 00:34:06,734 --> 00:34:08,046 SHE PLAYED TO THE AUDIENCE. 1311 00:34:08,046 --> 00:34:09,185 I THOUGHT SHE WAS GREAT. 1312 00:34:09,185 --> 00:34:09,909 I LOVED HER. 1313 00:34:09,909 --> 00:34:11,359 >> COURTNEY ACT. 1314 00:34:11,359 --> 00:34:12,326 >> I THOUGHT HER ROUTINE 1315 00:34:12,326 --> 00:34:13,154 WAS AVERAGE. 1316 00:34:13,154 --> 00:34:14,466 >> I THINK SHE WAS SMART TO PLAY 1317 00:34:14,466 --> 00:34:16,019 TO HER STRENGTH, WHICH IS 1318 00:34:16,019 --> 00:34:17,227 HER VOICE AND SINGING. 1319 00:34:17,227 --> 00:34:18,021 >> BUT IT'S NOT EXACTLY 1320 00:34:18,021 --> 00:34:19,505 WHAT YOU ASKED FOR. 1321 00:34:19,505 --> 00:34:21,990 >> NEXT UP, ADORE DELANO. 1322 00:34:21,990 --> 00:34:22,784 >> SHE'S SUCH AN INTERESTING 1323 00:34:22,784 --> 00:34:24,165 PRESENCE ON STAGE. 1324 00:34:24,165 --> 00:34:25,615 >> IF SHE REALLY GOT RID OF 1325 00:34:25,615 --> 00:34:26,892 ALL THAT DOUBT, 1326 00:34:26,892 --> 00:34:29,515 SHE WOULD BE UNSTOPPABLE. 1327 00:34:29,515 --> 00:34:30,447 >> THINK OF YOURSELF AT THAT 1328 00:34:30,447 --> 00:34:31,207 AGE, YOU KNOW. 1329 00:34:31,207 --> 00:34:31,897 >> [laughing] OH. 1330 00:34:31,897 --> 00:34:32,725 >> TRY TO PULL YOU OUT OF 1331 00:34:32,725 --> 00:34:33,381 THE BACKSEAT OF CARS 1332 00:34:33,381 --> 00:34:34,210 TO TELL YOU-- 1333 00:34:34,210 --> 00:34:35,970 [laughter] 1334 00:34:35,970 --> 00:34:37,213 >> JUST SLAP THE [bleep] 1335 00:34:37,213 --> 00:34:38,524 OUT OF YOUR HAND AND SAY, 1336 00:34:38,524 --> 00:34:40,250 "MICHELLE, LISTEN." 1337 00:34:40,250 --> 00:34:41,182 >> ALL RIGHT, LET'S MOVE ON 1338 00:34:41,182 --> 00:34:42,252 TO BEN DE LA CREME. 1339 00:34:42,252 --> 00:34:44,185 >> HER COMEDY WAS INTELLIGENT. 1340 00:34:44,185 --> 00:34:45,152 SHE JUST DOESN'T UNDERSTAND 1341 00:34:45,152 --> 00:34:45,911 COMIC TIMING. 1342 00:34:45,911 --> 00:34:47,257 >> THE SMARTEST THING SHE DID 1343 00:34:47,257 --> 00:34:48,465 WAS, WHEN THE HECKLER HAPPENED, 1344 00:34:48,465 --> 00:34:49,604 SHE GOT OFF. 1345 00:34:49,604 --> 00:34:52,711 >> LAGANJA ESTRANJA. 1346 00:34:52,711 --> 00:34:54,368 >> I JUST DON'T QUITE GET 1347 00:34:54,368 --> 00:34:56,197 THAT WHOLE CHARACTER WHO SMOKES 1348 00:34:56,197 --> 00:34:56,922 DOPE ALL THE TIME, 1349 00:34:56,922 --> 00:34:58,751 AND YET CAN SPEAK FASTER 1350 00:34:58,751 --> 00:34:59,442 THAN THE BULLET TRAIN. 1351 00:34:59,442 --> 00:35:00,615 >> WHEN YOU GET INTO A BUSINESS 1352 00:35:00,615 --> 00:35:01,996 LIKE THIS, YOU HAVE TO BUILD 1353 00:35:01,996 --> 00:35:02,859 THICK SKIN. 1354 00:35:02,859 --> 00:35:03,963 >> YOU NEED TO BE ABLE TO HANDLE 1355 00:35:03,963 --> 00:35:04,723 THE CRITICISM. 1356 00:35:04,723 --> 00:35:05,620 NOBODY'S SAYING YOU'RE NOT 1357 00:35:05,620 --> 00:35:06,311 TRYING, GIRL. 1358 00:35:06,311 --> 00:35:07,139 I'M SAYING IT NEEDS 1359 00:35:07,139 --> 00:35:07,829 TO BE BETTER. 1360 00:35:07,829 --> 00:35:08,796 >> YEAH. 1361 00:35:08,796 --> 00:35:10,798 >> TRINITY K. BONET. 1362 00:35:10,798 --> 00:35:12,903 >> I LOVED THAT SHE LAUGHED AT 1363 00:35:12,903 --> 00:35:14,836 HERSELF AND HER LIFE AND ALLOWED 1364 00:35:14,836 --> 00:35:16,321 US TO DO THAT WITH HER. 1365 00:35:16,321 --> 00:35:18,081 >> SHE FOLLOWED LAGANJA, 1366 00:35:18,081 --> 00:35:20,428 AND SHE MADE THEM STAND UP. 1367 00:35:20,428 --> 00:35:21,567 SHE CHANGED THE ENERGY 1368 00:35:21,567 --> 00:35:22,223 IN THE ROOM. 1369 00:35:22,223 --> 00:35:23,017 >> YEAH. 1370 00:35:23,017 --> 00:35:24,708 >> JOSLYN FOX. 1371 00:35:24,708 --> 00:35:26,814 >> SHE STARTED OUT VERY STRONG, 1372 00:35:26,814 --> 00:35:29,989 AND THEN IT JUST GOT LESS FUNNY. 1373 00:35:29,989 --> 00:35:31,129 >> "OH, WOW, A RHINESTONE." 1374 00:35:31,129 --> 00:35:31,819 DONE. 1375 00:35:31,819 --> 00:35:32,475 >> [laughs] 1376 00:35:32,475 --> 00:35:33,372 >> IT'S A WRAP. 1377 00:35:33,372 --> 00:35:35,788 >> AND THEN THERE WAS BIANCA. 1378 00:35:35,788 --> 00:35:37,307 >> THE SMART THING ABOUT HER IS, 1379 00:35:37,307 --> 00:35:38,722 SHE MAKES FUN OF HERSELF. 1380 00:35:38,722 --> 00:35:40,068 NOW SHE CAN MAKE FUN OF YOU. 1381 00:35:40,068 --> 00:35:40,897 >> YES. 1382 00:35:40,897 --> 00:35:41,656 >> I WANTED HER TO COME AFTER 1383 00:35:41,656 --> 00:35:42,795 ME, AND I WAS SITTING HERE, 1384 00:35:42,795 --> 00:35:43,658 LIKE, "DO ME. 1385 00:35:43,658 --> 00:35:44,314 DO ME." 1386 00:35:44,314 --> 00:35:45,488 >> WHEN YOU WANT SOMEBODY TO RIP 1387 00:35:45,488 --> 00:35:47,145 ON YOU, THAT'S A TALENT. 1388 00:35:47,145 --> 00:35:48,525 >> SILENCE. 1389 00:35:48,525 --> 00:35:50,217 I'VE MADE MY DECISION. 1390 00:35:50,217 --> 00:35:54,428 BRING BACK MY FUNNY GIRLS. 1391 00:35:54,428 --> 00:35:56,430 BRING BACK MY FUNNY GIRLS. [laughs] 1392 00:35:56,430 --> 00:35:58,328 [laughs] 1393 00:35:58,328 --> 00:36:01,262 >> [laughs] 1394 00:36:01,262 --> 00:36:03,057 WELCOME BACK, LADIES. 1395 00:36:03,057 --> 00:36:07,026 I'VE MADE SOME DECISIONS. 1396 00:36:07,026 --> 00:36:09,926 DARIENNE LAKE, 1397 00:36:09,926 --> 00:36:13,240 YOU'RE SAFE. 1398 00:36:13,240 --> 00:36:17,830 HOLY TRINITY K. BONET, 1399 00:36:17,830 --> 00:36:19,867 HOLY TRINITY K. BONET, YOU ARE SAFE. 1400 00:36:19,867 --> 00:36:24,699 YOU ARE SAFE. 1401 00:36:24,699 --> 00:36:26,184 BIANCA DEL RIO, 1402 00:36:26,184 --> 00:36:28,703 TONIGHT YOU DIDN'T JUST KILL IT. 1403 00:36:28,703 --> 00:36:32,466 YOU WERE A MASS MURDERER. 1404 00:36:32,466 --> 00:36:34,192 CONDRAGULATIONS, YOU ARE THE 1405 00:36:34,192 --> 00:36:37,471 WINNER OF THIS WEEK'S CHALLENGE, 1406 00:36:37,471 --> 00:36:39,611 AND YOU'VE WON A ONE-OF-A-KIND 1407 00:36:39,611 --> 00:36:42,441 CUSTOM GOWN BY MARCO MARCO. 1408 00:36:42,441 --> 00:36:43,925 >> FABULOUS. 1409 00:36:43,925 --> 00:36:45,962 >> FABULOUS. >> YOU MAY JOIN THE OTHER GIRLS. 1410 00:36:45,962 --> 00:36:48,689 >> YOU MAY JOIN THE OTHER GIRLS. 1411 00:36:48,689 --> 00:36:51,381 COURTNEY, 1412 00:36:51,381 --> 00:36:52,727 YOU'RE SAFE. 1413 00:36:52,727 --> 00:36:56,386 >> THANK YOU. 1414 00:36:56,386 --> 00:36:58,526 >> LAGANJA ESTRANJA, 1415 00:36:58,526 --> 00:37:01,874 YOU AIMED HIGH, BUT YOUR ROUTINE 1416 00:37:01,874 --> 00:37:04,152 WAS A BUZZKILL. 1417 00:37:04,152 --> 00:37:05,084 I'M SORRY, MY DEAR, 1418 00:37:05,084 --> 00:37:08,812 BUT YOU ARE UP FOR ELIMINATION. 1419 00:37:08,812 --> 00:37:11,781 ADORE DELANO, 1420 00:37:11,781 --> 00:37:13,334 YOU'RE SAFE. 1421 00:37:13,334 --> 00:37:17,925 >> THANK YOU. 1422 00:37:17,925 --> 00:37:20,030 >> BEN DE LA CREME, YOU ARE 1423 00:37:20,030 --> 00:37:22,964 A SMART COOKIE, BUT TONIGHT 1424 00:37:22,964 --> 00:37:26,520 YOUR COMEDY ROUTINE CRUMBLED. 1425 00:37:26,520 --> 00:37:29,523 JOSLYN FOX, YOU ARE A LOVABLE 1426 00:37:29,523 --> 00:37:31,456 QUEEN, BUT-- 1427 00:37:31,456 --> 00:37:33,147 AND IT'S QUITE AN IMPRESSIVE 1428 00:37:33,147 --> 00:37:34,700 BUTT-- 1429 00:37:34,700 --> 00:37:37,979 BUTT-- YOUR PUNCH LINES FLATLINED. 1430 00:37:37,979 --> 00:37:39,705 YOUR PUNCH LINES FLATLINED. 1431 00:37:39,705 --> 00:37:42,570 BEN DE LA CREME, 1432 00:37:42,570 --> 00:37:45,401 YOU'RE SAFE. 1433 00:37:45,401 --> 00:37:46,229 >> THANK YOU. 1434 00:37:46,229 --> 00:37:48,507 THANK YOU ALL. 1435 00:37:48,507 --> 00:37:50,578 >> JOSLYN, MY DEAR, I AM SORRY, 1436 00:37:50,578 --> 00:37:53,409 >> JOSLYN, MY DEAR, I AM SORRY, BUT YOU ARE UP FOR ELIMINATION. 1437 00:37:53,409 --> 00:37:55,273 BUT YOU ARE UP FOR ELIMINATION. 1438 00:37:55,273 --> 00:37:57,551 TWO QUEENS STAND BEFORE ME. 1439 00:37:57,551 --> 00:38:00,208 LADIES, THIS IS YOUR LAST CHANCE 1440 00:38:00,208 --> 00:38:03,488 TO IMPRESS ME AND SAVE YOURSELF 1441 00:38:03,488 --> 00:38:06,560 FROM ELIMINATION. 1442 00:38:06,560 --> 00:38:09,045 THE TIME HAS COME FOR YOU 1443 00:38:09,045 --> 00:38:10,805 TO LIP-SYNCH 1444 00:38:10,805 --> 00:38:15,707 [echoing] FOR YOUR LIFE. 1445 00:38:15,707 --> 00:38:17,778 GOOD LUCK, 1446 00:38:17,778 --> 00:38:20,746 AND DON'T [bleep] IT UP. 1447 00:38:20,746 --> 00:38:22,783 >> ♪ STUPID GIRLS 1448 00:38:22,783 --> 00:38:25,233 ♪ STUPID GIRLS 1449 00:38:25,233 --> 00:38:27,684 ♪ MAYBE IF I ACT LIKE THAT 1450 00:38:27,684 --> 00:38:30,204 ♪ FLIPPING MY BLONDE HAIR BACK 1451 00:38:30,204 --> 00:38:32,482 ♪ PUSH OUT MY BRA LIKE THAT 1452 00:38:32,482 --> 00:38:33,380 ♪ I DON'T WANT TO BE 1453 00:38:33,380 --> 00:38:35,934 ♪ A STUPID GIRL 1454 00:38:35,934 --> 00:38:37,280 >> ♪ LIKE THIS, LIKE THIS 1455 00:38:37,280 --> 00:38:37,970 >> ♪ PRETTY WILL YOU 1456 00:38:37,970 --> 00:38:38,626 ♪ [...] ME GIRL 1457 00:38:38,626 --> 00:38:39,903 ♪ SILLY I'M SO LUCKY GIRL 1458 00:38:39,903 --> 00:38:41,077 ♪ PULL MY HAIR BACK GIRL 1459 00:38:41,077 --> 00:38:42,043 ♪ STUPID GIRL 1460 00:38:42,043 --> 00:38:42,699 ♪ PRETTY WILL YOU 1461 00:38:42,699 --> 00:38:43,355 ♪ [...] ME GIRL 1462 00:38:43,355 --> 00:38:44,563 ♪ SILLY I'M SO LUCKY GIRL 1463 00:38:44,563 --> 00:38:45,737 ♪ PULL MY HAIR BACK GIRL 1464 00:38:45,737 --> 00:38:46,910 ♪ STUPID GIRL 1465 00:38:46,910 --> 00:38:47,601 ♪ MAYBE IF I 1466 00:38:47,601 --> 00:38:50,258 ♪ MAYBE IF I ACT LIKE THAT 1467 00:38:50,258 --> 00:38:52,847 ♪ FLIPPING MY BLONDE HAIR BACK 1468 00:38:52,847 --> 00:38:54,332 ♪ PUSH OUT MY BRA LIKE THAT 1469 00:38:54,332 --> 00:38:55,125 >> [laughs] 1470 00:38:55,125 --> 00:38:58,784 >> ♪ STUPID GIRL 1471 00:38:58,784 --> 00:38:59,785 >> all: WHOO. 1472 00:38:59,785 --> 00:39:00,786 [cheers and applause] 1473 00:39:00,786 --> 00:39:01,442 >> ♪ THAT GUY 1474 00:39:01,442 --> 00:39:03,133 ♪ WILL CALL ME BACK 1475 00:39:03,133 --> 00:39:04,342 ♪ PORNO PAPARAZZI GIRL 1476 00:39:04,342 --> 00:39:06,136 >> BOTH OF THE GIRLS ON THE SAME 1477 00:39:06,136 --> 00:39:07,655 BEAT OF THE SONG NOT LOOKING AT 1478 00:39:07,655 --> 00:39:09,139 EACH OTHER JUMPED INTO 1479 00:39:09,139 --> 00:39:10,796 THE SPLITS AND HIT THE FLOOR. 1480 00:39:10,796 --> 00:39:12,695 IT IS SO GOOD. 1481 00:39:12,695 --> 00:39:13,523 >> ♪ I DON'T WANT TO BE 1482 00:39:13,523 --> 00:39:15,076 ♪ A STUPID GIRL 1483 00:39:15,076 --> 00:39:15,732 >> all: OH. 1484 00:39:15,732 --> 00:39:18,701 >> ♪ MAYBE IF I ACT LIKE THAT 1485 00:39:18,701 --> 00:39:21,082 ♪ PUSH OUT MY BRA LIKE THAT 1486 00:39:21,082 --> 00:39:23,499 ♪ STUPID GIRL 1487 00:39:23,499 --> 00:39:24,741 >> ♪ STUPID GIRL 1488 00:39:24,741 --> 00:39:27,226 >> ♪ STUPID GIRL 1489 00:39:27,226 --> 00:39:27,882 [applause] 1490 00:39:27,882 --> 00:39:29,919 [applause] >> [laughs] 1491 00:39:29,919 --> 00:39:32,956 >> [laughs] 1492 00:39:32,956 --> 00:39:36,028 >> [laughs] LADIES, I'VE MADE MY DECISION. 1493 00:39:36,028 --> 00:39:41,551 LADIES, I'VE MADE MY DECISION. 1494 00:39:41,551 --> 00:39:43,519 >> PLEASE DON'T SEND ME HOME. 1495 00:39:43,519 --> 00:39:45,072 PLEASE DON'T SEND ME HOME. 1496 00:39:45,072 --> 00:39:47,039 >> JOSLYN FOX, 1497 00:39:47,039 --> 00:39:50,526 SHANTE, YOU STAY. 1498 00:39:50,526 --> 00:39:51,354 >> THANK YOU. 1499 00:39:51,354 --> 00:39:54,840 >> YOU MAY JOIN THE OTHER GIRLS. 1500 00:39:54,840 --> 00:39:57,049 LAGANJA ESTRANJA, 1501 00:39:57,049 --> 00:39:59,500 OWN YOUR STAR POWER, MAMA, 1502 00:39:59,500 --> 00:40:01,399 AND KEEP FLYING HIGH. 1503 00:40:01,399 --> 00:40:03,297 >> THANK YOU, RU, FOR THIS 1504 00:40:03,297 --> 00:40:05,610 INCREDIBLE EXPERIENCE. 1505 00:40:05,610 --> 00:40:07,059 I KNOW THAT IN MY HEART OF 1506 00:40:07,059 --> 00:40:08,406 HEARTS, I STAYED TRUE TO WHO I 1507 00:40:08,406 --> 00:40:10,511 WAS, AND I WILL BE THE FIRST 1508 00:40:10,511 --> 00:40:13,859 WAS, AND I WILL BE THE FIRST QUEEN TO ACTUALLY CHASSE AWAY. 1509 00:40:13,859 --> 00:40:16,068 QUEEN TO ACTUALLY CHASSE AWAY. 1510 00:40:16,068 --> 00:40:17,345 >> [laughs] 1511 00:40:17,345 --> 00:40:19,762 [applause] 1512 00:40:19,762 --> 00:40:22,834 >> [laughs] 1513 00:40:22,834 --> 00:40:25,043 >> I CAME HERE TO WIN, AND IT 1514 00:40:25,043 --> 00:40:26,044 DIDN'T WORK OUT IN MY FAVOR, 1515 00:40:26,044 --> 00:40:27,425 BUT THIS WAS DEFINITELY 1516 00:40:27,425 --> 00:40:28,253 A JOURNEY FOR ME. 1517 00:40:28,253 --> 00:40:29,703 IT'S BEEN FILLED WITH MANY UPS 1518 00:40:29,703 --> 00:40:31,049 AND MANY DOWNS. 1519 00:40:31,049 --> 00:40:32,602 I'M HAPPY I MADE IT THIS FAR, 1520 00:40:32,602 --> 00:40:33,810 AND I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE WHAT 1521 00:40:33,810 --> 00:40:35,847 AND I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE WHAT THE FUTURE HOLDS. 1522 00:40:35,847 --> 00:40:38,953 THE FUTURE HOLDS. 1523 00:40:38,953 --> 00:40:40,265 >> CONDRAGULATIONS, 1524 00:40:40,265 --> 00:40:43,579 MY SEVEN WONDERS OF THE WORLD. 1525 00:40:43,579 --> 00:40:45,891 NOW, REMEMBER, IF YOU CAN'T LOVE 1526 00:40:45,891 --> 00:40:47,479 YOURSELF, HOW IN THE HELL 1527 00:40:47,479 --> 00:40:48,963 YOU GONNA LOVE SOMEBODY ELSE? 1528 00:40:48,963 --> 00:40:50,137 CAN I GET A AMEN IN HERE? 1529 00:40:50,137 --> 00:40:51,172 >> all: AMEN. 1530 00:40:51,172 --> 00:40:51,828 >> ALL RIGHT, NOW, 1531 00:40:51,828 --> 00:40:53,140 LET THE MUSIC PLAY. 1532 00:40:53,140 --> 00:40:55,107 [electronic music] 1533 00:40:55,107 --> 00:40:57,006 >> ♪ I WANT TO DANCE, DANCE 1534 00:40:57,006 --> 00:40:58,801 ♪ I WANT TO DANCE, DANCE 1535 00:40:58,801 --> 00:41:01,044 ♪ I WANT TO DANCE, DANCE 1536 00:41:01,044 --> 00:41:03,081 ♪ I WANT TO DANCE, DANCE ♪ DANCE WITH YOU